What do I do??

Online Users: 1,262 guest(s), 2 user(s). Replies: 10

badmistake Posts : 1 Registered: 6/11/09
What do I do??
Posted: Jun 11, 2009 4:31 PM

Help - I need advice!

A good friend is getting married in 3 weeks, here in the town I live in. I have been working with her on planning her wedding, even designed her invitations and programs. No, I am not in the wedding - she has 6 bridesmaids and I am not one of them. But she's a very good friend nonetheless.

Here's my dilemma... I already responded "yes" for my husband and I on the rsvp card - no brainer, of course we are going to attend. Last week, we found a great deal on a vacation, and booked air and hotel in a rash, stupid decision, without double-checking the calendar. It took me 3 days to realize the mistake - that we had booked the vacation for my good friend's wedding weekend. Now, my husband and I have been trying to get out of the vacation, but unfortunately the air and hotel are both "non-refundable, non-transferable", meaning that we can't even move the reservations to different dates! Basically, we are out $700 if we attend my friend's wedding. I'm prepared to sacrifice the money to keep our friendship, and my husband agrees that we probably do need to be at the wedding - it is important. But this was going to be our only vacation this summer, and losing $700 means that we will not be taking another one.

HELP!! What would you do?

Reply


lori83 Posts : 1,852 Registered: 3/30/06
Re: What do I do??
Posted: Jun 11, 2009 4:36 PM Go to message in response to: badmistake

I would go to the wedding.

Reply

RachelRamirez1259 Posts : 12 Registered: 5/13/09
Re: What do I do??
Posted: Jun 11, 2009 4:56 PM Go to message in response to: badmistake

I think it would be hard... but I think you should go to the wedding, if she really is that good of a friend. A friendship should be worth more than $700 (don't get me wrong, $700 is a lot of money to me too! lol). OR maybe you could talk to her about it, maybe she'd be more understanding than you think.....

Reply


PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,446 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: What do I do??
Posted: Jun 11, 2009 5:08 PM Go to message in response to: badmistake

I'd go to the wedding.

 

 

 

Reply


FutureMrsDJLeo Posts : 615 Registered: 2/26/09
Re: What do I do??
Posted: Jun 12, 2009 1:09 AM Go to message in response to: badmistake

Can you sell your vacation to someone?

Reply


auntofthebride Posts : 9,354 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: What do I do??
Posted: Jun 12, 2009 7:17 AM Go to message in response to: FutureMrsDJLeo

Dear Mrs JD,

"Can you sell your vacation to someone?"

The tickets are non-transferable, which means the person named on the ticket has to be the one who flies.

I would go to the wedding. The OP will not enjoy the vacation, due to the overwhelming sense of guilt. It's a $700 lesson in "think before you click".

Reply


CoutureBride27 Posts : 130 Registered: 5/5/09
Re: What do I do??
Posted: Jun 12, 2009 8:26 AM Go to message in response to: badmistake

Hi, you need to determine which one is the most important (and remember, weddings are a once in a lifetime experience - vacation you could always go next year)! To be honest, if you're my friend and you cancelled your plans to attend my wedding for a vacation, our friendship will be o-v-e-r.


Cherish all your happy moments:  they make a fine cushion for old age.

**Christopher Morley**

Reply


WinterBride6602 Posts : 33 Registered: 4/13/09
Re: What do I do??
Posted: Jun 12, 2009 8:34 AM Go to message in response to: badmistake

I would def. go to the wedding, but can't you just fly out to your vacation spot the day after the wedding, and just lose a day? Sure you'd have to buy new airefare, but at least you won't be losing out on all the cash you put down.

Reply

somedaysoon Posts : 32 Registered: 5/18/09
Re: What do I do??
Posted: Jun 12, 2009 12:08 PM Go to message in response to: WinterBride6602

i know this sounds super horrible, but i might consider going on the vacation. i guess it depends on what $700 is to you (and just how close this friend is). for me, i could probably take or leave the vacation. but if $700 was months worth of saving for my once a year vacation, i don't know that i could eat that amount. if you don't think that your friend would understand the oversight (again, this will sound horrible), try blaming the slip up on your husband (assuming she is more your friend than his). you could say he planned the trip as a surprise or booked it before he told you the dates and you are both so so sorry but cannot afford to lose the $. again, i only recommend this if losing $700 is truly a great loss for you. still send a present, maybe something extra special as an apology for not being able to make it. either way, tell her sooner than later as she has planned a guest list with you on it. good luck with your decision.

Reply


SteffMay2009 Posts : 383 Registered: 10/22/08
Re: What do I do??
Posted: Jun 12, 2009 1:46 PM Go to message in response to: somedaysoon

I would be very hurt as a bride if one of my close friends who helped me through the planning process went on vacation instead of coming to my wedding. I'm not sure I could forgive that.
You could at least call the airline and see if they can transfer for a fee (we changed non-refundable tickets for $150). Hotels are usually okay with changing the date as long as you still go. The only catch might be because it was such a good deal, the difference in price may be higher, but it's worth a shot.


Reply

simplebride2 Posts : 33 Registered: 4/17/09
Re: What do I do??
Posted: Jun 12, 2009 3:34 PM Go to message in response to: SteffMay2009

I agree with the OP, book a oneway flight for as soon as the wedding is over and just miss a little vacation time and pay a bit more for tickets.

Reply
RSS

Thank You
for Signing Up!

Check your e-mail inbox for the latest updates from brides.com

Give a Subscription to Brides Magazine as a Gift
Subscribe to Brides magazine