So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????

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m2810 Posts : 45 Registered: 11/17/07
So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 3:32 PM

Hello, it's been a while since i've posted on here but I really need some advice.

Here's my little problem.
I got married a year ago and 3 1/2 weeks before we got married he got laid off. And for our honeymoon we were supposed to go to Mexico to spen time alone but we were also going to stop to visit family. However, we were unable to go becaase of the financial issue.
But out of this whole year he's only worked 3 months.It hasn't affected us to much yet since I have a great paying job. But in October he got a great job oppurtunity with a gov't program that would start soon (so they said). They said they were looking to hire 100ppl and he would make a good candidate, So we've been waiting to here from them for 2 months and nothing!!

So a month ago we found out that both his grandparents and mine were very ill and my parents informed us that they would be driving there this month for 2 1/2 weeks and if we were interested in going we could join them at no cost.They would be leaving ont he 20th of this month and returning the 7th of Jan. So we were really excited and accepted!

However, they just called DH out nowher to take a class had trainig toay and I told him to get all the info. Well idk what's wrong with these ppl but they can't give him ANY information as to when training or the actual job is going to start the only thing they keep saying is it's guna start soon and more than likely in Jan but THATS it!! And he told them our situation and asked what would be the consequences if we go and he gets called back while we're gone? And the lady just said "that's up to you if you want to take that risk".

So we're stuck!! What if we go and he gets called and loses this job oppurtunity or what if we don't go and won't HAVE THE CHANCE TO GO FOR MAYBE 5YEARS??


If you were in my situation what would you do?? Thanks!!

Sorry So Long!!

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Nalamienea Posts : 2,924 Registered: 6/13/08
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 3:51 PM Go to message in response to: m2810

Umm... I don't think I'd want to work for people who string you out like that. It sounds like they don't have their act together at ALL. Is there any other way to check up on these people and what kind of job your husband would be doing? That's so incredibly unprofessional of them.



10/26/08 


 


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mrspinky Posts : 3,773 Registered: 3/14/08
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 5:14 PM Go to message in response to: m2810

m2810 - I'm not sure I'd like my Hubby working for a company like that. If it were US in OUR financial situation, I'd leave and try to find a different job for Hubby.

Mrs. Pinky



Our Wedding Website 

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MrsM2009 Posts : 422 Registered: 3/16/08
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 5:19 PM Go to message in response to: m2810

I think she said it's a gov't job, which explains the stringing along. Given that, I don't agree with the pp's. I live in D.C., and the federal government is notorious for stringing people along through the application and screening process, but once you get the job it's hard to get fired and the pay is often decent (depending on what you're doing - my friends in the gov't are lawyers). So for me, I'd say employment after a year of unemployment is not worth the risk of a vacation. I mean, we are talking about someone who has been unemployed for quite a while here - we're not talking about someone who has a job and is considering leaving it. The way the economy is right now, I'd take any chance you can get. Things aren't likely to improve in the near future. There's always time to take a vacation - I highly doubt you'd be waiting 5 years, especially with two incomes! That's what vacation time is for after you both have steady paying jobs!

Edited by: FutureMrsM2009 on Dec 3, 2008 5:20 PM

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karebeartg Posts : 831 Registered: 6/25/08
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 5:57 PM Go to message in response to: MrsM2009

I think I agree with FutureMrsM2009 -- if it's the government (really, any government), the interview process can be really really annoying. Do you have to let your parents know now? Could FH try calling back a few days before you'd have to leave to see if they have any updates?

In this economy, I'd probably prioritize the job...or maybe you could go out for the full time and FH could join you out there for a weekend or something?

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nanette927 Posts : 1,748 Registered: 1/28/08
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 6:14 PM Go to message in response to: karebeartg


In this economy, I'd probably prioritize the job...or maybe you could go out for the full time and FH could join you out there for a weekend or something?


I have to agree, with this. Being government and all...it's hard enough to get a "regular" job right now. I'd say yes to the vaction (for now) and see if they call him back. I'd give them my cell number as a primary number this way he WONT miss their call. If that's not possible then deffinatly not go on vacation.


 

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carebearny1999 Posts : 1,253 Registered: 9/21/07
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 6:26 PM Go to message in response to: m2810

Well I see your confusion! I'd say the gov't job hands-down however I re-read your post. You say both grandparents are very ill. Very ill as in may pass away ill??? If that's the case, I see why you're so torn. I'd say go visit them. Is there any way to give the gov't people a number to call (cell/house phone where you're visiting?) if they want him before you're back? Or call and check your answering machine every day remotely? That way if they do want him while you're gone you make arrangements to get back... Just an idea!

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MrsGrimm Posts : 39 Registered: 3/30/08
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 10:33 PM Go to message in response to: m2810

I was in that position once. It wasn't that my grandparents were sick but it was that my parents took my grandparents on vacation. They are getting older and we don't know how much longer they will be around, but I had a good paying job. I didn't go and 2 weeks after they got back I got laid off and I've regreted not going ever since.

If you ever do anything for money, you won't be happy. I say go see your family. You're grandparents aren't always going to be there forever but he'll always be able to find a better job. You might regret not going later.

Thats my advice

  • Jessi

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kennysoldwife Posts : 3,859 Registered: 4/28/07
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 4, 2008 8:11 AM Go to message in response to: m2810

I would say go along with your vacation plans. If your husband gets called between now and then you can alter your plans accordingly. Having a government job I can say he probably won't be starting any job before the first of the year. I was offered my current job the first week of Dec. I didn't start until after Jan. 15. I wouldn't stress about it. If he hasn't gotten the call by the time you are ready to leave just use call fowarding, that way you at least still get the call.

Kenny and Me Perfect Together, 10 years and counting.

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Lilmisssouthern... Posts : 658 Registered: 8/12/08
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 4, 2008 9:12 AM Go to message in response to: m2810

I wouldn't want to work for a company like that either... They have no idea about anything... no dates no info?? I mean seriously he could be waiting for something that might not happen... then what are you left with?? Hubby having no job and not being able to see your grandparents....


Can't wait to be  a Mrs.

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m2810 Posts : 45 Registered: 11/17/07
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 4, 2008 12:20 PM Go to message in response to: Lilmisssouthern...

Thanks ladies. Hearing from you ladies really put things into perspective. I realized that I would be more regretful if I didn't go because I already lost my grandfather and DH grandparents and my grandma are very ill and in there mid 80's. We could later make up for the job if we missed out and family does come first. The other thing is that we have never met eachothers granparents and if we go our 1 year anniversary would be spent over there and it would be very meaningful to have the chance to meet them. I'm very greatful for all the responses. It's great to know that I oculd come on the boards and get opinion. I guess I will just go along with my plans unless we here something else in the mean time! Thanks!! Again!! Maria

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seadreamer Posts : 522 Registered: 6/8/07
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 5, 2008 2:07 PM Go to message in response to: m2810

Why don't you have your home phone calls fowarded to your cell phone?

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JackieB0129 Posts : 497 Registered: 4/24/07
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Dec 9, 2008 7:47 PM Go to message in response to: seadreamer

I'll be honest. I've never had a job that told me exactly when I would be able to start. The job i'm at now took over a month between the interview and a phone call to tell me that I got it.

I agree with some of the pps. Forward everything to your cell phone and go from there.

Jackie B!

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jackson132 Posts : 1,623 Registered: 9/13/12
Re: So Confused!! Should Me and DH take the risk?????
Posted: Sep 16, 2012 3:18 AM Go to message in response to: m2810

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