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I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it

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TheNewMrsJ Posts : 754 Registered: 1/6/08
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 22, 2008 2:51 PM Go to message in response to: auntofthebride

dear Nanette,"...i have a 16 yr old that hates wearing anything too "girlie".  She wears nothing but jeans printed t-shirts"
LOL! That would have been me, circa 1969.

My very nicely dressed mother lived in despair.

LOL AotB, that was me like 9-10 years ago! I wore the baggy skater pants, the printed tshirts, and i loved my duct tape wallet with the chain clipped onto my pants! my parents hated it, lol...

ah, those were fun memories!


 

 

countdown to your wedding

*September 13, 2008 *

 

 

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XYZ1 Posts : 367 Registered: 1/7/08
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 22, 2008 3:49 PM Go to message in response to: TheNewMrsJ

i have a 16 yr old that hates wearing anything too "girlie".  She wears nothing but jeans printed t-shirts"
LOL! That would have been me, circa 1969.

My very nicely dressed mother lived in despair.

This was me, circa 1996-2004 (aka "high school and college").  XL sweaters on my S frame, baggy khakis, beat-up shoes ... I was a mess.  And not even a rebellious mess, more of a too-lazy-to-buy-clothes-that-fit mess.  My also very nicely dressed mother also lived in despair, and would on occasion sneak into my closet and throw the rattiest items out. 

I've gotten better, happily.

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auntofthebride Posts : 9,357 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 22, 2008 6:43 PM Go to message in response to: CyclistLover

Dear CL,

"AND maybe just maybe grandma is a nasty grandma to the girl who dressed inappropriately in the poster's opinion.  Not all grandma's are sweet and nice to all of their grandchildren!  "

I don't know if the grandmother was horrid or ultra-nice. I don't know if the cousin dresses appropriately or not.

All I know is that the OP, the bride in question, is not happy with her cousin for two reasons: her style of dress and interactions with Grandma.

The bride in question has the total right, for whatever reason, to not want the cousin as a bridesmaid. She can decide who is a bridesmaid based on any criteria she wants.

My only suggestion was to consider the situation of the other sister/cousin, who apparently does not dress inappropriately in the OP's opinion and is not rude to Grandma in the OP's opinion.

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auntofthebride Posts : 9,357 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 22, 2008 6:45 PM Go to message in response to: TheNewMrsJ

Dear Mrs J,

"I wore the baggy skater pants"

Oh, I think those look so cool on the kids these days!!! I sure with we would have had them back when I was that age.

I am also jealous of all the great sneakers that have come on the market since then. The only variety of sneakers I had as a child were Keds.

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auntofthebride Posts : 9,357 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 22, 2008 6:49 PM Go to message in response to: XYZ1

Dear Claire,

"My also very nicely dressed mother also lived in despair, and would on occasion sneak into my closet and throw the rattiest items out.  "

It's all part of the Mother's Handbook. My mother did that, and I had to do that with my sons. It's in the same chapter as telling them to wear nice underwear, so in case you are hit by a car and have to go the hospital, you won't be embarrassed if the doctors and nurses see your ratty underwear.

My boys cared nothing about clothes. I used to say I could put them in plastic garbage bags and send them out. They wouldn't have noticed.

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CyclistLover Posts : 1,184 Registered: 7/9/07
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 22, 2008 11:13 PM Go to message in response to: auntofthebride

Actually AOTB -

Why do you think they call it the "world's oldest profession"? Women of low self-esteem have been dressing tarty for generations.

Above AOTB you pretty call the cousin a hooker.  So I think you had more to say than to consider the "nice" cousin.

Per usual you bring out the high horse that you have to climb a ladder to reach and give your "wisdom".  DEAR SO & SO.

NEWS FLASH - I hate to break it to you but Dear Abby's job has been filled for years I know it's heart breaking but I have a bit of shocking news for you - posting on this website isn't Dear Abby or Ann Landers so climb the 20 stories down from the high horse, put the ladder away and put the Dear Abby job application in the garbage.

peace.


Happiness is a puppy greeting you at the door!

I hope you don't get hit by a city bus Cool

 

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auntofthebride Posts : 9,357 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 22, 2008 11:46 PM Go to message in response to: CyclistLover

Dear CL,

"Above AOTB you pretty call the cousin a hooker.  So I think you had more to say than to consider the "nice" cousin."

That was in response to a comment that revealing clothes are in fashion now.

They have always been in fashion with hookers. That does not mean a person wearing a revealing fashion is a hooker. It just means that she might be considered as looking like one.

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MrsM2009 Posts : 422 Registered: 3/16/08
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 22, 2008 11:52 PM Go to message in response to: CyclistLover

CyclistLover - I find your comment to be totally rude and inappropriate.  This is a public message board and anyone is free to post whatever they please.  If you see something you disagree with and you don't have any constructive response to it, just ignore it.  Berating others and name calling is pointless and makes the boards a negative place.

