Etiquette Question ?

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crkshnks79 Posts : 12 Registered: 3/30/08
Etiquette Question ?
Posted: Jun 9, 2008 2:13 PM

Ok so I have a question for everyone , and Id really appreciate your opinions :) FOr my bridal shower , while I appreciate anyone who decided to give me a gift , I was wondering if there was a way to say that my FH and I prefer money over gift certificates ?? Because we have children ( this is our first marriage ) we would prefer to have money to help w expenses , rather then gift cards , which of course we would appreciate but we need the money more ... IS that too rude to ask ? Because I dont want to offend anyone or come off as a b%$#^!! I have been reading up on etiquette and they say no depending on the way you word it , but Im still unsure . Any hlep would seriously be appreciated Thank you so much
Lauren Kiss

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Jen415 Posts : 255 Registered: 3/7/07
Re: Etiquette Question ?
Posted: Jun 9, 2008 2:14 PM Go to message in response to: crkshnks79

There is no proper way to ask for money over gift cards.  Just be thankful for your guests' generosity!

May 24, 2008
Daisypath Ticker

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crkshnks79 Posts : 12 Registered: 3/30/08
Re: Etiquette Question ?
Posted: Jun 9, 2008 3:36 PM Go to message in response to: Jen415

Thank you for the advice !! 
Lauren Kiss

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myra Posts : 5,550 Registered: 3/28/06
Re: Etiquette Question ?
Posted: Jun 10, 2008 7:48 PM Go to message in response to: crkshnks79

A shower is about gifts. Your best option is to register somewhere. On the registry, there usually will be the option to give gift cards, as well as actual, physical gifts. Register for cash? No way! If you can't afford "expenses," and your children come first, perhaps you should consider downsizing your wedding plans.

myra at www.classysassyweddings.com

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DawnaCrystal Posts : 990 Registered: 4/7/08
Re: Etiquette Question ?
Posted: Jun 10, 2008 8:06 PM Go to message in response to: myra

From what someone else was telling me Bed Bath and Beyond will take anything bought off your registry as a return or an exchange. I don't know how true that is but you can check. However, I hate to give or recieve money for any event (including gift cards) I just think it is tacky all around.

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crkshnks79 Posts : 12 Registered: 3/30/08
Re: Etiquette Question ?
Posted: Jun 10, 2008 9:53 PM Go to message in response to: DawnaCrystal

Thank you for that idea , I dont usually give money or gift cards either , I like to put thought into those kind of things but if that what someone asks for Ill do it, so I was unsure . I was reading some of these bridal sites and some of them are saying that its ok for things like that , but I wasnt feeling completely sure of it myself ?? So I was wondering what others thought who were also getting married but I dont think that even if it was ok that there was a way to asked that in a decent fashion . I noticed also that alot of people can register they honeymoon and people can put money towards that as well , my friend did that for her wedding but again Im not sure how I feel about that . Personally I dont think we are going to have one and maybe for our 10 year anniversary go somewhere nice . Again thank you for your thought , they were helpful :)

 

~Lauren ~

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crkshnks79 Posts : 12 Registered: 3/30/08
Re: Etiquette Question ?
Posted: Jun 10, 2008 9:58 PM Go to message in response to: myra

Thank you for the advice ! I believe your right , it didnt sit well w me but I figured Id ask for peoples opinions . Unfortunetly we cant down size because of the size of our families , but I have cut out other costs such as photography . My mom works w a woman whose husband is a wedding photographer and he is doing us a favor by taking cetain pictures for free and my dad said he can cover the rest because thats his hobby . Also we cut out transportation , we literally live right around the corner ,so whats the point ? We arent going to go away on a honeymoon as well , and might do that down the road for an anniversary . Again thank you for your help , I appreciate it !

 

~Lauren ~

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CheerfulMe Posts : 11 Registered: 8/7/08
Re: Etiquette Question ?
Posted: Sep 5, 2008 4:23 PM Go to message in response to: crkshnks79

There is absolutely a way to do it!!!

I think if cash is what you need, then cash is what you should get! I went to a wedding shower themed "wishing well" and the bride asked the guests to write a card and include a monetary gift, at the party we all dropped the cards in a beautiful wishing well she made. No one complained and to be honest it was so much easier  and it felt good to give her what she wanted.

Another friend just wrote it on her invitiation.

You will always have the people who complain and find it rude but at the end of the day would you rather shrug off such comments or end up with loads of unwanted gifts?

I'd say be brave, step out, and do what you need to!! =)

good luck with everything

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