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Online Users: 1,325 guest(s), 0 user(s). Replies: 23

Lilmisssouthern... Posts : 658 Registered: 8/12/08
Updated
Posted: Oct 28, 2009 10:49 AM

Ok I took a break from the boards for a while... It all became a little overwhelming.

Mr. B and I are NOT married. We are not together. We are officially broken up seperated or whatever you want to call it.

We did however have one hell of a party that was on our "wedding date" Every attendee was informed not to bring gifts or cards. We had already paid the money for the wedding and were not going to waste it so we threw a big party... it was a blast.

Then we went our seperate ways. I found out a lot more about his extra curricular activities that were definitely unacceptable. He had been hiding a lot more than even I knew like the most of you ladies advised and sure enough he had a lot more skeletons than I knew...

I have since moved out of the house and into an apartment with a friend of mine. I told B that he has a lot of growing up to do as he is 28 and not 21. it was a rough decision but I REFUSE to stay with someone who lied as much as he did for as long as he did... he jeopardized my custody of my son and that was my number one reason for saying "Peace out!"

I wanted to let everyone know the little update as I have not been on since then...


virginia
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NJ4Life Posts : 3,358 Registered: 8/10/07
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 11:09 AM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

Wow Drm, I admire your courage. I truly do. That was a very brave decision. I had been wondering about you...

I hope you stick around the boards though.

New Jersey: We have dumps, bays and cement boots and we know how to use 'em

virginia , october_2008 , central_new_jersey
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Rose217 Posts : 475 Registered: 8/9/08
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 11:11 AM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

I admire you for putting yourself first and doing the tough thing, which sounds the right thing for both you and your daughter. Congratulations, and good luck in the future!

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CheetahAngel Posts : 2,017 Registered: 11/29/08
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 11:28 AM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

I've been wondering about you too. I am so glad that you are starting a new life. You are a strong woman and like Bally said you have balls of steel lol. I wish you the best of luck and please stick around the boards :)
                           
  

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virginia , connecticut , october_2010
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kelleyiskelley Posts : 11,593 Registered: 7/2/06
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 1:33 PM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

Sounds weird, but this makes me really happy. Happy that you didnt go through with this, that you found the strength to see the relationship for what it was, and that you didnt have to go through a much worse, more complicated divorce years down the road. I get happy whenever a woman stands up for herself and says, No, Im not going to live this way, Im not going to be your doormat. So, good for you. I hope we werent too harsh on you earlier, but honestly, I would say teh exact same things I said to you before, because I truly think thats what people need to hear when they are inside the situation and perhaps cannot see it themselves. You will grow and become a stronger, better person from this, and in your next relationship, you will go slower and be more careful. And when its right, you will know. And more importantly, when its NOT, youll kknow that too. Our instincts get better the more times we deal with this stuff ... right now is a good time to focus on you though.

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october_2006 , virginia
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MissApril Posts : 276 Registered: 1/21/09
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 1:38 PM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

Wow Drm, that was so brave of you. I'm just gonna repeat all the pp's here and say you did the right thing. And wow, to then have the party anyway. I could not have done that. You're awesome.
CoolStick your head out the window and smile for a satellite picture!Tongue out

virginia , october_2010 , illinois_chicago
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cyndi33 Posts : 2,585 Registered: 1/3/07
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 2:01 PM Go to message in response to: MissApril

Good for you Drm, for all of it, making and sticking to your decision, having the party anyway, not settling. Way to go!!

 Proud Member of P.O.O.P.,  People Offended by Offended People

march_2007 , virginia , october_2010 , illinois_chicago
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brownegirl Posts : 523 Registered: 10/14/08
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 6:23 PM Go to message in response to: cyndi33

Drm, I am so proud of you for having the strength to put yourself first and move on with your life.Many women would not have had the strength you had and I applaud you for it. Honestly, I would like to think that I would have been able to do what you did. I wish you nothing but the best in your future and I am sure you will meet a wondeful man who is deserving of you because you won't settle for less.

