MisterKelleys No B.S. Advice Column - NEW- MY Question of the Week #2

Online Users: 1,235 guest(s), 0 user(s). Replies: 297


MsDenuninani Posts : 3,962 Registered: 3/16/07
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 9:30 AM Go to message in response to: MisterKelley

Thank you for your advice MisterKelley!  If you can help me out a little bit more, I would appreciate it.  Because although I can tell my husband that I admire MisterKelley, some details would be helpful.  Perhaps if you could fill me in some more about yourself, such as how often you give your wife flowers, how often you replace the ice cubes in the icetray, how often you fold your own laundry and do the dishes without being asked, and the many, many times you forgo video games in order to watch So You Think You Can Dance (and while watching SYTYCD, you helpfully put your hands over your wife's ears whenever Mary is talking). . .if you can provide these details, I think it will really help me fill out your profile and paint the proper picture to my hubby. 

Thanks again!  You're the best!

Signed,

Thinks Neve Campbell Has A Pointy Face

 


__________________________________________
"I'm asking you to believe.  Not just in my ability to bring about real change in Washington. . .I'm asking you to believe in yours." - Barack Obama

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kelleyiskelley Posts : 11,590 Registered: 7/2/06
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 9:38 AM Go to message in response to: MsDenuninani

LOL at MrsD's entire post HehHeh ....:)

Check out the Wedding Buzz and My Blog @ www.myaislerunner.com

Time for Biggest Loser 7 where TEAM KEL -LIZZA will remain Champions of Weightloss!

"When you're born, you get a free ticket to the Freak Show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat." - R.I.P. George Carlin

 

 

 

 

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BoysMissLady Posts : 932 Registered: 1/18/07
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 9:45 AM Go to message in response to: MisterKelley

Mr Kelley,

My FH is what one would call a manly man, and I am the girliest chick I know...so basically we are polar opposites.  So why is it that my FH wants me to go see all of the violent, scary movies with him, but he never wants to see girly stuff?  That's just not fair!

Signed,
WhineyGirlieMovieGirl


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Pamlin Posts : 958 Registered: 10/26/06
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 10:13 AM Go to message in response to: MisterKelley

Hi Mr. Kelley!

First time poster, long time reader.

What is with vegans?  Why do they think that the world will suddenly stop and change around a function menu just for them?  Isn't it enough that we didn't kill and eat them like the prey animals they are?

Signed

100% Carnivore


Pamlin

The wedding will be lovely, but it's the next day and every day after that makes me truly excited.

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kennysoldwife Posts : 3,859 Registered: 4/28/07
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 10:44 AM Go to message in response to: Pamlin

Love the last few questions can't wait to read the answers. 

MrsD. your post was truly priceless. 


Kenny and Me Perfect Together,  10 years and counting.

 

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MisterKelley Posts : 258 Registered: 7/11/08
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 1:12 PM Go to message in response to: CyclistLover

Cyclistlover writes:

Dear Mr. Kelley,

Do men notice if women have on cute shoes? 

No!


EMT - I'm not here to save your life, just prolong your miserable existence

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MisterKelley Posts : 258 Registered: 7/11/08
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 1:31 PM Go to message in response to: MsDenuninani

Mrs.Denunininanonunenanninanni - awe screw it!!!   Mrs D writes:

Thank you for your advice MisterKelley!  If you can help me out a little bit more, I would appreciate it.  Because although I can tell my husband that I admire MisterKelley, some details would be helpful.  Perhaps if you could fill me in some more about yourself, such as how often you give your wife flowers, how often you replace the ice cubes in the icetray, how often you fold your own laundry and do the dishes without being asked, and the many, many times you forgo video games in order to watch So You Think You Can Dance (and while watching SYTYCD, you helpfully put your hands over your wife's ears whenever Mary is talking). . .if you can provide these details, I think it will really help me fill out your profile and paint the proper picture to my hubby. 

Thanks again!  You're the best!

