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Can this work?

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Waiting2baSmith Posts : 16 Registered: 1/13/09
Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 4:02 PM

Okay I really need some help, and this may sound really stupid because all of the signs point to "no it can't work" but I figured I would ask. So here goes...


My parents are paying for our wedding (which I am so grateful for) So my dad has decided to set our wedding budget at $15,000 which I feel is more than enough for one day. Problem is... The venue that my mother and I are completely in love with is....close to $8,000! That DOES include a lot of extra perks and what not, but not food or drinks or anything like that!


I have looked at all sorts of "wedding budget worksheets" and if I am doing that math correctly a $15,000 budget allows for like $6,000 for the reception and that included food, drinks, decoration, etc. (for an average wedding)


Obviously since we have 2 years before we get married we have plenty of time to shop around and get deals and things like that, but we are just wondering, can we use this venue and still afford other things?!?!


We have not put anything down on this place yet. We are still shopping around for good deals and a place that is cheaper, I just thought I would ask!


Thanks for any advice ladies!


wedding tickers

june_2011 , virginia
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DoesntPlayNice Posts : 809 Registered: 12/17/08
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 4:19 PM Go to message in response to: Waiting2baSmith

For $8000 what else are they offering? For just $2000 more I had a venue that included food, cake, DJ and drinks for 100 people.

Previously Posted as Military Bride.

CEO of E.N.E.M.A. (Enemy Negotiations & Extraction Military Agency) A special Division of P.O.O.P. (People Offended by Offended People)

When POOP can't do it alone....they call for the ENEMA.

june_2011 , virginia , may_2009 , texas
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MagicalMomentsP... Posts : 742 Registered: 3/6/06
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 4:24 PM Go to message in response to: Waiting2baSmith

Hello,

Congratulations on your engagement and upcoming wedding. The most important thing to understand about the wedding budget calculators is they are just guidelines. As such you are completely free to adjust the budget based on your own priorities. So if the calculator says you should pay about $6K for your reception and you pay $9K, then you will have to spend less on other items.

As your wedding is not for another two years, another option you can consider is to pay for the increase yourself. If you can save about $20 per week over the next two years, you'll be able to make up the $2000 difference. It will be upto you as to what to sacrifice in order to save an additional $20 per week. But in the end it is doable but you are the one who is going to have to make it work.

Howard Kier, Certified Professional Wedding Photographer

Magical Moments Photography


june_2011 , virginia
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starfish701 Posts : 465 Registered: 12/10/08
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 4:50 PM Go to message in response to: MagicalMomentsP...

I found that most budget calculators suggested a reception venue should cost $2000. I'm not sure where you are from but where I live it is almost impossible to find a nice place for so little. Before you decide look place in your budget to cut spending (do you really need engraved invitations and STD cards?) I agree with the PP, if you save just a little every month for the next two years you could but a bit of money towards the wedding of your dreams.

june_2011 , virginia
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Waiting2baSmith Posts : 16 Registered: 1/13/09
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 5:37 PM Go to message in response to: starfish701

Wow, I feel like such a loser! Why didn't I think of the idea of FH and I making up the difference! Wow! Thanks so much ladies!


wedding tickers

june_2011 , virginia
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kennysoldwife Posts : 3,862 Registered: 4/28/07
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 5:58 PM Go to message in response to: Waiting2baSmith

I would still like to know what you are getting for $8000 if you are not getting food or anything else?I paid for my entire wedding including my gown, and tux rental for my son. food, photographer, cake and DJ for less than that.

 

 

 

Kenny and me perfect together, 10 years and counting

Sucks to be you, So glad I am me

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october_1997 , june_2011 , virginia , southern_shore_new_jersey
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simplebride2 Posts : 33 Registered: 4/17/09
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 7:16 PM Go to message in response to: Waiting2baSmith

It also depends on how many guests you plan to have. The price of catering depends on the number of people eating/drinking.

june_2011 , virginia , september_2009 , minnesota
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auntofthebride Posts : 9,357 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 7:18 PM Go to message in response to: Waiting2baSmith

Dear Mrs S,

Let me get this straight. You have $15,000 for your budget (plus whatever you might be able to save), and the location ALONE is $8,000? You now propose a whopping $7,000 for all the other expenses: Food, drink, dress, attendants presents, hair, makeup, flowers, limo, DJ, etc.

You can certainly get good deals on all these other items. You can buy a dress off eBay, use an iPod playlist instead of a DJ, and so forth.

But stop to think for a second. How will you feel wearing a secondhand dress in this fabulous setting? How will you feel serving bargain cuts of chicken to your guests? Are you prepared for a guest thinking to themselves "Great surroundings, but horrible food."

My suggestion to you is to re-think in terms of your entire budget and what portion of that budget will go to each line item.

As Howard suggested, you can certainly make up some of the difference with your own savings. Your wedding isn't for another two years; that's plenty of time to build up a lot of money with a small weekly savings plan.

I still wonder about spending more than half your entire budget on JUST the location. If that included all the food and drink, it would be a different story.

If you were my daughter, I'd suggest you "reconsider". Maybe keep that really great location in mind for an anniversary party sometime in the future when you and your husband are making a lot of money.

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PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,462 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 7:42 PM Go to message in response to: Waiting2baSmith

I do want to know WHAT you are getting for $8000. Just curious.

