Was it really "worth it"? be honest

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riderzblock Posts : 65 Registered: 10/30/07
Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jun 25, 2008 2:16 PM

I have been watching Rich Bride, Poor Bride and every couple that goes over their budget (which is most) always say, "Yeah, but it was worth it!" I wanna know, was it all really worth it? Can anyone say, "don't spend the money on the cake no one eats, or the shoes no one sees or the flowers that die or the invitations or the wedding planner..." If you are married, tell me if there was anything that wasn't really worth it. 


ArtBride Posts : 4,838 Registered: 5/9/07
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jun 25, 2008 3:09 PM Go to message in response to: riderzblock

We didn't go over budget, but every penny we spent was worth it, I think. There were a lot of things that I didn't notice on our wedding day (such as music during the ceremony), but I'm sure other people noticed.

As for the specific things you mentioned, I think our cake was totally worth it - but we made sure that we got really GOOD cake. If you're getting crappy cake, it's not worth the money, IMO. As for flowers, my bouquet was TOTALLY WORTH IT. I sent it home to my grandmother who has Alzheimer's and couldn't make it to the wedding. She enjoyed it for about a week (my bouquet was lilies and had lots of buds, so new ones kept opening). The bridesmaids' flowers were one of my favorite details and they really make the photos look great. We didn't get floral centerpieces - but we had handpainted candles with our names, wedding date, and a Celtic eternity knot, and our family and wedding party got to take them home as keepsakes. I didn't spend a ton on my shoes, but I've already worn them a few times since the wedding, so they were worth it. I don't regret spending money on invitations, either - they did their job, so it was money well spent (we didn't spend a ridiculous amount, though).

Honestly, I don't regret spending money on anything for the wedding. The one thing that I DO regret is taking the time to cut fabric into bows for the chairs. If I had it to do again, I would have paid someone else to do it, because it wasn't worth my time or the irritation that it caused me.

Also, if I had it to do again, I would rent a minibus to transport guests. Even if I didn't need it, it would be worth the expense to have it IN CASE.

DaisypathWedding Ticker


Beachwed Posts : 782 Registered: 9/19/06
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jun 25, 2008 3:23 PM Go to message in response to: riderzblock

I thought really hard about where I wanted my budget to go beforehand, and therefore I don't regret a thing. Music was very important to us, and so I don't regret splurging on an amazing band that everyone still raves about. Decorations, I didn't really care that much about, as long as it looked nice I wasn't going to care, and so I don't regret skimping a little on this. I fell in love with a dress, I splurged a little, I don't regret it. Invites, didn't care so much, skimped a bit. The food was big for me, I really wanted guests to be well fed and happy with what they got, I don't regret spending more to make sure the food was really good.

I guess overall I don't regret a thing, and it was all worth it. I do admit that when signing the final checks, I had an "OUCH" moment, but that was quickly forgotten. I look back at the day now and the amount that it cost is forgotten, we only remember all the fabulous times, food, dancing and amazing company. It was all worth it to me.


Iheartweddings Posts : 645 Registered: 7/23/07
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jun 25, 2008 3:32 PM Go to message in response to: riderzblock

Don't get me wrong... I loved our wedding. It was absolutely perfect. But, now I'm really wishing we would have saved some of that money and used it for something like a down-payment on a house. So much of that stuff could have easily been saved...but since it was the wedding, we decided to splurge on things that we didn't have to. 

These are the things I wish we wouldn't have spent so much money on:

1. Favors. We had these really cute pearlized boxes tied with a pretty ribbon on every single person's place setting. Inside, there were some chocolates and a little note from us. I have no idea why, but people didn't even open theirs! Maybe 25% of the people appreciated them and took them home, but the other 75% weren't even opened! So, we gave them to a nursing home so that the patients there would have a little something special. But, that was definitely hundreds of dollars that we could have saved.

2. I spent a lot of money on my wedding shoes, and I ended up switching to flats right before the reception. So, definitely could have saved money on that one if I just got something cheaper.

I think that's all that I really regret wasting money on. I'll tell you what I'm GLAD we spent money on, that was totally worth it:

1. Cake. Definitely don't skimp on the cake. Ours was completely gone at the end of the night. People eat their cake. Same thing with food in general... Everyone raved about the food, and I'm glad we spent the major bucks on that aspect.

