as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?

Online Users: 1,291 guest(s), 3 user(s). Replies: 25


StephanieMay10 Posts : 11 Registered: 12/22/08
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 15, 2009 4:39 PM Go to message in response to: StephanieMay10

Thank you everyone. I now feel more confident about not providing favors.

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LinzZ Posts : 683 Registered: 12/13/07
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 15, 2009 5:07 PM Go to message in response to: StephanieMay10

I know I've posted this before but here was my reasoning for NOT doing favors.
1. Favors are a new thing. My mom and aunts didn't do them in the 80s, my mom's cousins didn't do them in the 90s either. So why, all of a sudden, are we doing them with a feeling that we HAVE to have them?

2. How much do most people spend on making/ buying their favors? Lets say you average just $1 per favor (cookies, packaging, bows, etc). If you have 100 guests, that's $100 you're spending on making sure each guest gets a cookie (because for $1 they aren't getting a couple cookies). Are your guests really going to appreciate a cookie enough to justify spending $100? You could use that to upgrade your filling or flavor of your cake or go with the more expensive design/ baker, pay the DJ for another hour, you could put another $10 towards EACH centerpiece (if you had 10 tables for your 100 guests), you could possibly uprade your bar, buy a few more prints from your photographer, upgrade your album, or any number of other things. My wedding had $200 guests. Think what you could do with $200 extra!

3. Even edible favors get left behind. Use cookies for example. Think how many people will leave their cookie because they're full, they're on a diet, they don't like sugar cookies (or whatever you have), etc. Some people will forget them. It's a waste.

I have yet to see a favor I actually wanted (my mother has said the same). No one complained about the lack of favors at my wedding.

 

Cherish Yesterday, Dream for Tomorrow, Live Today!

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BrighterThanSun... Posts : 853 Registered: 10/17/08
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 15, 2009 5:18 PM Go to message in response to: LinzZ

Actually, in response to Linzz, favours are usually more than a dollar as well. So actually, you would be saving more than 100 dollars by cutting it out (if there was 100 guests).

I have never taken a favour home from a wedding, and now that I think about it I feel quite badly. They spent money on them and I just ignore them (oops). Sometimes I don't even notice that they are there or just forget. Actually, I think once I took a favour that was chocolate truffles.

Anyways, nobody cares. At least, most people don't.

Some people do favours instead of an open bar. Honestly, I would rather have a few drinks then take home a keychain with a plastic flip flop on it with the wedding date printed on it...I already have a keychain...or a photoframe with a wedding date on it, I'm most likely not going to put a picture of the couple in it...but would feel weird putting a family photo in it...so therefore I would leave it behind or probably lose it somehow.

Sure, people might want to give a special thanks to their guests, but you are providing them with food, drinks and entertainment for the night, I think that will suffice.

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LinzZ Posts : 683 Registered: 12/13/07
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 15, 2009 5:51 PM Go to message in response to: BrighterThanSun...

BrighterThanSunshine, I completely agree. Even as I was typing up my explaination I kept thinking, I'm lowballing it with $1.00, but I think it helped make the point that even a really inexpensive favor can add up and those funds could be used elsewhere.

{color:#ff0099}Cherish Yesterday, Dream for Tomorrow, Live Today!

{color}

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TanisJ Posts : 2,669 Registered: 4/25/07
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 15, 2009 6:00 PM Go to message in response to: LinzZ

As a bride I didn't have them, as a guest I wouldn't miss them and as an event planner I tell brides that they will care way, way more about their favors than any guest ever will. No offence to anyone who is having favors. They can add to the theme, taste yummy or be a momento. I would say though for those who favour favors please make them smaller than the average evening bag! Especially since most women at a wedding who are with husbands, boyfriends or any other type of male guest will probably end up putting not one but two favors into their evening bag, which is often smaller than their day time purses. I think this is probably the #1 reason for left behind favors.

