Must I have a maid of Honor? : Wedding Planning %26 Etiquette : Forums : Brides

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Must I have a maid of Honor?

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Bitty1990 Posts : 20 Registered: 3/28/10

Must I have a maid of Honor?: Posted: Mar 8, 2011 11:41 AM; Do I have to have a maid of honor? I have 3 bridesmaids, and I'm being pressured to pick one of them to be the maid of honor.
However, My maid of Honor is in Germany, (Her husband is in the Army and she is several months pregnant and can not fly out) so I'd rather not pick one...
In all honesty, I know, I should just buck up and pick one of the other girls, but that causes a whole new set of problems.

If I pick Girl A, she might not actually be able to make it out here, if I pick Girl B, who lives out here, Girl A will get her feelings hurt. Do I just go with Girl B and not care what Girl A says?
Sorry if this is confusing, lol.
Thanks everyone!

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KCI Posts : 150 Registered: 3/30/09

Re: Must I have a maid of Honor?: Posted: Mar 8, 2011 11:58 AM Go to message in response to: Bitty1990; You don't HAVE to do anything. If you would prefer to not pick a MOH, then don't pick a MOH.

My best friend since childhood is my MOH, and I have 5 cousins that are BMs. If I didn't have that friend as MOH, I'm not sure I would pick one because I wouldn't want to raise the status of one cousin over another.

*Met: 9/17/2009 *Started Dating: 11/14/2009 *Engaged: 11/13/2010 *Mr and Mrs: 9/17/2011

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PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,462 Registered: 8/30/07

Re: Must I have a maid of Honor?: Posted: Mar 8, 2011 12:41 PM Go to message in response to: Bitty1990; I'm with KCl. You don't have to have a MOH.

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Aunt Posts : 796 Registered: 12/31/10

Re: Must I have a maid of Honor?: Posted: Mar 8, 2011 1:34 PM Go to message in response to: Bitty1990; Dear Bitty,

No, you don't have to have a maid of honor.

What you do need, depending on your state or county laws, is a legal witness to sign your marriage license.

Typically, you need two people over the age of 18 to sign. Usually those two are the best man and maid/matron of honor.

Sometimes one of the two (BM MOH) are under 18 and the couple has to ask someone else to be the official witness. In your case, your MOH can't be there, so just ask someone else to sign as witness.

Check, first, on the local requirements for witnesses. Some places don't require witnesses at all.

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HananaBanana Posts : 11 Registered: 3/3/11

Re: Must I have a maid of Honor?: Posted: Mar 9, 2011 2:23 PM Go to message in response to: KCI; agreed. just do what you want- it sounds like you already have the witness covered.

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BrighterThanSun... Posts : 854 Registered: 10/17/08

Re: Must I have a maid of Honor?: Posted: Mar 10, 2011 12:01 AM Go to message in response to: Bitty1990; No problem with just having three bridesmaids--it could very well mean less drama which is always nice! There is enough stress as it is surrounding wedding planning.

If you need to have two witness sign the wedding certificate you can always ask a parent to sign it or another beloved family member/friend.

If you want some traditional MOH activities done--such as a speech--you can always ask if your BMs want to tag-team it. I've seen that done before.

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chris42005 Posts : 89 Registered: 4/6/10

Re: Must I have a maid of Honor?: Posted: Mar 10, 2011 4:38 PM Go to message in response to: Bitty1990; I would tell them that "I can't pick just one so I choose 3" and then you can divide MOH typical duties up between them. IF you wanted to, or you don't even have to do that.

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sweetfiregirl Posts : 18 Registered: 9/19/08

Re: Must I have a maid of Honor?: Posted: Apr 5, 2011 4:47 PM Go to message in response to: Bitty1990; I didnt want any of my girls (4) to feel like one was more important than than the other so I told them they all were important to me and brought different things to my life so they were all MOHs.... they were all very happy with that :)

"To the world you may be one person, But to one person you be the world"

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