Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!! Tomorrow!!! pg 3

Online Users: 0 guest(s), 0 user(s). Replies: 47

Bride2BeN2009 Posts : 27 Registered: 1/4/08
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!!
Posted: Jun 19, 2008 8:51 AM Go to message in response to: Brooke051609

Hi there,

My fiancee and I moved in together about a week ago. I don't see anything wrong w/ it...I can't give you an experience yet b/c like I said it's only been a week, but it's been great so far. I always wanted to wait until marriage to move in together, but I finally decided to give it a try and do it beforehand b/c everyone that I know that has lived together b4 marriage are still in love and happy as ever. It might even bring a couple closer. As far as morals/parents' thoughts, I decided this: it's not about sex. If we wanted to move in together just to have sex, it'd be ridiculous to rent an apartment to do so (we were living at our parents' houses bfore the move)...anyone who wants to have sex will do it anywhere. You don't have to be living together to do so. :)

Reply

Susan85 Posts : 8 Registered: 7/29/08
Re: Move in together before married???
Posted: Jul 29, 2008 10:59 PM Go to message in response to: Kat78

Exactly why my boyfriend and I moved in together. We are already, what I like to say, "engaged to be engaged" and it just made sense. We figured we would only have our own places for appearances anyways, so we just saved money.

Reply

Susan85 Posts : 8 Registered: 7/29/08
Re: Move in together before married???
Posted: Jul 29, 2008 11:06 PM Go to message in response to: Jade1107

Thank you for adding the part of the "newness" article! I've been wondering about this too.

Reply


Brooke051609 Posts : 723 Registered: 12/31/07
Re: Move in together before married???
Posted: Jul 30, 2008 12:33 PM Go to message in response to: Susan85

  Hi again ladies! So we're down to less than a month! FH moves in August 23rd!! I'm just getting excited now (thanks to all your great advice)! FMIL still thinks we'll be "living in sin" but that's her opinion. This is a necessary move, we cannot financially afford to live in different apartments anymore, and when we move away from this town we'll be getting a place together in that next town as well. So what's 3 months difference? Anyway, getting off subject! Our biggest dilemma now is where to put all our stuff! My place is so small, we need to fit a queen bed, his clothes, recliner, it's going to be COZY! haha But only 3 months, so it shouldn't be horrible. Anyway, basically just wanted to say and let you know where we are with it! Thanks again for all your advice!!

Reply

issa Posts : 3 Registered: 7/31/08
Re: Move in together before married???
Posted: Jul 31, 2008 4:03 AM Go to message in response to: Susan85

same here...we saved alot of money movin in together and we are so much happier.


"Love bears all things, believes all thing, hopes all things, and endures all things  Corinthians 13:4-8"

Reply

kimmee Posts : 13 Registered: 5/28/08
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!!
Posted: Aug 5, 2008 10:50 AM Go to message in response to: Brooke051609

I don't live with my fiance.   And yeah, it is a headache and costs driving back and forth to each other's place (especially since we both live an hour apart), but I'm ok with it.   We have talked about moving in together, but I've already told him that I wouldn't.   Part of me wants to be a little traditional, I guess.  

My brother and his wife lived together before they got married and they've been married for about 3 years now.   According to my sil, it was nice getting to know each other's habits before getting married.

But, for me, as inconvenient as it is, I'm just not going to move in with him.  But, I don't have that much longer before we get married.   It's only about 4 months.   That I can deal with.

One thing I'd be afraid of about moving in, especially if I were young, would be that they guy would get a little too comfortable and would put off setting a date.  


 

Reply


nanette927 Posts : 1,748 Registered: 1/28/08
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!!
Posted: Aug 5, 2008 11:25 AM Go to message in response to: kimmee

We've been together for almost 3 years and we lived accross town from eachother. I worked near his home and he worked near my home.  Well since I was renting and he owned his home this past March we decided to live in his house together.  I didn't realize how much money we save.  That and it's true you do learn alot more about eachother.  We know that there are no more lonely nights.  And as far as the newlywed thing goes, it only goes if you guys let it go.  We still have a "date night". And as far as our honeymoon, well we aren't comming home for 3 days.

Good luck on whatever you decide.        


