Okay, I obviously don't know this backstory, but I can surmise that the OP has been in a "relationship" with a man she met online and now is finally going to meet him in person and thinks he is going to propose. Wow. Just wow.
OP - Please don't do this. I am seriously fearing for your safety. You obviously have some issues you need to deal with, and you really should. A therapist might help you sort out WHY you think this is a good idea to begin with. "Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think."