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I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!

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Online Users: 0 guest(s), 0 user(s). Replies: 46
Guest
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Jan 4, 2008 3:28 PM Go to message in response to: midget

Ladies, It may seem that I lucked out on this one!  The ring was a size 6 and my ring finger is a 4. And due to the fact that the ring had a special design all the way around it cannot be sized down.  We picked out another ring together at Tiffany's and it's a pink sapphire and SQUARE!!!!  I LOVE IT!!!!  Thanks for all your coments and SUPPORT!!



November22Bride Posts : 397 Registered: 1/8/08
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Jan 9, 2008 2:16 PM Go to message in response to: midget

I know how you are feeling, when my fh showed me the ring that I was going to wear for the rest of my life I started to cry the ring was not me at all, it was big and boxie and I was having issues with the white gold changing colors and I had only been wearing it for about a week. I had a pit in my stomach for weeks over a ring. I finally got up the nerve to tell him that I didn’t like the quality of the ring. So he let me pick out a new one that we ended up getting a really good deal on and it’s much better quality diamond. He even likes this ring much better.


Angele Posts : 76 Registered: 8/15/07
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Jan 11, 2008 12:38 AM Go to message in response to: midget

Seriously, if you hate it, tell him. I see a lot of people on this site and other forums who post about how their guy is sweet, wonderful, etc. but that he got the girl a ring she hated. And yes, many people will say the ring is a symbol of your love, however, that symbol should not be something that you absolutely detest wearing on your finger--everyday--for the rest of your life. If your guy really loves you, he'll at least listen to you and your arguments about a ring that you do not like.

 



JAllen Posts : 793 Registered: 9/1/06
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Jan 19, 2008 10:34 AM Go to message in response to: Angele

I'd love to see a pic of it!!  I tried to find it on the Tiffany site but I couldn't!

 

I agree with Angele on this one.  Rings are a very personal choice.  I don't wear a lot of jewlery but what I do wear has to have a certain "look".  Simple, basic, but pretty.  I don't like anything elaborate, ornate, busy, colorful.  I like silver, white gold, and platinum.  I don't like alot going on.  So if my fh gave me a ring that had a lot of pattern to it, or jading or anything antique-y, I would hate it.  And I would know that he loves me and it came from his heart, but that wouldn't change my feelings.  Now I'm not the type of girl to be like, ew gross, try again.  I would wear it, love what it stood for, but pray that I get mugged! lol  No, I'm kidding.  After we got engaged we went to pick out a ring.  He was showing me these big 3 stone rings, lots of diamonds on the sides, stuff like that.  I had it in my head I just wanted a solitaire.  So we ended up with a 5/8 colorless set in platinum.  I loved it.  A year and half later, I still loved it, but wished I had let him talk me into something a little bigger or whatever.  But I still thought it was so pretty.  Well, we went to look at wedding bands one day, and we started looking at sets and stuff and we ended up exchanging mine for one that is so awsome!  And so different.  It's very simple, wide white gold band, with a .75ct in the center and two 1/4 ct diamonds on either side.  But the diamonds are sidways, going across the band, not down it.  And a beautiful simple band with diamonds across it to match.  I'm thrilled with it and so is he.  He loves beautiful jewlery, and he told me that he had picked out a bridal set secretly that he was going to surprise me with either before the wedding or on the wedding day.  He wanted something flashier and stuff.  So we both got what we wanted.  The set he had picked out was amazing, but it was WAAAAAY too much for me!  All these huge diamonds across both bands.  No way, I would have been so unhappy had he surprised me at the alter with that! lol  I mean its absolutely gorgous, just not my style at all.  So it totally worked out!  I'm glad it worked out for you too!!  Now lets see that beautiful pink sapphire!!!!


 

http://www.mywedding.com/vanceandjammie/

Guest
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Jan 23, 2008 4:03 PM Go to message in response to: midget

The same thing happened to my mom and my parents have been married 27 years, and very happy still. On their 25th anniversary, my Dad got my mom another one, which she picked out and absolutely loves. She put it to me this way, yes it's true I don't love it, but I absolutely loved your dad, and when I look at it, I smile because when he bought it for me, all he was thinking of was how excited he was for me to be his wife.

