Decisions Decisions

Online Users: 1,260 guest(s), 2 user(s). Replies: 5

Aquarius Posts : 3 Registered: 2/9/11
Decisions Decisions
Posted: Feb 9, 2011 10:26 AM

My fiance and I don't want a large wedding so we decided on a smaller one. We have been engaged for a little over a year and are having financial trouble due to the economy. We don't want money to continue to be the reason that we keep waiting to get married. So, we decided to go to the courthouse and make it official. We still want to have a reception/party to celebrate with all our friends and family at a later date though. Do you think it would be in bad taste to have a vow renewal ceremony and a reception for our one year anniversary?

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Dunebug Posts : 30 Registered: 11/8/10
Re: Decisions Decisions
Posted: Feb 9, 2011 10:33 AM Go to message in response to: Aquarius

If you plan to dress up your 'vow renewal' as a wedding, then I think it would be in bad taste. I, personally, think that the idea of a 'vow renewal' is kind of silly, as vows don't have an expiration date. I think Aunt used the term 'vow reaffirmation', which makes more sense to me. I think that that should be more of a private affair. If I want certain people to be there when I get married, that's when I want to celebrate with them. I don't want a pretend wedding later.

However, I think that you could do an anniversary party, which would not be in bad taste.

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Aquarius Posts : 3 Registered: 2/9/11
Re: Decisions Decisions
Posted: Feb 9, 2011 10:43 AM Go to message in response to: Dunebug

We wouldn't be "dressing it up as a wedding". When I posted this I was more so hoping for suggestions as to low cost alternatives to the courthouse. A party is a party no matter whether you call it that or call it a reception. The ceremony decision is the hard part for us. We had originally planned on eloping to Vegas, but it is so expensive to stay in the rooms there.

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Aquarius Posts : 3 Registered: 2/9/11
Re: Decisions Decisions
Posted: Feb 9, 2011 12:03 PM Go to message in response to: Aquarius

What do you guys think about the idea of getting married at a B&B? It's more formal than the JOP, but less formal than a full on ceremony. We could even stay for a couple of days.

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goodgenie Posts : 5 Registered: 2/15/11
Re: Decisions Decisions
Posted: Feb 21, 2011 1:56 PM Go to message in response to: Aquarius

My friend and now husband were married at a courthouse. A few weeks later they had a party that they called 'a celebration of love' as opposed to wedding reception. You would be surprised how inexpensive things can be when you don't attached the word wedding to it. They rented a room in their local community center and had culinary students cater the reception (they only had to pay the cost of food and provide pictures for the students' portfolio). As for alchool, a group of us decided to put our money together and bought the booze necessary for the party, which was served by the students. For those who didn't attend the ceremony at the courthouse, a friend of the groom made montage of pictures of the couple, which was projected on one of the walls of the room. For music, they made a playlist on a Ipod and hooked it to the sound system that was available. My friend told me that the whole 'celebration of love' cost less than $3000 for about 100 guests. And you know what, it was one of the best 'celebrations' I've attended. We had a lot of fun in a very intimate setting. Her celebration is the reason we want to have a small wedding too.

My suggestion is be honest and tell your close friends and family that you have a tight budget. You'll see that people who truly care for you will step up and help you any way they can.

Congratulations!

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CatStandish Posts : 2,766 Registered: 6/20/08
Re: Decisions Decisions
Posted: Feb 21, 2011 2:43 PM Go to message in response to: Aquarius

actually, in most cases, it really is the reception that is the big expense on a wedding.

However, there are some beautiful places you can go.

for example: is there some place that you love? a park or some area special to you? There is a park close to where I live that I really love. It's beautiful, has a lot of scenic choices.

There is NOTHING to stop you from hiring an officiant and a photographer and the four of you (or a couple guests) going out and doing the ceremony there. Now if you want to set up and have a reserved spot, you'll likely have to pay. But if you just want to park your car, walk to a spot, and do it, most public places would not blink. (but setting up chairs, reserving an area, etc...that you would likely have to pay a small fee for.) If there is a park reservation office, call them and find out things. However, I'm pretty sure at the park I am talking of where I am, no one would have a problem with just the informal placement of a few people.

Look around where you live. What is special to the two of you? See how much they would charge to let you have your wedding ceremony THERE. It would be more special than the courthouse, and probably a lot less than renting a church.

Just because something is not what you THINK of as a location for a wedding does not mean you should rule it out

And get the gown, no matter where you go. It's your wedding day, and you do deserve the chance to dress up.

Misty

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