Hi girls.... I need a little help. My Fiance's father passed away in August of '07, and his mother is very very ill- to the point that she can't walk really and is mostly bed ridden. She has been in the hospital since before Christmas, but we are hoping soon she will be moved to a rehab facility. However I'm not sure if she will be moving back home anytime soon.
Anyway, it is a really complicated and sad situation. After meeting with the DJ last night and discussing all of the different traditions/announcements/logistics, I think it really hit FH how tough this is going to be for him. He does have grandparents that will be there. I have both parents and two sets of grandparents. We are both worried about his mom even making it to the wedding, let alone feeling alright and not having to leave right after the ceremony.
My dillemma is making her feel included without making her uncomfortable.... trying to figure out everything from getting her down the aisle/announcing her at the reception/dances (she obv won't be able to dance but would it be wrong to have him dance with his grandma?). Basically everything! Is there anyone else dealing with the same sort of situation? How are you dealing with things?
I am not in the same situation, but I can understand how tough this will be for your FH. I will be walking down the aisle alone, with a picture of my dad (who died when I was 12) wrapped around my flowers so I'll still feel like he is walking me down in a way.
People will understand his mom is sick, and you do whatever makes you, FH, and MIL most comfortable. Whether that be having a 5 second dance, not walking down the aisle, whatever works -- there are no set rules to weddings, her being there will be blessing enough.
Great date, btw - you're getting married on my birthday! I pray his mom will be ok for the wedding, but if not, just try to make some special accomodations for her, its not every day your son gets married, I'm sure its a big deal to her too!
Tasha ~ November 2009 Bride to be ~
Marrying the Man of my Dreams!
10 Years as Friends; 7 years in Madly in Love, Engaged for 2 - Its about time and we are so ready!
I think the best thing to do would be to talk to FMIL face to face and see what she is most comfortable doing. It might be best, for example, for her to just stay in a wheelchair the entire evening. That way she won't expend energy walking around.
The traditional MOG trip down the aisle can be done with her escort pushing her wheelchair, for example.
It's very possible she won't know how she feels until the actual day of the ceremony. Let her tell you what she wants or needs that day.