Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!

Online Users: 0 guest(s), 0 user(s). Replies: 26


NessaRae615 Posts : 675 Registered: 9/23/08
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 8, 2010 11:21 AM Go to message in response to: NJ4Life

Congrats on the engagement!!! I have a few suggestions for you. I am not sure where in North Carolina you are, or really how large the state is, or if there is a certain part of the beach you want to get married. But I did see your post saying you will have 50 guests at the most. I found what looks like a gorgous location, with a GREAT deal if you have less than 60 guests.

Islander Inn
As an oceanfront hotel in Ocean Isle Beach, The Islander Inn overlooks one of the most pristine North Carolina beaches. This area of the beach is quite wide, and does not have any tide sensitivity, allowing you to get married whenever you like during the day, without worrying about the tides! Getting the entire bridal party ready and then walking out to the beach could not be easier.
Barefoot Beach Wedding - $700
  • Arbor usage & setup
  • $100 gift certificate to Isles Restaurant
  • Chilled bottle of champagne & fine chocolates for newlyweds in suite on wedding night
  • Semi Private ocean view reception area at The Isles Restaurant for up
    to 60 guests with a personalized menu (food & beverages not included in price)
  • Gift certificate for 1 year anniversary 20% off your stay at The Islander Inn
  • Complimentey night stay for newlyweds in oceanfront room
  • Up to 60 white chairs set up on beach

If you ask me thats a great way to get what you want. (here is the website to get more info http://www.oceanfrontweddingsnc.com/ceremony-islander.php )

I had a VERY small budget, and managed to pull it off. I found a ceremony/reception location for $1800 total, plus about $500 for a very nice brunch buffet, I cut costs by doing a Sunday morning ceremony. Had I done it on a Saturday night It would have been about $2500 if not more for the site. Also with this site, it looked like silverware, dishes, linens, ect... are included, and in this economy most places will be willing to work with you on price. With mine, I had to use their cateror, which was a little more than I origanly wanted, but they worked with me, and made the price go from about $62.00 per head to just under $55/per person.

Another thing to look into if you really want it on the beach, is looking for State parks on the beach, and see how much they charge, rental fees, license fees, ect, then find a nice resturant not far from there with a banquet room, for your reception.

As for the honeymoon, no one said you have to take the honeymoon right away. My DH is one of those that thought you did, and kept saying if we don't take it right away, we will never take it. But it just wasn't in our cards to go on a week long trip, didn't matter where it was...we just did not have it. So we decided to go away for 2 nights somewhere close we both wanted to go, and set up a specific amount of money to put away from everyother paycheck to be able to go on a nice trip. We are going to San Fransico for a week and a half for our 1 year anniversery, and we will be treating it like our honeymoon, because it basicly is.

You can do a wedding, and a nice weekend away for $5000 with no problems you will just have to cut out unnecesary things. Again more ideas......My wedding dress, typicaly sold for around $1200, I bought the floor sample for around $700, got it altered for like $120, and cleaned for $60, so under $1000 total for my dress, I did the inventations from Target, which were about $40 for 2 boxes, plus the ink I needed for my printer since we ran out. Flowers, I did silk flowers. I went to Micheal's and picked out the flowers I wanted and had their designer put them together for me, and my 3 BMs. The girl was a real sweet heart and taught me how to make the bouts for the men, so supplies, and labor for mine and the girls, came to under $150. The cake I splurged a little bit on, but it came to $225 for 3 cakes, delivery, and set up. Photographer, My teacher is a photographer on the side so he cut me a great deal. Something you can check into (same with the cake) isfind a college with a photography program, and ask to see several of the students getting ready to graduates portfolios, they will be needing the experiance, and may be very good.

Good luck, and try not to be to stressed, it is very possible!


Oh I almost forgot about a dj. Have a friend with a laptop, and IPOD make you a playlist in order of your events, and designate them to keep it all on track. That way you just need to pay to download the songs.




Edited by: NessaRae615 on Mar 8, 2010 11:22 AM

Reply

Agape14 Posts : 201 Registered: 12/31/08
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 8, 2010 12:12 PM Go to message in response to: ShanesGal333

One of my girlfriend's had similar difficulties when she was shopping for her first house. She had to have a certain type of house, and she had her heart set on being in a certain neighbourhood. And my advice to her, and now to you, was: if wishes were horses then beggars would ride.

Basically, she needed to get her head away from her ideal and focus on what realistically could be accomplished, and I think you should do the same. There are so many places that you can make adjustments and not have the financial freak out, and the only obstacle that I see right now is your mindset.