AOTB's comment about the "world's oldest profession" seems like it was just a joke, so to imply that she is hypocritical because it doesn't jive with the rest of her comments is unfair.  I personally have never believed her to be someone on a high horse.  She has a style of speaking/typing, as do we all, but it is neither condescending nor rude.  She is clearly a very well informed and intelligent woman who knows a lot about weddings, not to mention many other helpful things, and who chooses to spend time on these boards sharing her advice with others.  So many of the posters on these boards are in similar situations - young, planning a first wedding, not much experience attending or being involved in weddings - and I think the fact that someone with a totally different perspective than that is willing to come here and share their opinions is fantastic and helpful to everyone.  If you don't like it, ignore it.

Regardless of whether I disagree with what she's saying, I've never found ANYTHING AOTB says to be poorly reasoned, nonsensical, or preachy.  That's more than I can say for a lot of people who post on the internet.  I'm not sure what your issue is here, but I see no reason to respond to a few opinions as rudely as you did.

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kennysoldwife Posts : 3,862 Registered: 4/28/07
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 23, 2008 7:45 AM Go to message in response to: MrsM2009

You must not have been around very long.  Her replies can be very preachy and condesending.  You have not been on the receiving end of her high horse opinions otherwise you might have a different take on things. 

Anyway as you said this is a public message board and people have the right to voice their opinion in the manner they chose without having someone come in and tell them how they should feel.  If you are having a lovefest with AOTB good for you others are not.


Kenny and Me Perfect Together,  10 years and counting.



 

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CyclistLover Posts : 1,184 Registered: 7/9/07
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 23, 2008 8:58 AM Go to message in response to: MrsM2009

FutureMrsM - guess what - AOTB has been beyond rude to more than one person on MANY occassions. And frankly I'm tired of not saying anything when I disagree with what she has to say and/or find her comments to be rather rude or annoying. 

Good for you that you like AOTB's posts - give it time, if your on here long enough she'll give her high horse attitude to you, and I'm sure it will piss you off. 

Until then, enjoy the Dear Abby posts of hers.

Peace.


Happiness is a puppy greeting you at the door!

I hope you don't get hit by a city bus Cool

 

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CyclistLover Posts : 1,184 Registered: 7/9/07
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 23, 2008 9:51 AM Go to message in response to: MrsM2009

 

Hey FutureMrsM,

It's really funny that you point out that I'm rude and inconsiderate and then proceed to say how berating others is pointless.  Pretty entertaining actually. 

Peace

 

CyclistLover - I find your comment to be totally rude and inappropriate.  This is a public message board and anyone is free to post whatever they please.  If you see something you disagree with and you don't have any constructive response to it, just ignore it.  Berating others and name calling is pointless and makes the boards a negative place.


Happiness is a puppy greeting you at the door!

I hope you don't get hit by a city bus Cool

 

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RanAway2Maine Posts : 2,359 Registered: 1/27/08
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 23, 2008 9:58 AM Go to message in response to: CyclistLover

Cyclist-

Is that a train I hear in the distance? Uh Oh! There's two of them! Watch out! Surprised

Linda Jo and Dean-July 19, 2008

http://s343.photobucket.com/albums/o465/RanAway2Maine/?action=view&current=Picture286.ojpg

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CyclistLover Posts : 1,184 Registered: 7/9/07
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 23, 2008 10:02 AM Go to message in response to: RanAway2Maine

It's Thomas, it's Thomas - LOL

(Thomas the train)


Happiness is a puppy greeting you at the door!

I hope you don't get hit by a city bus Cool

 

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Beachwed Posts : 782 Registered: 9/19/06
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 23, 2008 10:10 AM Go to message in response to: CyclistLover

Again?  Really? 

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allbusiness Posts : 106 Registered: 7/17/07
Re: I was a Bridezilla - very ashamed of it
Posted: Oct 23, 2008 10:17 AM Go to message in response to: TheNewMrsJ

i'm assuming that comparing me to a snotty 17 year old was your attempt at a thinly veiled insult.  so here's mine: i shop primarily at brooks brothers (not that i expect you to know what that is), saks fifth avenue, and occasionally jcrew.  i certainly don't go around "showing off" my body, but i'm not going to hide it either.  i wear short skirts and tank tops in the summer, and sport bikinis at the beach.  some of my clothes are form fitting, yet manage not to show any cleavage or skin above my knees.  like i said, one can dress sexily without being trampy. 

the poster said nothing about the cousin wearing "tarty" clothes to church.  i would agree that people should dress in conservative fashion when attending church.  otherwise, people are free to dress as they please.  to say that wearing a short skirt invites unwanted attention from men is bordering on dangerous territory.  that's the same sort of logic that people often use to blame rape victims stating that the way they were dressed was "asking for it." 

the cousin probably could have found a better way to convey to her grandma that she would continue to dress as she pleased.  but, she could have also been tired of her grandma and the rest of her family calling her a "tart" and whatever else b/c she doesn't want to wear garbage bags to cover up the shape of her body. 

i speak from experience when i say that not all grandmas are loving and nice.  mine is, quite frankly, a heinous bitch.  i've always been respectful to her, but i finally had to cut off all contact with the old witch to restrain myself from saying all the things i've been wanting to say for years.  what i'm saying is, there are two sides to every story.  and what i meant when i said that people have different ideas of what is appropriate was that maybe the cousin really isn't dressing all that "tartly," but her family thinks that women should wear knee-length skirts and blouses buttoned up to the neck. 

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