2. Flowers and lighting. I know flowers die, but come on. They're pretty, and they set the tone of the wedding. Also, we had some pink uplighting in the reception that makes EVERY PICTURE look beautiful because there was a pretty pink glow.

3. My bridesmaids' dresses and gifts. Definitely worth it to show you care about them... :)


When is my wedding
SmileSee our wedding slideshow at: http://www.josephmark.com/RyanandJennifer/


uno Posts : 619 Registered: 1/4/08
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jun 25, 2008 5:10 PM Go to message in response to: riderzblock

I think it's completely worth it.  I was pretty laid back and didn't really have any "splurge" items.  Mostly, I'd say "who is going to notice this?" if no one (like my shoes) than I'd find something I liked at a reasonable price.  I got a great deal on my centerpieces (from another bride) but to me, those are things that no one really remembers at the end of the day.  The DJ (music), cake, food, alcohol (or lack of), and if the guest had a good time will be what people remember.  Not what color the brides shoes were, what her necklace looked like, etc.  So I tried to think of my guests as much as possible, and we had a few things that were important to us. 

My advice - use your connections.  My MIL knows a girl who is an amazing flower arranger.  We went and got silk flowers from Jo Anns, Michaels, Hobby Lobby and she did a wonderful (inexpensive) job putting them together.  I got so many compliments on them.   Also, I went to highschool with my DJ's.  They had just gotten this new light system and were really excited to try it out so I got it for free.  Good luck


MrsWilliams2008 Posts : 1,431 Registered: 7/19/07
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jun 25, 2008 5:37 PM Go to message in response to: uno

We were just under our 5k budget and we didn't really splurge on anything. The only I say that I didn't have to buy were the shoes. I wore them for all of 20-30 minutes. I got TWO pictures of them before the ceremony. As soon as the ceremony was over, i got in my flip flops. Oh well, they were only $50, I might take them back if they aren't scuffed, lol. 

   Poster Formerly Known as beauti381

http://www.theknot.com/ourwedding/RyAnne Stafford&RobertWilliams, Jr



riderzblock Posts : 65 Registered: 10/30/07
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jun 26, 2008 5:35 PM Go to message in response to: MrsWilliams2008

I would like to know how you did it for $5k. How many guests and what was your venue?


LOnDZ Posts : 57 Registered: 6/10/07
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jun 29, 2008 10:59 PM Go to message in response to: riderzblock



SeasideBride06 Posts : 958 Registered: 4/14/06
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jun 30, 2008 11:06 PM Go to message in response to: riderzblock

I think those people who go so far over budget never had a real budget. It seems they just had a vague idea of how much they thought they'd spend, but never divided it up into X amount on each item. They say "well that's how much flowers cost" and don't add it up until they've already made the purchases.

As for what's worth it...guests really appreciate good food and good cake.

You want flowers for the bridesmaid's that will look good in the pictures, but you don't have to spend a lot. I just ordered a bunch of orchids (proflowers.com) and put a big bow/ribbon around each bunch at the BM's carried them on their arms. I know that saved hundreds of dollars.

Don't spend a lot on a veil, shoes you'll never wear again, fancy hose, centerpieces.

Sometimes it takes work to stick to the budget. I spend a lot of time getting us a good cake at a good price. But I found a woman who works out of her home, she charges much less than a bakery and the cake was excellent. 


OrthoRN Posts : 323 Registered: 11/24/07
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jul 5, 2008 9:51 AM Go to message in response to: riderzblock

Yes it was worth it. Our daughter's wedding for 200 = $11,000. We had a limo, buffet meal, great cake(of course i made it), wonderful professional photos, & DJ. We used silk flowers & minimal decorations. Yes, we did favors - found cream colored boxes on sale (50 for $5), made heart chocolates & wrapped them in foil. We had personalized M&Ms too! 200 favors= $100. We ordered embossed invites (wedding kit including the RSVP cards, envelopes, etc.) & printed them ourselves. Dress was only $400. Veil & accessories all found on sale. I say do it if you can. There are ways to save $$ & be just as elegant.


mrspinky Posts : 3,773 Registered: 3/14/08
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jul 7, 2008 6:39 PM Go to message in response to: riderzblock

