have you heard of potluck reception?

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Exit99 Posts : 173 Registered: 3/31/07
have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Apr 21, 2007 6:14 PM

For those of you that are tight on the budge...i have heard of a reception where it is "potluck" style and then the bride and groom get to keep the nice dishes the food comes in....this would be good for easy options!

Live Laugh Love...and never stop

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EveT2007 Posts : 1,949 Registered: 8/31/06
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Apr 25, 2007 11:08 AM Go to message in response to: Exit99

Ah, so it's kind of a combination shower / reception?  I would only try this if your guest list is limited to family and very close friends, and you know that they all like to cook.  It would certainly be a change of pace from the overdone, monstrously expensive receptions that have become the norm here in the Northeast.
Eve T

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LizS Posts : 1,982 Registered: 3/30/06
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: May 4, 2007 3:51 PM Go to message in response to: Exit99

Wouldn't you end up with just a TON of serving dishes that didn't match?  I don't think I would like that myself.  But heck, it might work if they buy the dishes off your registery!

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Guest
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: May 15, 2007 2:40 AM Go to message in response to: Exit99

I agree with Eve, small gathering with close friends and family would work out successfully.. :)

 


Mrs Maclaine-Cross tobe in 8 months!

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immigrants Posts : 349 Registered: 4/24/07
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Jun 20, 2007 8:28 AM Go to message in response to: Exit99

I am the mother of a bride to be and I actually went to a wedding where it was a potluck reception. At first I thought you've got to be kidding but then when it came time to eat, the food was GREAT and I mean EVERYTHING WAS GREAT. This couple had their reception in the church gymnasium and all the food was provided by the concregation. This was the only one I have been to like that and I have never forgotten it I guess all that HOMEMADE FOOD was too GOOD to forget. I don't think you should do it if you are having a large wedding though. For a smaller wedding it would be fine but I would first check with your family to see if they would mind doing this. I do agree with the poster above on all the dishes being different. If you could maybe pick out a pattern on your regitry and they all bought a piece from your pattern and put the food in it that would be cool.

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Guest
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Jun 20, 2007 10:20 AM Go to message in response to: Exit99

It is an unusual idea and the invite wording would have to be carefully thought out.....but I do think it's a great idea.

 I would like to see more weddings like this.

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ArtBride Posts : 4,838 Registered: 5/9/07
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Jun 20, 2007 2:58 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I think it depends on your guests. As someone who hates cooking, I'd probably be pretty upset about being asked to bring a homemade dish to a wedding. I'm the girl who signs up to bring 'paper goods' for all the potlucks...

I honestly think it's asking a little too much, but that depends on your guests as well. I'd definately grumble if I was going to a wedding where I had to buy a shower gift, wedding gift, nice clothes, travel expenses, AND bring food! But of course I'd do it for my best friend or sister.

Having said that, I think it's cute for a very casual reception. You could do a picnic theme, or BBQ. Just be sure to give your guests that option of bringing 'paper goods' if they can't---I mean, if they don't have time to cook!

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myra Posts : 5,550 Registered: 3/28/06
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Jun 21, 2007 8:42 PM Go to message in response to: Exit99

It can be great for a gathering of close family and friends, but if I were not close to the couple, I'd find it a bit of an imposition. I have been to a wedding like this in grad school, for fellow students--as mentioned above, all of the food was great. But, I think it's a bit much to be asked to provide the food AND put it in a dish that is a gift for the bride and groom. I think it's enough if other people are catering your reception--don't push for another present (if they want to give it, they will. And, if you're registered, they can check and see what your taste is).

myra at www.classysassyweddings.com

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JayKayinlove Posts : 33 Registered: 1/22/09
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Jul 28, 2009 3:26 PM Go to message in response to: Exit99

you know potluck receptions are fine and they do have great food 'if ppl there can cook' i'm even helping my bff plan her reception like this but at no potluck i have ever heard of for a wedding or not do you get to keep the plates normaly their picked up by the person that brought it on the way out. Normaly they bring you a gift as well but they take thier serving ware home.