 


Past heartache erased from memory
replaced with thoughts of you
Even in all the uncertainty
of tomorrow, I feel at peace
a calm resonates inside my heart
For you have given back to me
the joy I
had once found in today
In the wake of your smile
time stands still, I get lost in the moment
your eyes meet mine
light shades of blue
Radiate a warmth
reflected from your soul
dissolving my fears
So easily could I stay here
content to be
peacefully wrapped up
in solitude with you


 



2009ToBeMrsV Posts : 256 Registered: 12/30/07
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Jan 23, 2008 4:41 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I personally agree with Cantwait2wed.

I was fortunate in that my fiance wanted to share the ring shopping experience with me, I picked out 2 rings that I liked and he made the end decision.  However, regardless of what he had given me I would have found the beauty within it, even if it wasn't exactly what I was looking for.  Fact is if your man decided to take matters into his own hands and go for something bigger and more expensive, then he did it out of love and the fact that he thought maybe something bigger and more expensive would make you happier. 

All the girls who say they hate their ring and would tell him they don't like it so they could get one they want to me are people who are stuck in our materliastic side of society.  Yes, you have to wear the ring for the rest of your life... but in actuality I see a lot of older women who only wear their wedding band and only wear the engagement ring on special occasions.  Why not pick out a nice wedding band to either compliment your ring, or that you will love enough to wear alone and only wear your engagement ring on special occasions. 

I think we should all learn the beauty behind what our future husbands have done for us, and what it truly means and look beyond the exterior of "it's not what I wanted".  Well you know what, you don't always get what you want, and I will go as far to say you are lucky to have a man who loves you enough to want to marry you and spend the rest of his life with you.  Accept it and be greatful for what you've been given, because it is probably a lot more then many other people could ever dream of having.


___________________________________ 

Engaged: January 1, 2008
Getting Married: September 19, 2009


chicago2008bride Posts : 3 Registered: 11/19/07
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Dec 2, 2008 9:07 AM Go to message in response to: midget

midget wrote:My man is a wonderful guy but I hate my engagement ring! It is horrible!!! Everything I said I didn't want he did! I wanted square, he bought round. I wanted antique he bought me modern! I begged for cheap he went to Tiffany's! I HATE TIFFANY'S! They are too plain! No style! What do I do?????????? How do I tell him??? HELP ME@!!!!!!

I feel bad that you are in this situation, but at least you still have a chance to get a ring you want by talking with him. Tell him now, don't wait. I decided to not say anything and I hate my engagement ring. I picked it out because I knew it was the only one he could afford. I don't wear my enagement ring now that we're married because it makes me sad everytime I wear it since its now a constant reminder of something I settled for.


SantsBabe Posts : 1 Registered: 10/1/08
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 1:21 PM Go to message in response to: midget

midget wrote:My man is a wonderful guy but I hate my engagement ring! It is horrible!!! Everything I said I didn't want he did! I wanted square, he bought round. I wanted antique he bought me modern! I begged for cheap he went to Tiffany's! I HATE TIFFANY'S! They are too plain! No style! What do I do?????????? How do I tell him??? HELP ME@!!!!!!
What an ingrate!! You don't ask for the ring- the symbol of his love for you is what he gave you, his heart, his soul. I asked my man to be thrifty and not spend a lot and he didn't but he bought me the most beautiful ring and even if he didn't, I would wear it proudly.



KateKamke Posts : 2 Registered: 7/6/08
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 1:56 PM Go to message in response to: midget

I hate to say it, but you can't really reject the ring that he picked out for you without really hurting his feelings.

I have a suggestion, though, my mom had a very standard, plain engagement ring (a diamond solitare on a white gold band), but my dad gave her an additional diamond when each of her children were born (3 total) and she took her ring into a jeweler and had them build onto her ring to add the additional diamonds. Her ring is now very unique and even more meaningful to her. You could do a similar thing either for the births of children or for anniversaries and gradually change your ring to a design that appeals to you more without hurting your fiance's feelings.



SanaChan Posts : 47 Registered: 1/2/08
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 1:58 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

Wow! You really did luck out! I'm glad that that worked out for you in the end! And then no ones feelings get hurt in the process either!

For any women out there reading this thread, and feeling like they hate their e-ring, I would suggest picking out a really nice wedding ring you absolutly love! You could put the e-ring away after you're married, and just wear the wedding ring.
"Those who want to relive their youth, are probably too old to remember it."



