Need to Lose Weight

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CaliGa8r Posts : 12 Registered: 1/29/10
Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Jan 29, 2010 11:50 AM

I've been overweight for quite awhile. My FI loves me for me and said that I'm beautiful the way I am when I asked if he would still marry me if I couldn't lose weight in time. So we're all good on that front! Anyway, I want to lose weight for me. I've been wanting to for years now. I used to be quite thin and have a very small frame, but having two children back to back and an addiction to desserts have turned baby weight into nearly eight years of pure fatness. Can't keep blaming that! Our upcoming wedding is my motivation. I recently graduated, after having taken time off to raise my children as a single mom, and when I received my graduation pictures I cried for nearly an hour. I do not want to look at my wedding pictures and feel that same shame.

A few weeks ago, I joined a webpage called SparkPeople, which helps calculate what I'm eating. For my height and current weight with getting next to no physical activity, I should be eating 2200 calories per day to simply maintain. Cutting 500 calories per day for the week should result in a 1lb loss, right? Right. My diet plan on SparkPeople has me at 1200-1600 calories per day, which I have stuck to faithfully, barely ever going above 1200. That's a 1000 calorie deficit, resulting in a 2lb/wk net loss. Or so it should. I ended up gaining 9 lbs in a week and felt completely hopeless. I did more research, spoke with my doctor, and realized that I was simply not getting enough water, causing the weight gain of water retention. I immediately started drinking at least 100oz of water per day (half your weight in ounces of water) and within 2 days I've lost 5lbs of the water weight gain from the past week. So I'm still heavier than when I started, but really believe at least the extra 4lbs will come off rather quickly.

So now that I know I neeed more water, eating correctly and am actively making sure I do so, I need to start exercising. I've been given the go-ahead from my dr to start an exercise regimine (provided I take it slow if I feel I need to). Last year I had a slip-and-fall and ruptured a couple of disks in my back (L5/6, C3/4). I've received plenty of therapy and whatnot for it, but the pain lingers so I don't want to overdo it at the gym. We have a gym in my apartment complex, but I haven't been able to muster the courage to go work out. I'm afraid that because I'm carrying around so much extra weight that I'm going to end up hurting myself. I haven't worked out regularly in a year and that was pretty short-lived as well. I'm afraid I'll lose my motivation and end up walking down the aisle fat and unhappy. So my plea to you all is how can I keep myself motivated so that I don't fall into the trap of self-conscious failure and break away from feeling so afraid of getting skinny? It's weird, but I haven't been skinny for so long now that the thought of not being able to get to it frightens me enough to not want to even try out of fear of failure. I know this is ridiculous, but I really do need help to break away from the comfort of being a fatty.
"Marriage is not only the beginning of a relationship but also the end of a life long search for the other half of your soul."


springorchid Posts : 176 Registered: 4/8/07
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Feb 8, 2010 11:03 AM Go to message in response to: CaliGa8r


Frist, it is great that you are trying to get control of you weight!

Now for some motivation: one thing that you can do is post pictures around your kitchen, at work, with your food money, etc that remind you of what you are working could be your dress, it could be the venue, it could be your kids or your FH. You could do different pics for different locations. As long as it is nice and big so that when you go to open the fridge or buy your food you see exactly why you are working so hard.

Like the PP said, you do need to give yourself some time each week that you can go all out. I like to cook, so I can bake my oen treats which gives me more control. My favorite cookbook for disserts: "Baking with Agave Nectar" by Ania Catalano. Its all whole wheat and, since its made with agave nectar, its all low-glycemic which is better for your sugar levels. There is a chocolate mousse that is SO good. Its made with tofu, not dairy. AMAZING!

As far as working out, do you have access to a pool? Water arobeics would be low impact, which would be easy on your back. What ever you do, don't go too fast or too hard. And you can always think of your work outs as a trade. If you ate too many calories, just work out 15-20 min more one day. Don't beat yourself up if you slip on your diet!

Make small goals and be realistic! Like you said, you can lose max 2lbs per week (and still be healthy about the whole thing), so figure out just how much (max) you could lose before your wedding and make that your goal rather than some number that is you ultimate goal (ie you want to lose 20lbs by the wedding but you only have time to lose 12lbs, so your wedding goal would be 12lbs). This will help you not be dissapointed on your wedding day if you haven't gotten down 20lbs because you will know it just couldn't have happened. And one of the biggest things, don't weigh yourself ever single day.