 Well flowers is an area that I need to improve upon - see how I admit this? :)  You should also know that I'm right on top of refilling all 3 3 ice cube trays in my refrigerator when they need it. Fold the laundry? Ha Ha Honey I do the entire laundry every week, that includes folding. I also do the dishes quite frequently without being asked. As for forgoing Video ganes to watch dance programs, well I rarely if ever play video ganes at night. WHile I don't take an active interest in SYTYCD, I make sure that I'm in the same room with Mrs. Kelley when she watches it. This tells you that I'm willing to suffer right along with her. I can't cover her ears when Mary talks because I'm too damn busy covering my own ears, I swear when woman laughs I have to replace 4 lightbulbs and the TV speaker. But I am pretty quick on the mute button. As an added bonus, Misterkelley is the one who vacuums, mops the floors, takes the trash out, puts gas in the car for my wife, and loves animals. Your husband can't compete.

P.S. I'm not answering any more of your questions until you take back what you said about Neve Campbell.


EMT - I'm not here to save your life, just prolong your miserable existence


Message was edited by: MisterKelley

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MisterKelley Posts : 258 Registered: 7/11/08
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 1:57 PM Go to message in response to: BoysMissLady

Boysmisslady - really!! where do you people get thses names???  Has a FH that hates going to see girlie movies. Well Miss, that's probabily because girlie movies usually revolve around things like relationships, commitments, love and romance. Answer me this: at what point in When Harry met Sally or Sleepless in Seattle does s**t blow up? when, during You've Got Mail does an alien throw a city bus through the Crysler building?  It doesn't happen does it? But you know what does happen? a 10 minute scene focused on a guy and his girlfriend bickering over a stupid Roy Rogers garage sale wagonwheel coffee table. Or when Harry and Sally are in the Sharper Image store and Harry says 6 years later, you're singing Surry with a fringe on top IN FRONT OF IRA !!!!!  And what about the scene in Sleepless when Meg Ryan finds the little kid's teddy bear at the top of the Empire State Building on Valentines Day, and Tom Hanks convinces the guard to let him go up one last time and that's when they finally meet for the first time.  You see, Boysmisslady, there's no intrinsic value for a guy in those movies and therefore no reason to see them. Which, of course, I have not  
EMT - I'm not here to save your life, just prolong your miserable existence

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MisterKelley Posts : 258 Registered: 7/11/08
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 2:13 PM Go to message in response to: Pamlin

Pamlin has a problen with people who don't eat meat:

First time poster, long time reader.

What is with vegans?  Why do they think that the world will suddenly stop and change around a function menu just for them?  Isn't it enough that we didn't kill and eat them like the prey animals they are?

Signed

100% Carnivore

The reason why Vegans think we should adjust every menu to satisfy their personal desires is because we carnavors, being the nice, caring people we are, attempt to make them feel like they aren't a bunch of bead making, VW microbus driving,Grateful Dead following, can't accept life outside of 1968, draft dodging. hippies. You try to make them feel comfortable and accepted and what kind of gratitude do you get? None!! that's what, they are total ingrates. Like it's their right to tell you what the f you want to serve. So the next time fate spits into your face and your forced to deal with one or more of these people, go ahead and make something out of bean curd or tofu or whatever the hell it is that they agree with. Then you inform them that since you really want them to feel comfortable, Diner music will consist of Jefferson Starship's Greatest Hits - Hey they used to be Jefferson Airplane right? What's the damn difference. Mention during dinner about how you think Bob Dylan is so much better after he began playing Electric Guitar. By doing this, it should relieve you of ever having to deal with these types of people ever again.


EMT - I'm not here to save your life, just prolong your miserable existence

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CyclistLover Posts : 1,183 Registered: 7/9/07
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 2:42 PM Go to message in response to: MisterKelley

Misterkelley - if you don't watch click movies - THEN how do you know about singing "Surry with a fringe on top IN FRONT OF IRA???"  Hmmmm - does this line mean anything to you - "Horses, horses, horses"????

Mr. Kelley - what if my cute shoes are red with 4 inch heels?


Happiness is a puppy greeting you at the door!

I hope you don't get hit by a city bus Cool

 

 

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BoysMissLady Posts : 932 Registered: 1/18/07
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 3:24 PM Go to message in response to: CyclistLover

Cyclist, Isn't that something?  He knows all about the movie!  I would not pick you to be a girlie man, Mr Kelley.  And my FH is very interested in my shoes, especially the red ones with the 4 inch heels.