NANETTE' & JAMES

 TO BE UNITIED AS ONE SEPTEMBER 27, 2008 

CUTE

 

Reply


dyminbride Posts : 87 Registered: 5/6/08
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!!
Posted: Aug 5, 2008 11:35 AM Go to message in response to: Brooke051609

KissMy FH and I have lived together for the entirety of our relationship.  We were freidns for 3 mths before getting together and then when we did it just clicked so perfectly that after one week he asked me to move in and it felt so right i said yes and then BAm we have been together ever since.  BUT we both knew we both wanted the same thing, the marriage, the kids, all that.  He is kind of old fashioned in the way of he wouldnt have a child until he got married and stuff like that and before the wedding we will abstain for 3mths before so it can be all new again that kind of thing.  Im a hopeless romatic so Im all down with that :)

 

It all boils down to how you really feel inside.  And don't let friends or family tell you its wrong.  I had family make comments about living in sin but you know what it didn't matter to me,  we loved each other and we are our own family and we have been very happy and it just felt natural.  So, if it feels right for you two not to wait then i say go for it, especially now witht he cost of things going crazy.  Good luck :)


Call me  MRS ROBINSON!!Kiss

 

 

Reply

hellokitty4ever Posts : 740 Registered: 6/6/07
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!!
Posted: Aug 6, 2008 6:12 PM Go to message in response to: dyminbride

Grrrrr!!!!  This is what I said to my mother... "Mom, since when does 'tradition' make it right?"  Just because it's traditional for a man and a woman to not "live together" before marriage doesn't make living together pre-marriage is wrong.  Uh...women traditonally stay home, took care of the house, the hubby, and the ka-zank load of kids...does that make it right and my being child-less, work-bound wrong???  Tradition sometimes rules out logic and practicality.  I say, if living together is practical, then heck, the more power to you.  Hmm...I don't know why but I think I sound like I'm ranting just a wee bit.  Ooops.  Sorry. 

To the OP:  congrats on your recent move!  Best of luck!

 


Reply


Brooke051609 Posts : 723 Registered: 12/31/07
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!! Tomorrow!!! pg 3
Posted: Aug 23, 2008 12:16 AM Go to message in response to: Brooke051609

  So girls, tomorrow (well technically today since it is EARLY Saturday morning) is the big day, FH moves in!! We moved in some of his stuff tonight, just small stuff, clothes, etc. But we move all the big furniture and what not in tomorrow. So tonight's my last night as a single woman! haha I'm really looking forward to it though. Thanks for the tips and advice, I'll welcome anymore this upcoming week!! :)

Reply


CatStandish Posts : 2,766 Registered: 6/20/08
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!! Tomorrow!!! pg 3
Posted: Aug 23, 2008 1:46 PM Go to message in response to: Brooke051609

The first marriage, we didn't live together before hand.  I can tell you this right now.   There would not have been a wedding had we lived together.  He had his 'out' persona and his 'home' persona, and the two were not compatible.  I don't think he did it to be dishonest and conniving...I think that is just how he was.  I vowed after that divorce that I would live with my future husband before we wed.

My FH and I live together now.  We're putting what he used to pay for rent towards our wedding.   So far, it's been pretty smooth, but I do need to move a lot of stuff so that he has a space.  We have plans to redo a room together, and once we do, I'll have the room I need to get my stuff consolidated.

 


Misty

Create a wedding ticker

http://johnandmisty.ourweddingday.com

Reply

Knoxvegas Posts : 951 Registered: 9/12/07
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!! Tomorrow!!! pg 3
Posted: Aug 24, 2008 10:47 PM Go to message in response to: Brooke051609

Yay! Congrats!

On the storage issue, we rented a storage locker and it was just big enough and is like $40 a month.

To the PP about him "not setting a date" if you move in, we waited until we had a date to make the move. It felt more appropriate because we were no longer in that engaged "holding pattern" and had started to plan (already booked the venue before I stepped in the door). 

 


 

"Love is not a matter of counting the years -- it's making the years count."

-Wolfman Jack Smith

Reply


mrspinky Posts : 3,773 Registered: 3/14/08
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!! Tomorrow!!! pg 3
Posted: Aug 25, 2008 1:16 PM Go to message in response to: Brooke051609

So how did the first weekend together go?

Mrs. Pinky

 




Our Wedding Website

Reply


Brooke051609 Posts : 723 Registered: 12/31/07
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!! Tomorrow!!! pg 3
Posted: Aug 26, 2008 6:56 PM Go to message in response to: mrspinky

  The weekend went great! The move was very easy, his parents came down and helped and actually no drama, went very smoothly!! We were both very happy. And the place looks great! I actually like it better than before! But I LOVE coming home to him. It's wonderful. So far no quarrels about things, just being patient with one another and figuring out each other's schedules. But so far, so good!!! :)

Reply


mrspinky Posts : 3,773 Registered: 3/14/08
Re: Move in together before married??? UPDATE!!!! Tomorrow!!! pg 3
Posted: Aug 26, 2008 7:04 PM Go to message in response to: Brooke051609

Brooke - that's awesome! I too love being home and having EH be there with me everyday!!! Just be patient like you have been and try not to nag. That's my big problem. Keep us updated!

Mrs. Pinky

 




Our Wedding Website

Reply
RSS

Thank You
for Signing Up!

Check your e-mail inbox for the latest updates from brides.com

Give a Subscription to Brides Magazine as a Gift
Subscribe to Brides magazine