I think the things that weren't "worth the trouble" for us:

1. The invitations. I ordered them and I could have easily have done them myself.

2. The BM jewelry. I spent a lot buying crystals and beads so they could make their own. I doubt any of them will be wearing their jewelry again. :-(

3. My BM, in the end they all looked beautiful. I don't know why I stressed over them so much. :p

Mrs. Pinky




Abc12345678 Posts : 272 Registered: 2/25/07
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jul 7, 2008 7:52 PM Go to message in response to: mrspinky



newsjunkie Posts : 3,417 Registered: 3/30/06
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jul 17, 2008 1:17 AM Go to message in response to: riderzblock

I'm trying to think back and I have to honestly say that everything we got was worth the money.  Of course, I was extremely lucky in that my parents paid for my wedding (we are very, very close) so it wasn't my money- had I had to pay for everything we wouldn't have done ANYTHING we did, we simply couldn't afford to do it.

The only thing that immediately comes to mind was the invitations.  I spent hours upon hours searching for the most perfect invites before getting completely fed up and picking something that was nice and "fine" but not what I had really wanted.  However, we ended up being able to invite a bunch of people from our B list- more than we expected- and we didn't have enough.  Since our invites were kind of expensive and could only be ordered in batches of 25 I decided to look into those "make your own" kind since DH is amazing with the computer.  Honestly- the DIY looked every bit as good as the more (much more) expensive ones.  So, if I had to do it all over again I would DEFINITELY do DIY invites from the start.  No, they didn't come with an inner and an outer envelope but so what- aside from my grandmothers I'm sure everyone else just tossed them 30 seconds after they opened them!

I am also glad we didn't spend much money on favors.  We gave out pieces of wedding cake placed in boxes with our names and wedding date engraved on them (wicked inexpensive).  Even though our wedding was small (66 guests total) I still wanted the traditional 3-tier cake plus we are in the South and just had to have a groom's cake (which we did a make your own sundae bar instead).  We knew we would have tons of cake leftover so this made perfect sense and everyone loved it.  I would NEVER spend a lot on favors- put the $$$ towards something else!


LinzZ Posts : 683 Registered: 12/13/07
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jul 20, 2008 6:23 PM Go to message in response to: newsjunkie

I'm with newsjunkie in that our wedding would have been teeny tiny if our parents hadn't offered to pay for it.

Even though I was not paying for my wedding, I was very concerned with the price of everything. Just because somebody says they'll pay for it doesn't mean you can go crazy.

Worth it:

Photographer. We paid a pretty penny for him and his work was phenomenal!

Reception site. The hall was pretty enough, but the food sold us. The restraunt associated with the site is a 5 star. The food was great.

Not Worth It:

The Limo- we only had our siblings and my cousin as attendants, but we wanted a few pics with our friends, so we got a large limo (held 15) and had them ride with us to the photo location. Looking back, it wasn't worth the money spent. I would have been much more comfortable in my own car meeting my friends there. This would have given DH and I a moment alone together. I think we needed that.

Flowers-I desperately wanted to not have flowers at my wedding, but my mom insisted. We spent $800 on flowers (eveything at the ceremony site, we reused at the reception site) and the only things I liked were the 2 bouquets and men's bouts (didn't like pew cones for what we paid for them, altar flowers, corsages, etc.).


Yesterday is History. Tomorrow is a Mystery. Today is a gift, that's why it's called the Present.


mrslilysolovely Posts : 2,130 Registered: 7/24/06
Re: Was it really "worth it"? be honest
Posted: Jul 21, 2008 6:51 PM Go to message in response to: riderzblock

Cool thread riderz!!!

Thanks for posting, I was actually re-thinking the invites I have recently completed the templates for...and I am sticking with them now.

I've had about three years to plan this wedding, and thankfully I purchased many of the decorations CHristmas-time before last and so I can write off that expeniture and look ahead for the finishing touches...now I realize that I don't need much more - none like I thought would make me happy, especially since the economy is in the toilet and we are scraping just to make it happen. You'd think I 'd not have that problem with such a long engagement, but yeah, there are things that ate away at our savings.

I'm sticking with the hershey's kisses wrapped in tulle circles for the favors - sorry that the p[eople didn't bother to even open such nice favors - yeesh!



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