That which does not kill us, only makes us stronger. Innocent

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march_2007 , virginia , caribbean , october_2010 , illinois_chicago
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FrancieElaine Posts : 655 Registered: 6/26/09
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 6:30 PM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

I am so very proud of you. I know it was probably the most difficult thing you ever had to do, but you did the best thing for you and your child. This is the way I want my daughters to grow up.. to be strong and independent like you. Hugs. Francie

Francie Elaine, The Bride Whisperer

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virginia , north_carolina
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CatStandish Posts : 2,767 Registered: 6/20/08
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 7:01 PM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

God girl.....I am SOSO SO proud of you. It took strength. It took courage. And it took a strong sense of self worth to not only not marry him on that day, but also have the party and have the fun. I am really truly proud of you for doing that for yourself. For putting yourself first. I wish I had had that courage 14 years ago, but I am so glad to know someone who does have that courage today.

You GO girl! You rock.

I hope you got pictures....because I am sure it was a beautiful unwedding and you were a beautiful hostess!

Misty

virginia , september_2009
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BirdLover Posts : 2,835 Registered: 3/30/06
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 7:55 PM Go to message in response to: CatStandish

I am having trouble remembering all of your story, but I do think I remember bits and pieces of it...and I am so proud of you for having the strength to do what you know needed to be done. You and Bally are definitely great role models.
Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker

virginia , september_2009
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auntofthebride Posts : 9,357 Registered: 4/2/06
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Posted: Oct 28, 2009 11:21 PM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

Dear DCT,

I'm in tears. Happiness.

I've been so worried about you. I think I mentioned, before, that I broke my first engagement over my then-boyfriend's use of illegal drugs. It's been 35 years since, and I still give thanks to My Maker that I did what I did.

I am so happy you did the same thing. Really, truly, I am so glad. Please believe me, you will never regret it. You totally did the right thing.

Wow, just wow.

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kennysoldwife Posts : 3,862 Registered: 4/28/07
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Posted: Oct 29, 2009 7:56 AM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

Hi Dream your dreams will come true you just have to dream new ones. You did a very brave thing and the right thing for you and your son. Take this time and take your time. Get to know you figure out what makes you tick. Figure out what you want out of life. What will make you be the best you, you can be.

Then once you have all of that figured out. Decide what you want in your life partner and then and only then find him. You are young, you have your whole life ahead of you and you have that beautiful little boy who is depending on you to do what is best for him.

If you are meant to have a husband you will. If not make sure you are happy with you. A husband should compliment and enhance your life not threaten it in any way. I wish you all the best because you deserve it.

 

 

 

Kenny and me perfect together, 10 years and counting

Sucks to be you, So glad I am me

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october_1997 , virginia , southern_shore_new_jersey
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Lilmisssouthern... Posts : 658 Registered: 8/12/08
Re: Updated
Posted: Oct 29, 2009 9:06 AM Go to message in response to: kennysoldwife

Ladies Yall all brought a smile to my face :) I am glad i have some support!!!

Like I said yes the party idea was weird but it was worth it. I really had a blast. I am not focused on relationships right now. I am focused on school and my son.

I am glad I found out when I did instead of after we got married. It wasn't easy and I by no means want anyone to think it was but it was what needed to be done....


* Promises mean everything when they are made but as soon as they are broken they mean nothing*

october_1997 , virginia , southern_shore_new_jersey
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08divabride Posts : 832 Registered: 11/17/07
Re: Updated
Posted: Oct 29, 2009 9:49 AM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

Drm, you are definitely an inspiration! I admire you as a woman and a mother for doing what's best for you and your child.

I'm sure it wasn't easy, but you will find the man of your dreams, and I wish you and your son the best of luck!

 Lilypie - (8e8A)

october_1997 , september_2008 , virginia , southern_shore_new_jersey , georgia
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