1) Date: you've only been engaged for 3wks and you already have a wedding date set...Well, it can get un-set since it's really early in the planning. Instead of picking a date first, look around for deals on venues and service providers and then pick your date accordingly.

2) Venue: if you only have $5k, look around for venues that suit your budget rather than picking a place before you've thought about all of the potential costs. As Art mentioned, it is not a good idea to lock yourself into paying more than half of your budget to secure a venue with the hope that you'll get reimbursed by your guests later.

3) Miscellaneous: there are a lot of miscellaneous costs that you've mentioned but haven't seemed to factor in. For example, even if your mom is making the linens you'll still have to buy the fabric (fabric can be very expensive-compare costs of renting vs buying). Flowers are notoriously expensive, my simple bouquet will be in the neighbourhood of $100-150, so check out wholesale prices online to DIY, or be very open to lower-cost options your florist suggest.

4) Honeymoon: It doesn't make sense to me that you'd spend half of your budget on a trip. Granted the money is being given to you as a gift so you can do what you want with it, but in your place I would use it to make sure my guests were well taken care of rather than to pamper myself. There've been many stories on this board of brides doing similar things, and most often guests are resentful. (e.g. guests' perspective: they only fed us hors d'oeuvres because they wanted to cut costs, but now they're going on a trip to Italy. how selfish!)

5) No savings of your own: If your father has graciously given you $5K more than a year before your wedding, why can't you two save up $2500 between now and then as your contribution to your wedding budget? That is just $25/wk each for the next 12 months. And that would increase your wedding budget significantly. It's great that you don't want to start off your marriage in debt, but starting off your marriage with a habit of saving together towards big purchases rather than just relying on your parents' money is even better.

 

 

~~Life's tough, wear a cup~~

Reply


bosoxgirl Posts : 231 Registered: 2/3/10
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 8, 2010 1:28 PM Go to message in response to: ShanesGal333

i have already down graded from wanting to go to italy to maybe somewhere nearby that's cheap.


FH and I wanted to go to Italy this fall and sat down with a travel agent a couple weeks ago. For 6 days and 7 nights plus one day added for travel, it came to a little over 3k for the entire trip (this included round trip air fare, breakfast everyday but not the other 2 meals or transportation around Italy) So figure, 4k for a week in Italy. (keep in mind that you are dealing with EURO currency and not USD so it is slightly higher)

You could still go to Italy but you wouldn't have much of a wedding with a $1000.00 budget. I don't know how you would pull it off but some girls on here have told us that they have had gorgeous weddings from a budget of $500.00 to $5k. I live in NJ and the cheapest price I found for a reception that included a sit down dinner or buffet, open bar, tables, chairs, wait staff, wedding cake, and decor was 5k. Keep in mind, that didn't include photography, music, wedding attire, flowers or transportation. You need to do your homework. Check out community colleges, too. They usually have photography majors and the students can use your wedding as an assignment for class. You could pay them a small fee for their time.

It's really all about priorities, my dear. I personally would take the 5,000 that was given and put that in a savings account so you and your FH have a "nest egg" started. Save for your own wedding. But, that is just my personal preference...

Good Luck though!

 

  

Daisypath Anniversary tickers

 

 

Reply


auntofthebride Posts : 9,354 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 8, 2010 2:54 PM Go to message in response to: bosoxgirl

Dear Bosox,

" So figure, 4k for a week in Italy. (keep in mind that you are dealing with EURO currency and not USD so it is slightly higher)"

Also keep in mind that, in general, prices are higher in Europe for similar meals and accomodations as what you would find in the United States.

For example, $100/night can get you a nice room (king or two doubles) at a Holiday Inn Express here in the US. That same $100/night (€73) in Europe will get you a cramped room with two single beds (push them together if you want to cuddle) and a small en suite bathroom.

Gasoline is much more expensive in Europe, so expect to pay proportionally more for all transport: City Metros, taxis, trains, etc.

Finally, you get socked for currency conversion fees on your credit card bill.

***

I went about three years where all the travel I did was in Europe. I got used to the tiny hotel rooms at $120/night or so. Then, I had to make a cross-country trip with some family furniture, and spent the first night in a Best Western in northern New Mexico. For $69/night I got this SPACIOUS beautiful room with two double beds. I couldn't believe how big the room was! It was just a normal Best Western room, nothing fancy, but I went into Reverse Culture Shock!

Reply


bosoxgirl Posts : 231 Registered: 2/3/10
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 8, 2010 4:50 PM Go to message in response to: auntofthebride

I went about three years where all the travel I did was in Europe. I got used to the tiny hotel rooms at $120/night or so. Then, I had to make a cross-country trip with some family furniture, and spent the first night in a Best Western in northern New Mexico. For $69/night I got this SPACIOUS beautiful room with two double beds. I couldn't believe how big the room was! It was just a normal Best Western room, nothing fancy, but I went into Reverse Culture Shock!