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acwilde Posts : 13 Registered: 7/25/09
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Jul 31, 2009 9:54 AM Go to message in response to: Exit99

i guess you already had your reception. congradulations!
but on the pot luck topic, mostly everyone has been saying that it is an imposition to guests that are not close firends and family members. but seriously, how much can everyone eat?
if you applied the pot luck requirement to only family memebers and close friends, and people you know love to cook and do things like this, then everyone wins. you still get your pot luck, and you're not making any of your guests feel uncomfortable. if all of your close friends and family bring a dish for 6-10 people, then everyone will have more than enough to eat.
i think pot luck is a great idea.
my fiance's mother, and four of her sisters are going to be cooking my meal for me, and it is going to look very pot-lucky by the end. it will still be great food, though, and it will cost a fraction of what a caterer would cost.

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auntofthebride Posts : 9,354 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Jul 31, 2009 11:57 AM Go to message in response to: acwilde

Dear AC,

Potlucks are appropriate for no-host type dinners. We have potluck dinners at the church all the time. We have some kind of occasion to celebrate (Thanksgiving, etc), and start with a potluck dinner.

Potlucks are not appropriate for a wedding. The hosts of the wedding and reception pay for all the food and drinks consumed by the guests.


What you are describing, where only close relatives prepare and bring the food, is a co-hosted reception. You don't "assign" people to bring food. You wait for them to offer.

Then, once you have a few offers, you talk with those who have offered so they can coordinate what they are bringing. This should only be done by close relatives or very very good friends.

Then, you issue the invitation in the names of the co-hosts:

"The Family of Homer Simpson and Marge Bouvier invite you to..."

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BBGF Posts : 66 Registered: 5/5/09
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Aug 1, 2009 7:31 PM Go to message in response to: Exit99

Ladies please remember to try to give advice not harsh comments on what type of people do things different then we would ourselves. I have been to two wedding receptions that were like that. The first was a close friend of mine but the only people who they asked to bring a dish was that of her family members not the entire guest list and I tell you the food was better than anything that I have ever tasted at any reception. The reception was done in a big blue barn as a country wedding. My friend is a city girl who married a country boy from Ohio. The wedding was done more city like and the reception was done as a big ho down. It was done buffet style and her family had gotten together to pick out the same serving dishes to have the food set out in. Seriously it was a lot of fun.The reason why they choose to do it that way because they couldn't fine caterers to fit their budget and the taste of food that they wanted for their reception. The other one that I attended was for a young couple that were both deaf and the bride had lost one of her parents a few months before the wedding and did not have the support of her other parent. The groom parents died when he was a child. They had know other family except for their two entire congregations which was the people who actually arranged the reception location and brought the food. I only knew of the details because my mother was an interpreter for the death and blind. I thought that it was unique and sweet and nothing about it was Marge or Hommer Simpson about it.

Let us showcase your unique style.

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auntofthebride Posts : 9,354 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Aug 1, 2009 8:15 PM Go to message in response to: BBGF

Dear BBGF,

Both situations you described were co-hosted receptions. Nothing wrong with that.

Bear in mind, this is a very old thread that has been recently revived. Rather than start a new thread, people will sometimes hook a new comment to an old thread. It's confusing.

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BBGF Posts : 66 Registered: 5/5/09
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Aug 2, 2009 12:38 AM Go to message in response to: auntofthebride

Well its not confusing if I was responding to all of the more recent comments that were posted in the later portion of July 2009.

Let us showcase your unique style.

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acwilde Posts : 13 Registered: 7/25/09
Re: have you heard of potluck reception?
Posted: Aug 4, 2009 11:57 AM Go to message in response to: auntofthebride

hello auntofthebride.
it seems that you have a very big "onyl one way to do a wedding" etiquette guide infront of you when you write these posts.
my mother was once married in a bar, in langerie, by a justice of the peace. a friend of mine was married on a horse and carriage. i had a cousin that was married in her back yard. i knew a girl that was married at a comic book convention. and one that had her entire wedding theme that of mickey mouse.
if i were to post threads about these weddings, i'm sure you have negative things to say about all of these weddings, too. but i would like to notify you of one thing: the bride and groom thought of the weddings, they put them together, and were very happy when they were done. to criticise someone because they are different than you is wrong. there is nothing wrong with a pot luck wedding if none of the people involved think there is anything wrong with it. there is no such thing as a right way to do things when it comes to weddings. except if you listen to what other people tell you, instead of your own instinct and desires.
weddings are supposed to be unique, not cookie-cut. and every bride and groom are completely different from the next. it would be nice if you stopped judging people's ideas based on your own biases, and looked at things from other people's perspectives, instead of your own.
cheers and have a great day!

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