WinterWonderlan... Posts : 658 Registered: 8/23/08
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 2:01 PM Go to message in response to: midget

If someone, say your FH, bought you a Christmas present and you secretly hated it, but he had spent a long time picking it out for you and was so excited to give it to you, would tell him to exchange it? I'm hoping the answer to that is no...

Not to sound rude, but I think you are being a little selfish. This ring is not just about you. I don't think it is any big "symbol" or anything, but you are only thinking about yourself. Yes YOU are the one who is going to be wearing it, but your FH is the one who is going to be looking at it everyday and feeling so proud of himself about it. I am sure that he as most guys do put a lot of effort and money into picking that ring. Whether it was what you told him or not, he was envisioning YOU during the search, and this must have been what he envisioned making YOU happy. It is a huge moment for us to be proposed to and get the ring, but it is also a huge deal to HIM to put that ring that he worked so hard to find on your finger and feel accomplished and proud of himself, don't take that away from him.


I know if I was to tell my FH that I didn't like my ring after he went to zillions of jewelry stores and paid thousands for it and that it should be exchanged, he'd probably be doing some exchanging himself, and I'd no longer have a FH.


wedding widget


jeepgirl179 Posts : 3 Registered: 10/25/08
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 5:44 PM Go to message in response to: midget

I wanted a different ring than the one my fiance and I bought, I think I was in a hurry to agree to anything just to get that proposal! If it hasn't been very long, I would think Tiffany's would not want you to keep a ring you're not happy with, I'll bet they have a good return policy and then you can get the type of ring you really want. I don't think your fiance would want you to keep that from him. The proposal itself still has meaning, and I'll bet he'd be happy to spend less than he would at Tiffany's. Good luck!


midget wrote:
My man is a wonderful guy but I hate my engagement ring!  It is horrible!!!  Everything I said I didn't want he did! I wanted square, he bought round.  I wanted antique he bought me modern! I begged for cheap he went to Tiffany's!  I HATE TIFFANY'S!  They are too plain!  No style!  What do I do??????????  How do I tell him??? HELP ME@!!!!!!

"It is never too late to be what you might have been. " -- George Eliot

 


aliemarch Posts : 1 Registered: 11/26/08
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 6:39 PM Go to message in response to: Angele

you are right! You must say somthing if you hate your ring otherwise you will start to despise your fiancee! You MUST tell him.. you will be discussing far more imporrtant issue during your marriage.. this is an easy discussion!!


indeclouds Posts : 1 Registered: 10/29/08
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 6:42 PM Go to message in response to: Jerseygal8785

Although I can understand being a little disappointed about not getting exactly what you want I am saddened for your relationship if your ring is more important than the meaning behind the commitment that this man has made for you.

Hate is such a strong word, and saying you HATE your ring is like telling the world that the commitment and thought that was taken into picking out that special surprise was totally insignificant to you.

I am sure that you didn't mean for your posting to come across so callous, but I do hope that you reconsider and love the ring for what it really represents.




Danielle

"Life is too short for Drama, so Kiss slowly, Laugh insanely, Love truly, and Forgive quickly"


pleasesayido Posts : 1 Registered: 12/4/08
Re: I HATE MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!!!!!
Posted: Dec 4, 2008 12:33 AM Go to message in response to: midget

Hi! I was just in your shoes! My man of my dreams gave me an engagement ring that was nothing what I had wanted, he even took me to see rings and show him what I liked, and I still got a ring that was nothing like what I showed him! It was a beautiful ring, and I had dropped a couple of small hints that it wasn't exactly what I wanted and he never offered to have a conversation about it, and acted a bit offended. I decided to suck it up and not say anything. 6 months went by, and then when we were working with a jeweler to design the wedding band for my ring, I just wasn't happy with it, so I finally talked to him about it. It was a HARD topic to bring up, and even though the conversation was uncomfortable in the beginning, we turned it around, after sharing a couple of ideas with him of how we could modify the ring to make it more like what I visioned - he got really into it! We met with our jeweler and together designed a whole new engagement ring for me - using the diamond from the one he bought me. I LOVE the design of the new ring, and he loves that we designed it together! Be brave! Be kind when you talk about it! And it should work out, and maybe even become an incredibly meaningful event for you! Good luck!

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