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Cohabitating before marriage

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2009ToBeMrsV Posts : 257 Registered: 12/30/07
Re: Cohabitating before marriage
Posted: Aug 21, 2010 2:57 AM Go to message in response to: time94am

While my husband and I both have the same religious beliefs, we started living together early in our relationship. We stayed together a lot in the beginning and then about 6 months in got an apartment together. We were 25 at the time and at that point knew exactly what we were looking for. I had already been in 2 previous 1.5 to 2.5 year long relationships in which involved cohabiting and after going through hell with them, I set out determined that my next relationship would be "The One". I refused to settle for anything less, so when I met my husband it was completely unexpected and fell into place just the way I felt things should. We got engaged on our 9 month anniversary and 10 months after that bought a house together and a year after that got married. We are now approaching our 1 year wedding anni. and couldn't be happier.

Honestly, I think cohabiting is important because you really learn a lot about an individual that you would never otherwise know if you weren't living together. I understand that for some people it worked out not cohabiting before marriage, but I think those of you are few and far between. There are just too many quirks and funny habits to all of us that can irritate the crap out of someone else.

___________________________________ 

Engaged: January 1, 2008
Getting Married: September 19, 2009

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basodie Posts : 6 Registered: 8/18/10
Re: Cohabitating before marriage
Posted: Sep 8, 2010 6:52 PM Go to message in response to: time94am

Not religious, but I wouldn't move in with someone unless I was certain we were going to get married (i.e. engaged and planning). I find it hard enough to get through a breakup normally, and I know I would lose it for months if I had to break up and move (or get used to "Our Place" without him) at the same time. That would feel like a full-on divorce to me, so I don't want to risk it for anyone I wouldn't marry. Maybe wimpy but there you go.

Conversely I've found it pretty valuable to spend weekends with my boyfriend sometimes. It definitely helps to know his dish-washing habits and standards for household tasks... and how long we can be glued to one another before one of us begs off to read.

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MissApril Posts : 276 Registered: 1/21/09
Re: Cohabitating before marriage
Posted: Sep 8, 2010 8:25 PM Go to message in response to: basodie

Guess I'll chime in since FH and I are living together. He just moved in about... Uh... 2 weeks-ish ago. (my sense of time is warped due to a head injury)

So far things are going pretty good. We had a pretty bad spat but got over it as quick as we have in the past. And absolutely, yes, I needed to know that if I was too sick to clean the cat box for 2 days that he would take over the duty (hehe doody). Already knew we were sexually compatible, but if I didn't I would need to know before we got married. That's just too big of a deal to not find out before hand.

Life happens! I'm no longer WaitingForApril2010

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wzq103 Posts : 2,771 Registered: 9/11/12
Re: Cohabitating before marriage
Posted: Sep 12, 2012 3:30 AM Go to message in response to: time94am

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swichwang34 Posts : 1,473 Registered: 9/13/12
Re: Cohabitating before marriage
Posted: Sep 15, 2012 3:56 PM Go to message in response to: time94am

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wzq103 Posts : 2,771 Registered: 9/11/12
Re: Cohabitating before marriage
Posted: Sep 20, 2012 7:40 PM Go to message in response to: time94am

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