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kroberts Posts : 443 Registered: 7/30/07
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 6:30 PM Go to message in response to: BoysMissLady

Is there a time frame that we have to reach 500 posts in? Last I checked you were only at 100 something...we love your smartass remarks to our mundane questions, but 500 posts is asking a lot.

April 4, 2009 is the BIG day!

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Ashleyanne2010 Posts : 447 Registered: 5/3/08
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 7:40 PM Go to message in response to: MisterKelley

Dear MisterKelley,

How should I go about getting FutureMr.Ashleyanne away from WoW (World of Warcraft) and off the couch???  And how do I get him to eat something other than Round Table or Jack in the Box when I'm not there to make dinner for us???

WoW+fast food= not good.

Sincerely,

WoW hating gym rat


 

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MisterKelley Posts : 258 Registered: 7/11/08
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 7:45 PM Go to message in response to: CyclistLover

Cyclist lover just can't get shoes out of her mind apparently. She Scribbles:

Misterkelley - if you don't watch click movies - THEN how do you know about singing "Surry with a fringe on top IN FRONT OF IRA???"  Hmmmm - does this line mean anything to you - "Horses, horses, horses"????

Mr. Kelley - what if my cute shoes are red with 4 inch heels?

I told you, I don't watch Chick Flix, I wouldn't know anything about Meg Ryan in her car listening to the radio. I also would not know that the name of Meg Ryan's character in You've got Mail is Katherine Kelly and the name of her Bookstore is "The Shop Around the Corner" or that the name of Joe Fox's dog is Brinkley. So please!! Stop with the Preconcieved notions that I have ever viewed any of these movies.

As for the shoes, yes I would notice Red 4" heeled shoes, especially if they're hooked behind your ears.

 


EMT - I'm not here to save your life, just prolong your miserable existence

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MisterKelley Posts : 258 Registered: 7/11/08
Re: MisterKelleys no BS advice column
Posted: Jul 23, 2008 8:16 PM Go to message in response to: Ashleyanne2010

Ashleyanne2010 Writes:

Dear MisterKelley,

How should I go about getting FutureMr.Ashleyanne away from WoW (World of Warcraft) and off the couch???  And how do I get him to eat something other than Round Table or Jack in the Box when I'm not there to make dinner for us???

WoW+fast food= not good.

Sincerely,

WoW hating gym rat 

Ashley, I haven't had Jack in the Box since I moved away from L.A. in the mid 80's. That place ruled. They had these commercials where they would blow up the Jack in the box Mascot. I got a Hot Wheels car from JITB when I was 6 and it's worth close to $200 dollars now. Makes me kinda wish that I hadn't of thrown it at my best friend and it broke when it hit the street. Bobby was such an A**hole. Anyway, in Misterkelley's world, JITB kicks about 12 kinds of ass. You know what else I miss?  In 'N Out Burger and Carl's Jr. and Shakey's Pizza and...............  Oh sorry, kinda got lost in Nostalgia there for a sec. Anyway just uh, tell him that umm that stuff is bad for you and I'm sure he'll come around. 

As for your World of Warcraft problem, I'm afraid that this is something that is going to require quite a bit of planning and Strategery on your part. You see, Once WoW gets ahold of you, it's extremely difficult to revert back to a normal human being. What you're gonna have to do is find the troll that lives in the tree near the forest of Enduran, He's a powerful Wizard, he'll give you a special spell that can help you but he's going to want something from you first. He wants you to rescue his Daughter who was Kidnapped by Bork the Ogre and is being held prisoner inside his castle by the river. But first, in order to cross the river, you'll need a boat. It just so happens that Gelda the Fortune Teller has just such a vessel, and she might be willing to let you have it if you can return her Golden Harp to her that was stolen by a thief named Billy, once you swap the harp for the boat, you'll need to find a pair of oars to get you across the moat. Check inside the cave next to the Warrior's Log Cabin.

if that doesn't work, You might want to try putting on a pair of Red 4" heeled shoes.  

 


EMT - I'm not here to save your life, just prolong your miserable existence

Message was edited by: MisterKelley

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