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Soon2BMrsPorkChop Posts : 73 Registered: 1/1/09
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 17, 2009 4:07 AM Go to message in response to: nearlymrsn

As I was scrolling down the responses, I was totally thinking that while most favors you get are only nice to look at for a total of 5 seconds, I would still think it odd not to get one. However, I was going to suggest that you make one small donation to charity, and then let your guests know that you chose to do that instead of providing favors. I see that someone else already suggested that, and I think its a fab idea. As a guest who doesn't need anymore junk in her room, I would totally love seeing that rather than another useless crystal ice bucket, or a box of those white almond candies! Anyway, the only useful favor I ever got at a wedding was a lovely serving dish from Mikasa, but since I'm 25 and live at home, I just use it to hold pots of eyeshadow lol. And who can even afford to give away Mikasa?!

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AngeArmani Posts : 56 Registered: 3/29/09
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 17, 2009 10:31 PM Go to message in response to: StephanieMay10

I can't remember the last time I saw any favors given out...It's been a while...as a guest.

All the best,
Angela Armani


My very own personal blog! It's all about cake toppers! weird huh?

http://ultimateweddingtopperguide.blogspot.com/

Please do! I'm interested in your thoughts!
Laughing

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luckymebride Posts : 125 Registered: 12/7/08
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 17, 2009 11:08 PM Go to message in response to: StephanieMay10

I actually like favors, I always thought there is something elegant about it...that's why I'm all for the favors for my wedding. However, I have been to weddings with no favors which it was not a big deal at all!!!

wedding web site

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CatStandish Posts : 2,766 Registered: 6/20/08
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 19, 2009 4:23 PM Go to message in response to: luckymebride

I did them for my first wedding in 1995. At that time, they were almost universally matchbooks. I gave out bookmarks (XH and I met at a bookstore)

That being said... 90% of the favors today are candy or food items. Personally, I don't feel those are favors. I'm not a big 'disposable gift' type of person -- so I do not care for receiving food for gifts. I like little cups with M&Ms in them, don't get me wrong -- but it's not a "favor" to me. I mean...when we were in college and went to parties (sorority, not fraternity. huge difference), there were favors -- t-shirts or cups with the name of the event on it. High school, same thing (but I went to a weird high school, so this is not comparable). To me, a favor is a KEEPSAKE.

So, to my mind, a lot of weddings do not have favors, and I'm good with that. Firstly, I don't want a tshirt about your wedding, though I'd like a coffee cup. Both are pricey. I don't need shot glasses...I don't drink. Same is true of wine glasses, corkscrews, etc. I prefer to pick out my own salt and pepper shakers, etc. I love bookmarks, personally, and buy them endlessly. And I am a pen FIEND. If someone gave me a pen at their wedding, I'd be in 7th heaven. That being said...I'm weird <G>

We're doing mix CDs, and they will end up costing about $1 each when all is said and done. We're going to put a mix of Celtic, Swing, and 80s on there -- it will be a sort of 'greatest hits of the wedding reception' compilation. And some will like it, and some will not. I'm sure most will listen to it at least once (i would, were I a guest who received it). Both FH and I are known for making Mix CDs for people -- I do this every year at Christmas and people anticipate it as their first Christmas music of the year (since they get it the Monday after turkey.... or the week of turkey...they get it close to turkey). It's something we do, and it suits our personalities.

Ditch the favors first. Sure, they are nice, but a lot of times, the NICE nice ones... are a bit pricey for the budget bride. I would not be hurt if you did not give me a favor.

Misty

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carebearny1999 Posts : 1,253 Registered: 9/21/07
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 19, 2009 4:56 PM Go to message in response to: CatStandish

Misty my Dh would LOVE your CD!
We did soap, a few were left behind, but it was a useful favor. Most of my guests are complaining that theirs are finally gone! LOL I guess it's time for me to make more and sell them to them this time!

 

Proud member POOP - People Offended by Offended People

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RACR Posts : 52 Registered: 3/18/08
Re: as a guest...how do you feel about no favors?
Posted: Apr 20, 2009 1:27 PM Go to message in response to: StephanieMay10

As a guest I could care less about favors - I never even take them from showers! I think the only people who would maybe miss them are more traditional people or the little old ladies who like the momentos. If you are cutting costs this is definitely the place to do it. We are not doing favors either but instead made a donation to our favorite charity in FI's grandparents' name.

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