Destination Dilemmas

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VegasBride2013 Posts : 1 Registered: 6/16/12
Destination Dilemmas
Posted: Jun 16, 2012 7:27 PM

It's always been my dream to have a destination wedding but my mother absolutely does not travel. She was fine with the idea of not attending my wedding until she found out my father (they are divorced) will be attending. Now she hardly speaks to me. Am I supposed to give up my dream wedding and move it closer to her so she won't feel left out?

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SelahLimitedWed... Posts : 8 Registered: 6/21/12
Re: Destination Dilemmas
Posted: Jun 23, 2012 5:46 PM Go to message in response to: VegasBride2013

Well that is a serious situation. Just remember, this is your wedding and you only have one wedding. There are alternatives to flying. Trains, buses and curies. As a mother, we have to realize that everything is not about what we want. Sometimes we have to think about our children. This is your dream and your mother should let you have this day for yourself. Whatever you do, do it for yourself. Don't be a people pleaser for your day. Everyone should be catering to you. Hope I helped!

Demi

www.selahlimitedwedding.com

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NiamhMaire Posts : 92 Registered: 6/7/12
Re: Destination Dilemmas
Posted: Jun 27, 2012 4:40 PM Go to message in response to: VegasBride2013

Explain to your mother that this is your wedding day. Try and get her to see a doctor/therapist or hypnotist. Her fear of travel might be resolved - you never know and its worth a shot. Good luck I hope everything works out for you

Bing/a> |

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Syringa Posts : 115 Registered: 1/18/12
Re: Destination Dilemmas
Posted: Jun 30, 2012 7:32 PM Go to message in response to: VegasBride2013

Is there a reason your mother doesn't travel? Emotional issues, perhaps? Agorophobia? Fear of the unknown? The knowledge that your father wouldn't attend if the wedding were near your mother? (If this, then there is a control issue.)

Looking at the situation objectively, it could be said that your mother is being selfish, and perhaps controlling, by insisting on the wedding occuring in a location she prefers. It could also be said that you are being selfish by wanting your way. It seems to boil down to your relationship with your mother. Are you close and would you be deeply hurt to not have her at your wedding, or are you okay without her? How does your fiance feel? Is he also determined to have a destination wedding, or is he going along with your desires? Have you considered a post-wedding reception near your mother?

Many questions, I know, but without knowing the full circumstances, it is difficult to provide suggestions. If you look at the big picture - beyond your immediate desires - you may be able to determine what is really going on here - controlling mom, fearful mom, emotionally fragile mom, or something else.

Bottom line, do what is best for both you and your fiance and what you won't regret 10 years from now.

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