I have heard that the rooms are tiny and cramped. Personally, if I never see Europe, I would be alright with that.

My co worker is going to Mexico in August. For 6 days, 7 nights at an all inclusive 4 star resort plus round trip air fare, she is paying 1200.00 for herself. For two adults with a discount, it came out to 2600.00. Yes, it's not the 69.00 Best Western but I think you would get much more out of a week in Mexico than you would a week in Europe.

AOTB, did you have to pay currency fees in Mexico? I imagine they take USD and credit cards, correct?

 

  

Daisypath Anniversary tickers

 

 

Reply


VšnTillBruden Posts : 353 Registered: 1/16/10
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 8, 2010 4:57 PM Go to message in response to: bosoxgirl

Almost every major vacation hot spot in Mexico will take U.S. credit cards, or American currency. But if you're going to a more "remote" getaway in Mexico, you definitely want to invest in some pesos, just to make life easier for you, and the local shops/cafes you will be frequenting.

Love me when I least deserve it, because that is when I need it the most. (Swedish proverb)

Reply


auntofthebride Posts : 9,354 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 8, 2010 5:04 PM Go to message in response to: bosoxgirl

Dear Bosox,

"AOTB, did you have to pay currency fees in Mexico? I imagine they take USD and credit cards, correct?"

Yes, of course.

Credit cards bills are converted to Mexican Pesos, and the foreign exchange fee is added to that. If a vendor takes greenback US dollar cash, they will charge a higher price simply because they have to pay foreign currency exchange charges when they take that money to their bank and convert to pesos.

There's really no good way around foreign currency exchange charges. No matter what you do, you'll get hit with fees. The BEST way to get foreign money is to exchange with a friend. That way you and the friend eliminate the bank middle man and both get a good rate. Anytime I hear of anyone coming back from Europe, I offer to buy their leftover Euros. It's a winning deal for them and for me.

"I have heard that the rooms are tiny and cramped. Personally, if I never see Europe, I would be alright with that."

Ah, but the only way you'll see the Eiffel Tower is to go to Las Vegas. I love going to Europe and love the challenge of a totally different culture. It is not everyone's cup of tea, I understand.

Not all the hotel rooms are tiny and cramped. Come up with €200-300 / night and you'll get all kinds of elbow room. I stayed in a GREAT place in Sweden, last year, that was an extended stay hotel. The rooms were spacious and the price was right. Drawback: Maid service only weekly, or upon check in. I got a sparkling clean room to start, but had no maid service the remaining five days I was there.

Reply


ShanesGal333 Posts : 11 Registered: 3/3/10
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 9, 2010 7:13 PM Go to message in response to: auntofthebride

I emailed about the house and we were going to get it until she said there was a 1000 event fee. so the house option is out. and thats so crazy about the one who posted about the islander inn, because thats exactly what im looking at getting! :)
we are driving there tomorrow to take a look at everything. however with their reception, its not exactly what im wanting price wise so im still stuck on that. im talking about the price per person for food. too expensive for what we want. yet it make still end up being an option if we cant find elsewhere to go.
so now im thinking, get married there with them and try to find somewhere to have my own reception. im thinking something very casual now, maybe getting smithfields chicken and bbq catered(they have a package for 50 ppl) and buying a couple kegs and have that be that! i also know a dj, i had forgotten about. so i will be contacting him to see if he can cut me a deal.
as for the photographer, whoever said the local college idea was right on track with what i was thinking about!
also, for the cake, i was looking at walmart cakes and they were i think 130 bucks for a 3 tier cake.
im making my own bouquets for all the bridesmaids and myself, daiseys with some roses for me. might even do silk, not sure yet.
my step mother said she would do the centerpeices, which i just wanted something simple, a vase with some sand, white candle and some sea shells. very pretty and cheap.
my mother said she would sew the linens if need be, she loves to sew so that would be a great contibution for her :)
im going to print the invitations, so that saves a ton there too.
and the dress, i havent looked around too much yet but there was one on davidsbridal for 400 that i loved!
I also looked around for trips to europe and was very surprised that it may be an option after all. we were thinking greece, and i found a 4 nights hotel and flight combo for about 500 bucks per person. that was the cheapest i saw. i also saw some for about 1000 per person, which we would also be able to do. and we dont have any issues with saving money ourselves, we just had a budget that we figured we could work with until i started planning and saw how much things were.

the date is set and is not going to be changed. april 23 2011 fell on our 2 year anniversary, and i thought it was fate :) so that is why we were able to pick it so fast because we both thought of it the day we got engaged and how perfect that would be. so its not just some random date, it has meaning to us.

but i will keep everyone updated with how it goes tomorrow, and thanks again for all the amazing ideas!