Good luck!


tgriffit80 Posts : 2 Registered: 11/28/09
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Feb 10, 2010 6:38 AM Go to message in response to: springorchid

My wedding is next June and I'm tryng to lose a significant amount of weight before then. It is very frustrating when you don't see results right away, I too am trying to keep motivated! I know the style of dress I want to wear and I've found picturing your goal is very helpful. Losing the weight is definitely something I've needed to do for awhile. The wedding is just motivation not the reason. I'm also trying to embrace the exercise as an escape from the craziness of my day instead of a chore I have to do. Good Luck!


joynhiking Posts : 2 Registered: 4/19/10
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Apr 19, 2010 2:52 PM Go to message in response to: CaliGa8r

I totally understand your frustration with losing weight. It is so discouraging to feel that you are doing everything and the scale just does not show it. I too struggled until I was introduced to this wonderful product. It is organic and very healthy. Once I started using it the weight just melted off of me. In nine days I loss lbs., I have continue to use the product and have lost 30 lbs. I feel great not hungry or tired. It has given me so much energy the healthy way. There no stimulants in this product. I have provide a link if you are interested in learning more about and also feel free to give me a call to discuss further.

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Tingling4Him Posts : 1 Registered: 4/22/10
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Apr 22, 2010 11:49 AM Go to message in response to: CaliGa8r

It's important to set goals for yourself. Perhaps you would like to complete a charity walk or complete a 5k run, lose x number of pounds, etc. Once you have your goals in mind you can prepare to see them through. What works for me is to decide on an athletic event I would like to complete. Then I focus on training and preparing myself to reach this goal. That way I am exercising with an objective in mind. You will find no other feeling like reaching that finish line..!


kellylafoyette Posts : 1 Registered: 5/25/10
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: May 25, 2010 3:43 AM Go to message in response to: CaliGa8r

Wow that's so crazy, I didn't know you could retain water so easily by not drinking enough. I've always thought it was the other way around


Erika713 Posts : 1 Registered: 3/22/10
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: May 27, 2010 12:30 AM Go to message in response to: CaliGa8r

I know exactly how you feel! I wish I could give you advice from experience of overcoming the battle of the bulge - but I am struggling too! However, I recently visited a nutritionist and she told me a few things. As everyone else said, take it day by day (which I know - is easier said than done) but maybe getting a bridesmaid or even your mother or your FH or just some sort of physical support system can help. Only if you are both willing to stay committed - because if you are not it can backfire and you can end up sabotaging each other. Also, maybe incorporating your children into your routine - even if they are young, instead of going to your gym and really working out, take a walk around your apartment complex, go to a park and walk around the perimeter, while they play, etc... If you involve your kids you are promoting good behaviors of physical excercise (an healthy eating too!) and that is not only beneficial for them, but that should be a great motivator for you too - as you are giving them the tools WAY early on to be healthy and active! :D

Another thing I would recommend is investing in a pedometer. I have an Omron (Walking Style II) and you can find it on for like 20.00. It's really easy to use and a GREAT motivator. I keep mine on my bed-stand so when I wake up in the morning I just grab it and go, that way i'm not missing out on ANY steps! I was told (and maybe I even read it on the Omron manual) that if you make it a target to get 10,000 steps a day that that living an active lifestyle; but, a goal of 12,000-16,000 is ideal to really helping you lose weight. Now, to get 10,000 steps in a day is a bit of a hassle for me. So I try to make realistic goals (especially because I am a student and am seated for most of the day - as I'm sure you can relate with!) I aim for 7,000-8,000 a day, and I've lost about a pound a week with that and a 1400 cal. diet (with - might I add - cheating too!) . It's all about starting small and working your way up. I've only had the thing for about a month, but I can't get out of bed without grabbing it and clipping it to my hip! I can usually get in 3000-4,000 steps a day with out going to the gym, but when i do go I get on the treadmill for a mile and then get on a bike machine (the sitting ones that support the back) for 10 miles at a medium resistance for 45 minutes. Going to the gym and doing that alone, gets me about 9,000 steps, and you add the extra 3,000ish other steps throughout the day and that's weightloss in progress! LIke I said it is challenging, but it makes you challenge yourself - I know this thing is making me strive to do more and work harder; in fact, I'm the type of person who tries to find the closest parking spots wherever I'm at, but now I find myself parking farther away just so I can get some more steps in... The reality is, we all have our off days - but not to stress about them!

I know you said you have your food menus and stuff down, but I've been told a HIGH fiber diet (LOW fat - of course) is the best way to lose weight, because high-fiber foods fill you up better (making you less likely to binge/crave) and keeps your body digesting those nutrients! I typed "high fiber, low fat meal plans" into google and looked for a 1400 cal. based plan and it came up with some really good ones. I might be worth your while to just look into (that is if you haven't already! :D)

Well anyway, BEST of luck with everything! I know I'll be in the same boat as you!

Hope I could help!

