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Online Users: 1,289 guest(s), 0 user(s). Replies: 28

Bride2BeN2009 Posts : 27 Registered: 1/4/08
Deleted
Posted: Apr 18, 2009 10:26 PM

deleted

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brownegirl Posts : 523 Registered: 10/14/08
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 18, 2009 10:41 PM Go to message in response to: Bride2BeN2009

I am all for the idea of a small, intimate wedding but I don't think it is polite to elope and still expect your parents to help you to pay for a home. I think, given your situation, you can either plan on having your parents there at the JP with you or plan to pay for the new house on your own.

Hope this helps you make your decision.

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Knoxvegas Posts : 951 Registered: 9/12/07
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 18, 2009 11:07 PM Go to message in response to: Bride2BeN2009

No matter what, this is your moment. I would include at least your parents because they have so generously taken the money you probably would have gotten for a wedding and put it towards your house instead. Buying a home is a big step that one usually does when you can do it yourself, so parental help is way above and beyond.

 

"Love is not a matter of counting the years -- it's making the years count."

-Wolfman Jack Smith

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auntofthebride Posts : 9,354 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 19, 2009 9:56 AM Go to message in response to: Bride2BeN2009

Dear LTB,

"So, you don't need me there at your wedding, but you still want my money to be part of your future life?"

Hint: Invite the parents to go with you to the JP. Got siblings? Give some real consideration to inviting them, as well.

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BirdLover Posts : 2,834 Registered: 3/30/06
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 19, 2009 5:27 PM Go to message in response to: auntofthebride

Unless your parents have offered to put the money towads something OTHER than a wedding, I personally think it would be pretty rude to ask them to contribute to a house. I'm not saying that to be mean, but that is my personal opinion.

My parents paid for my wedding, but that's because they wanted to pay for my WEDDING. If I had forgone the wedding, they would NOT have given me the money towards a house. It's not what they wanted to pay for.


Lilypie Expecting a baby Ticker

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CatStandish Posts : 2,766 Registered: 6/20/08
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 19, 2009 8:14 PM Go to message in response to: BirdLover

I just love it when they delete their posts because they don't get the answer they are looking for.

Misty

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kennysoldwife Posts : 3,859 Registered: 4/28/07
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 19, 2009 8:25 PM Go to message in response to: CatStandish

Now see I might have agreed with her. I might have said your parents owe you a house. They should give you the half the cost of a four bedroom colonial as a gift because you are their child. Now I can't say that because she deleted her original post.

 

 

 

Kenny and me perfect together, 10 years and counting

Sucks to be you, So glad I am me

Proud Member of P.O.O.P,  People Offended by Offended People

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BirdLover Posts : 2,834 Registered: 3/30/06
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 19, 2009 9:11 PM Go to message in response to: kennysoldwife

That's a buzz-kill

Lilypie Expecting a baby Ticker

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brownegirl Posts : 523 Registered: 10/14/08
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 19, 2009 11:39 PM Go to message in response to: BirdLover

What I hate is that she didn't seem to take what we said to heart at all. She just got pissed and deleted it. What is the point of asking for advice if you get all offended when you get it.

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BirdLover Posts : 2,834 Registered: 3/30/06
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 20, 2009 12:27 AM Go to message in response to: brownegirl

I don't get it either.

I mean, I posted what I did because she might not have thought about the fact that maybe her parents were ONLY interested in contributing to a wedding, like my parents. Some people are fine paying big bucks for one thing, but not one penny on another. I didn't call her an idiot or a jerk or anything :S

Lilypie Expecting a baby Ticker

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cyndi33 Posts : 2,585 Registered: 1/3/07
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 20, 2009 6:30 PM Go to message in response to: BirdLover

Well, here's waht DH and I would do. We would not pay for the house. we would pay toward a wedding. But there's a limit, and anything beyond that is on them or other sets of parents. And with the boys, we're willing to pay less than with the 3 girls. This will likely cause issues with DH's daughter (and her mom) but it's the way we're handling it. But buying a house? No. Helping move? Maybe, but pay for it, we're one of those families who would contribute to a wedding but not to buying a house.

Wish I could of read the OP though. I HATE when they do taht!!!

 Proud Member of P.O.O.P.,  People Offended by Offended People

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kelleyiskelley Posts : 11,590 Registered: 7/2/06
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 20, 2009 6:50 PM Go to message in response to: cyndi33

AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!! WTH??? What was the freakin question? I really loathe deleters!!!

Check out the Wedding Planner Buzz and My Blog @ www.myaislerunner.com  

Co-Founder and Proud Member of P.O.O.P - People Offended by Offended People.

"Children are just like adults, minus the crushing failure." - Stephen Colbert

  

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brownegirl Posts : 523 Registered: 10/14/08
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 20, 2009 7:01 PM Go to message in response to: kelleyiskelley

To paraphrase:

OP wanted her parents to take the money they planned to contribute to a wedding and use it to help them buy a house. However, she didn't want to invite her parents to the ceremony at the court house or JP. She wanted opinions/ advice. She got a whole set of opinions/ advice she didn't like.

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kelleyiskelley Posts : 11,590 Registered: 7/2/06
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 20, 2009 7:11 PM Go to message in response to: brownegirl

Thanks Browne! Jeez - overdramatic arent we OP? Was deleting your post really necessary?

No post = no advice from me lol. So instead Ill just use this time to tell Browne the following; everytime I see your screenname, I for some reason read it as "brownie" and it immediately makes me hungry for chocolate. So thanks for that lol.

Check out the Wedding Planner Buzz and My Blog @ www.myaislerunner.com  

Co-Founder and Proud Member of P.O.O.P - People Offended by Offended People.

"Children are just like adults, minus the crushing failure." - Stephen Colbert

  

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brownegirl Posts : 523 Registered: 10/14/08
Re: Elopement
Posted: Apr 20, 2009 7:22 PM Go to message in response to: kelleyiskelley

LOL. I love brownies. I had a particularly good one on Saturday. I chose the name in part because of a novel I love Brown Girl in The Ring by Nalo Hopkinson. Thanks for the laugh.

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