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Being weird about bridesmaids?

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bridalBunch Posts : 14 Registered: 1/18/10
Being weird about bridesmaids?
Posted: Jan 24, 2010 10:42 PM

Hi friends,
I'm trying to choose bridesmaides. I'd like to ask a close cousin to be among the few. She's getting married this summer, a couple months before me. She didn't ask me to be her bridesmaid so if I ask her to be mine, will this be weird? Will it make her feel weird? I don't want to do that. I don't mind in the least that I'm not in her wedding and it doesn't sway my decision at all of wanting her in mine. Does this concern even make sense? What do you think?
Thanks,
B

october_2010 , kansas
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auntofthebride Posts : 9,357 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: Being weird about bridesmaids?
Posted: Jan 25, 2010 8:31 AM Go to message in response to: bridalBunch

Dear BB,

I don't think it's weird at all. I have a friend with five sisters. Guess who were her bridesmaids: the five sisters. That friend has been a bridesmaid in other weddings. She has known all her life that her five sisters would be her bridesmaids.

Could be there is something similar going on. Your cousin could have some "must-ask" ladies and you don't. She could be having a smaller wedding party.

I wouldn't worry about it. Go ahead and ask her. When you do, just express your honest feelings about not being concerned about not being in her wedding.

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FrancieElaine Posts : 655 Registered: 6/26/09
Re: Being weird about bridesmaids?
Posted: Jan 25, 2010 11:03 AM Go to message in response to: bridalBunch

I do not think it is weird at all. I am sure your cousin will be very happy to be in your wedding. You seem like a very caring and gracous person.

Francie Elaine, The Bride Whisperer

www.bride-whisperer.com

http://twitter.com/BrideWhispering

http://bridewhisperer.blogspot.com  

 

october_2010 , kansas , north_carolina
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JerseyGirlVA Posts : 311 Registered: 9/17/09
Re: Being weird about bridesmaids?
Posted: Jan 26, 2010 1:45 PM Go to message in response to: bridalBunch

BB it's definitely not out of the ordinary to ask someone to be one of your BMs while they may not have asked you to be in their WP or vise versa.
You select who you want to be in your WP & that is your choice & your choice only.
In the past I've seen a 20 person WP, 10 BM & 10 GM, simply because the bride felt as though she should invite her FH into her BP. The bride was definitely a bridezilla & wanted a huge WP & lavish wedding, but the groom had GM who he barely knew. It can get out of control real quick if you worry too much about other people's feelings when it comes to your wedding.
Goodluck =)

"Have I Told You Lately that I love you? Have I told you there's no one else above you? Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness, Ease my troubles, that's what you do." -Rod Stewart

october_2010 , kansas
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NJ4Life Posts : 3,358 Registered: 8/10/07
Re: Being weird about bridesmaids?
Posted: Jan 26, 2010 2:20 PM Go to message in response to: bridalBunch

I asked my BFF to be in my wedding and she didnt ask me to be in her's. I wasn't upset at all. I was kinda hoping but I didnt want to expect anything. I think you should ask people you are the most comfortable with, not just b/c they asked you or vice versa.

New Jersey: We have dumps, bays and cement boots and we know how to use 'em

october_2008 , october_2010 , kansas , central_new_jersey
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bridalBunch Posts : 14 Registered: 1/18/10
Re: Being weird about bridesmaids?
Posted: Jan 26, 2010 8:52 PM Go to message in response to: NJ4Life

All good points. I'm feeling much more confident that I'll just ask her anyway.
Thanks for the advice!

october_2008 , october_2010 , kansas , central_new_jersey
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