Do I have a reason to be hurt/offended?

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Lana35 Posts : 1 Registered: 8/11/12
Do I have a reason to be hurt/offended?
Posted: Aug 11, 2012 1:03 PM

Hi :)

I've been asked by my best friend in the world to be her maid of honour. Of course I was touched and honoured and said that of course I'd be such a big part of her special day.

I've already been to dress fittings, looked at centrepieces, been to venues, picked up different hair pieces etc (the normal duties of any maid of honour - I realise this) I'm paying upwards of $1500 on this wedding (shoes, jewellery, shoes, hair, makeup, tan, nails, waxing, dress, accommodation, bachelorette party, bridal shower etc etc) again I realise that this falls into the normal duty category for any maid of honour, and I'm happy to do this for my beautiful friend...but here lies my dilemma.

My friend is crazy organised and while helping her write invites to BOTH the engagement party AND the wedding (like I said, crazy organised) I found out that my serious boyfriend of two years, that I live with, hasn't been invited to either function. I realise that there is the 'no ring, no bring' policy that some brides follow, but my partner and I have been ring shopping together, he's asked my father for consent and now we're waiting for the right time to become engaged. (We've got other close friends that have very recently become engaged and we're trying not to steal any thunder) My friend, the bride, knows this about my partner and I. So technically, by the time the wedding arrives, I will have 'the ring' that is so prominent in the 'no ring, no bring' policy.

Do I have the right to be offended? I was very hurt when I found out that he wouldn't be there - but I also realise that it isn't my wedding and therefore I get no say on the guest list. They know each other, I wouldn't say ridiculously well, but the bride and I used to live together so whenever he would visit she'd be there and we go to social gatherings all together. I don't know if I should breach the topic with her or if I'm out of line? I know that other serious, live in couples have been invited - but again, it's not my wedding. I'm going to spend the rest of my life with this man, but my best friend doesn't feel he's worthy of an invite. HELP!

Confused Maid :S


PhoneCardLady Posts : 6 Registered: 4/19/11
Re: Do I have a reason to be hurt/offended?
Posted: Aug 15, 2012 10:54 AM Go to message in response to: Lana35

Ring or no ring, if you are in a relationship then they should be invited. You do not split up social units.

save the date


Syringa Posts : 115 Registered: 1/18/12
Re: Do I have a reason to be hurt/offended?
Posted: Aug 15, 2012 6:46 PM Go to message in response to: Lana35

I would ask her if she minds if your boy friend comes. She is your best friend and you are her maid of honor, so she shouldn't have a problem unless there is something else going on, such as a personality conflict between your boy friend and the groom, of which you are not aware. Perhaps it was an oversight or she doesn't know his full name or some other simple issue.


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