 

 

 

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MagicalMomentsP... Posts : 742 Registered: 3/6/06
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 7:46 PM Go to message in response to: Waiting2baSmith


Wow, I feel like such a loser! Why didn't I think of the idea of FH and I making up the difference! Wow! Thanks so much ladies!

The last I looked, I'm certainly no lady!



Howard Kier, Certified Professional Wedding Photographer

Magical Moments Photography

june_2011 , virginia
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myra Posts : 5,555 Registered: 3/28/06
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 7:47 PM Go to message in response to: Waiting2baSmith

$8,000! That DOES include a lot of extra perks and what not, but not food or drinks or anything like that!

Can you explain what the "perks and what not" include? Are there flowers, linens, ceremony setup, special chairs, cake cutting--what?! I have heard of places setting a minimum (ie. you must spend at least $8000 in catering on a Saturday night in order to use the place), but there would have to be a lot of perks to make someplace worth $8000 just for, basically, a site fee. The typical budget breakdown allows about 50% for the reception--that means place, food, drinks, tips, insurance, etc. The other 50% goes for things like clothing, paper and printing, music, photography, flowers and decor, officiant, etc. So, on a budget of $15,000, that site fee is way out of line.
myra at www.classysassyweddings.com

june_2011 , virginia
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HappyGirl13 Posts : 1,300 Registered: 4/21/08
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 9:40 PM Go to message in response to: myra

Yes, more info please, like Myra said. I forgot to look at what region of the country you're from, but I'm in the Los Angeles area (so it's expensive compared to lots of other parts of the country), and we had our wedding at a beautiful place that's in-demand for weddings and paid only $2300 for the site fee for our daytime wedding, which included a valet and a DJ. And since it was a restaurant (yes, we got married at a restaurant, technically, but it's a restaurant with a BEAUTIFUL outdoor patio), we didn't have to rent chairs and tables.

So find out what that includes and we'll be able to better give you advice on the budget. BTW if you're willing to do a daytime wedding or have the wedding on a less popular day (Friday nite?), you may be able to get the site for cheaper. You might want to check on that.

preview image

 

 

 

 

june_2011 , virginia , march_2008 , southern_california
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auntofthebride Posts : 9,357 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 10:55 PM Go to message in response to: MagicalMomentsP...

Dear Howard,

We females have gone through a lifetime of hearing that "men" refers to us, too.

"Men working"
"Firemen"
"Policemen"
"Chairman"
"God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen"
"Peace on earth and goodwill to men"

I don't have a problem with "Ladies" including you, macho as you must be.

Look at it this way. We think so highly of you that we are considering you an Honorary Lady. Howard, my friend, you are now part of the Sisterhood. Congratulations. You get your very own pair of pantyhose and a box of Tampax.

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Waiting2baSmith Posts : 16 Registered: 1/13/09
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 27, 2009 11:59 PM Go to message in response to: auntofthebride

First off, sorry for the whole "Ladies" thing. I was on my way out the door, so I only glanced at the post and responded quickly, hence the reason my last post did not really clear anything up.

So here goes...
As for other cost (and cost we are cutting)
My mom has decided that she wants to buy my dress and everything to go with it so that will not come out of the budget.
FH and I are saving saving saving! We want to try to contribute as much as possible.
No parties or showers (Bach, Bridal, engagement, ect.) will come out of the budget. FH aunts are doing them for us! smile
Wedding cake will not come out of the budget. FMIL does wedding cakes, so she is doing it for us! (FREE)

The venue includes... Ceremony and reception, DJ (for both), Honeymoon suite (night of wedding), Valet parking, Linens, Wedding planner, A few decorations like cake stand, card box, candles, toasting glasses, breakfast the next day for us and our parents before we depart, all the tables and chairs for reception, chairs for the ceremony, large tent for the reception, and the dance floor. We can also use the site for a rehearsal dinner the night before for no extra charge and the DJ will be there for that free of charge as well (but we would have to provide the food)

We live in Virginia. And we are planning on inviting 150 people.

Do you think maybe it would be a better idea for us to look at catering prices first? I just felt like geeze I'm already looking at the sites we like WAY in advance so I thought talking to a caterer was WAY too soon. But I guess there is no harm in talking to them to get prices. Right? My mom and I are completely clueless about this whole wedding planning thing. Good thing we have 2 years!

I hope that clears some things up! Thanks for the advice from everyone! It is so helpful
wedding tickers

june_2011 , virginia
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PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,462 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: Can this work?
Posted: May 28, 2009 12:15 AM Go to message in response to: Waiting2baSmith

Definitely look at catering prices first. Make appointments, go to the caterers, try the food. My cousin saved on catering but at the price of the food not being great. Make sure the food is good.

Honestly, depending on the food costs, the venue really may not be that inclusive.

Also, find out if the venue recommends any caterers - some caterers may have arrangements with the venue and offer discounted prices.

Ask - it can't hurt.

EDIT: Also, how many people are you looking at? My venue in NJ was about 100/person, with tax - it was at a hotel, included a 1 hour cocktail hour and 4 hour reception w/dinner (4 hour open bar between the cocktail hour and reception), the flowers, the cake, a limo, a separate cocktail hour for the WP, a suite for us that night, transportation to the airport, & a wedding planner. This included all the set up, the linens, chairs, etc.

Our DJ and photographer were not included. We had about ~140 people at ~$100/person with tax. This worked well for us.

I think if you can look at your costs per person, you have a much better idea of the actual cost.




Edited by: PharmToxGirl on May 28, 2009 12:15 AM

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