"Ever thine, Ever mine, Ever Ours"

wedding websites

Edited by: ShanesGal333 on Mar 9, 2010 7:28 PM

Reply


ArtBride Posts : 4,838 Registered: 5/9/07
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 9, 2010 7:29 PM Go to message in response to: ShanesGal333

Who's being rude? I've seen nothing expect good advice, here. What do you think about everyone's comments? Any good ideas? Learned something? Or do you think we're rude for disagreeing with you?

DaisypathWedding Ticker

Vice President and Guardian of the Toilet Brush of POOP: People Offended by Offended People

Reply


ShanesGal333 Posts : 11 Registered: 3/3/10
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 9, 2010 7:47 PM Go to message in response to: ArtBride

im still new to the whole blog thread thing so i didnt know that when i reply to a post it still goes to the end. but i cant remember who it was but someone said "get real" and that i felt was uncalled for. i get on this site to share ideas etc not to be told to get real. she was the only one though, everyone has had amazing ideas and i am very grateful!

"Ever thine, Ever mine, Ever Ours"

wedding websites

Reply

jacksbaby Posts : 4 Registered: 5/28/07
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 9, 2010 7:50 PM Go to message in response to: ArtBride


o

Reply


BibliophileMom Posts : 80 Registered: 3/26/09
Re: Financially Freaked OUT!! pls help!
Posted: Mar 10, 2010 4:22 PM Go to message in response to: ShanesGal333

Just to give you some ideas of what's possible (and of course, everything depends on WHERE you are, but deals are definitely out there!).

I'm having my wedding ceremony in the Caribbean, and then an at-home reception. Here are the costs for the basics:

Ceremony (our immediate families only):
Marriage license - $100
Morning ceremony on the beach - $400
My dress - $180 (my mom is doing alterations for free)
Fiance's clothes (hawaiian shirt and slacks) - $80
Flowers (my bouquet, flower girl basket, small bouquets for all the women, boutteniers for all the men) - $425
Photographer (ceremony plus 1 hour of photos, 75 retouched pics on a CD, unlimited access to all photos on his website) - $450
Cake (and we didn't have to go this expensive, by any means) - $185
Lunch at restaurant afterward for 10 people - $300

Total ceremony cost - $2120

At-home reception (about 100 people):
Reception hall (owned by the park department in our city) - $380
Caterer (small, local caterer with her own restaurant) - $800
DJ (we could have gone with an iPod but would have had to rent speakers, etc) - $750
Alcohol (we bring our own) - $300 (my parents are amateur winemakers, and made a special vintage last year just for our wedding, so we're only buying a case of extra wine in case someone doesn't like the type, and 2 half-kegs of beer)
Invitations (could definitely save money on these by going to Wal Mart or similar) - $200
Linens - $150
Decorations - $300 (this is a rough estimate - we are making our own, and no flowers because fresh are expensive and I don't like fake - sand, seashells, and tealights in assorted glass containers - picked up glass containers from Goodwill over the last several months - white xmas lights, some tulle, and some framed pictures from the wedding)
Cake (2 tiers plus 2 sheet cakes) - $100
Photography - $0 (favor from a friend)
Clothing - $0 (wearing the same clothes we got married in)

Total reception cost - $2980

Total - $5100

Also, there are MANY ways we could have cut this even further, but we didn't have the time, the skills, or the inclination. We didn't need fresh flowers at the beach, but I really wanted them. We didn't need an expensive cake at the wedding lunch, but my fiance really wanted it. As far as the reception, I don't think we could cut the food and drink costs any further, but we didn't absolutely have to have a DJ. Finding a place that lets you bring your own alcohol will save you TONS of money - especially if you limit it like we are - 3 types of wine, 2 types of beer, punch, water, and juice.

Don't forget - this doesn't include our rings or our honeymoon. Also, I'm sure there are other little details that I'm forgetting, but the point is - if you research, you can find great deals. Like our caterer - $7 a person! For an all-you-can-eat buffet dinner, 2 main courses, veggies, salads, bread, a punch fountain, coffee, and all dishes and glassware. And her food is delicious!


Reply
RSS

Thank You
for Signing Up!

Check your e-mail inbox for the latest updates from brides.com

Give a Subscription to Brides Magazine as a Gift
Subscribe to Brides magazine