BTW- the picture idea is also REALLY good! AND if you start craving during the day i've heard sucking on a lollipop, jollyrancher, or any (1) hard candy helps curb hunger, OR really strong flovered gum like cinnamon (yum!) :D


cabride531 Posts : 9 Registered: 9/14/10
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Sep 15, 2010 4:32 PM Go to message in response to: CaliGa8r

Hi Cali,

First of all. Congrats on your first BIG step. The hardest part is getting started.

Everyone here has great suggestions about diet and exercise.

Have you considered looking at Weight Watchers? For a long time I always saw it as something that my mom did and I was embarrassed to admit I needed the help. I figured I could do it on my own.

I joined Weight Watchers almost 2 years ago and it was hands down the BEST decision I have ever made. I was terrified the first time I went because I was so self conscious about my weight and all the other baggage we all carry around. But what I realized is that I'm not alone. You're not alone either.

Having the support system of the group meetings at WW was KEY for me. We talk about our failures, we celebrate our successes, and we offer each other tips and encouragement from week to week.

I wrote about how I reached my goal weight on my blog if you're interested:

The thing you have to remember is that it's all about patience. It will take time and you will have ups and downs. But if you stick with it and know that you're only human and you're doing your best, you will succeed!

Good luck with your journey and congrats on your wedding!




tiffanyperk Posts : 1 Registered: 9/23/10
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Sep 23, 2010 5:17 AM Go to message in response to: CaliGa8r

That's also my problem my dear. I don't know what to do anymore. I am walking every morning before I go to work and I have been eating less for 2 months now but I don't lose pounds that much. I'm also running once a week.


beachgal2004 Posts : 80 Registered: 2/6/07
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Oct 13, 2010 10:16 PM Go to message in response to: tiffanyperk

The problem with me is my huge sweet tooth lately :( Also I just bought my dress in March and had a baby recently. So I have to try to get in a size 16 dress. My FH is gonna try to lose weight with me.

:) love ya


louiseramsay Posts : 1 Registered: 10/25/10
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Oct 25, 2010 3:31 PM Go to message in response to: beachgal2004


i am looking for some support to help me loss weight that is in the same boat.
i have bought my dress that is a size smaller and i have put on a stone from buying it.



SarahSarah Posts : 93 Registered: 10/9/09
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Oct 29, 2010 2:08 PM Go to message in response to: CaliGa8r

I joined cardio kickboxing recently, and I LOVE it! The reason I think it works for me is because there is someone telling you what to do, and too many machines in a gym confuse me, and I have an anxiety disorder, so I haven't been able to make it to a large gym. Cardio kickboxing burns TONS of calories in an hour, and I've already noticed a different in the 4 sessions I've done. I don't feel lumpy and sluggish. My clothes are a little smaller now. I haven't lost much weight yet, just a few pounds, but I'm gaining muscle! I am also helping my heart and lowing my risk of diabetes, which runs in my family. I'm only 28, but I'm starting now!

You just have to find something you like, so you don't get bored. Eat what you want, just eat LESS. And drink ALOT of water. I drink a quart of water a day and have been for a few years. My skin is never dry anymore, even in the harsh Midwest winter. I put some Crystal Light in my water because sometimes I need a little favor since I stopped drinking pop.

I also stay away from sugar. Sugar is in everything. Cereal, granola bars, flavored oatmeal, "healthy"'s digusting how much sugar they put in stuff and then tell you it's healthy. I don't eat yogurt or fruit. Fruit has natural sugar, I treat it as a snack if I do have it at all.

I eat steamed veggies, fish, canned tuna, rice, beans and lean meats most of the time. I also don't eat breakfast. The reason is because nowadays there is no reason to have 3 huge meals a day, we don't toll the fields all day long, we don't need to eat that much. I have an office job, so it's not manual labor, I don't need all those calories.

Some things work well for others that may not work for you. Focus on getting healthy, not getting 'skinny'. Skinny is not the same as healthy!


Janny7878 Posts : 6 Registered: 12/17/10
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Jan 3, 2011 1:18 PM Go to message in response to: SarahSarah

1. High fiber
2. High protein
3. Burn atleast 400 calories. (elliptical machines tone you really well and they also donít put pressure on your joints)
Congrats and best of luck!


beachgal2004 Posts : 80 Registered: 2/6/07
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Jan 19, 2011 8:00 PM Go to message in response to: Janny7878

I am a big old pig

:) love ya


kacieincognito Posts : 3 Registered: 2/2/10
Re: Need to Lose Weight
Posted: Feb 9, 2011 4:22 PM Go to message in response to: CaliGa8r

I bought my dress at the Running of the Brides at Filene's Basement and got a $4500 dress for $250!! I bought it a few sizes too small and lost a lot of weight on WW to get into the dress the healthy way. That dress was my motivations. It didn't let me give up. It was crazy, but it worked. You can read about my race to get into the dress on my blog: and now I'm fighting the scale yet again: I've lost about 70+ lbs and I'm still going!


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