Young brides...

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MrsRicecake Posts : 700 Registered: 2/2/08
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 19, 2008 6:02 PM Go to message in response to: ryanne

I think I would just say that we found an apartment and moved in. But be prepared for them to question when and why. If it were me I would tell them that I am a big girl about to get married and I made a decision that best suited the situation. But thats just me and my parents are used to me not doing what they want me to do and doing what I want because I want to. I hope that helps!! Good luck!

Going to the chapel and we're gonna get married! December 27, 2008!

http://alaireandclayton.weddings.com

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SammiAnn Posts : 114 Registered: 3/4/08
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 20, 2008 2:23 PM Go to message in response to: MrsRicecake

I agree with FMR.  And definitely be prepared for the questions.

I know that's not a lot, but I think that what FMR said sounds very reasonable.
June 7, 2008...here I come!

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MrsRicecake Posts : 700 Registered: 2/2/08
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 20, 2008 7:26 PM Go to message in response to: SammiAnn

Oh my goodness! I need to vent about my FMIL!! She is such a bitch! She sucks as a mom and as a human! I know that sounds really harsh but right now I am so angry!!

My FH talked to his mom yesterday and mentioned that he split his life insurance between her and me 50/50. She had to be the main person on it because we arent married yet, but he felt that I needed to be taken care of just in case something happens between now and then. SHE FLIPPED OUT!! What the hell? So he tells her that I am the one that is taking care of everything while he is gone. Then she flipped out even more!

For some reason he feels like he owes them something. If they need something then he makes an effort to help. They were supposed to get billed for his transmission and he repaid by buying them stuff for their log truck ($2000) and they dont care that he is still owing on it! My parents would never have let me even start repaying them until they got billed in the first place! So maybe thats why I dont understand them! He can NEVER go to them for help, they will just make him feel guilty! Oh and his truck he asked them to help him sell it while he is in Florida, they told him that he doesnt need to! They even had the nerve to ask if they could use it as a trade in to get THEM a new car! WHAT? Oh and we kinda need to save money to start a home and to pay for this wedding and they told them not to! Just be a kid and fun!! Ok I dont mind if you splurge once in awhile but just to blow your whole pay check!! AHHH!! Im just so frustrated!! I dont know if its just because they are COMPLETELY differet from his, but I just dont understand them!!


Going to the chapel and we're gonna get married! December 27, 2008!

http://alaireandclayton.weddings.com

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krista210 Posts : 450 Registered: 7/14/07
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 20, 2008 11:00 PM Go to message in response to: MrsRicecake

FMR that sucks! I cant believe that they would do that and she would freak out because her son wants to take care of his FUTURE WIFE. I hope everything works out for you

I got my hair trial this past saturday but I dont have pictures yet. I will post them, I LOVED the way that it turned out :)

One of FHs aunt asked FMIL if her son could bring his GF of like 4 months because she thinks that "matt and laura might think they want to get married if they go to a wedding together" THE NERVE!! So thankfully FMIL realized that this was a lame excuse and especially since we told matt that he couldnt bring a date BEFORE we sent out the invitations and he was fine with it. So FMIL is going to call and let them know that she cant come. I'm glad it hasnt been worse than this yet!!

How is everyone else doing? Oh, Ryanne, did you tell your parents about the apartment yet?? I hope that it didnt turn into a blow up!


DaisypathWedding Ticker

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ryanne Posts : 1,042 Registered: 4/27/06
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 12:15 AM Go to message in response to: krista210

I haven't told them yet. I got all geared up to tell my mom today and forgot that she went out of town with her step mom to go see her step brother so...yeah. My sis thinks that its a bad idea b/c she thinks they'll try and stop her from being in the wedding. Which won't happen, she's legally able to leave and do what she wants, so yeah. lol. But they'll probably tell me they wont come to the wedding and that the kids can't be in it....again.

I'm just so sick of them. Grr.


 

Our Wedding Website: www.mywedding.com/chrisandryanne

 

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Charlotte09 Posts : 1,021 Registered: 2/22/08
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 12:41 AM Go to message in response to: ryanne

Ryanne, I wish you could just steal your younger siblings for the day of your wedding just to make sure they can be in it! If you think they are going to fly of the handle like that maybe you should keep it hush hush because I am sure you really want everyone in the wedding and avoiding conflict might be best. Do you have another relative that could talk a bit of sense into your parents and calm them down enough to at least not make extreme threats and stuff surrounding your wedding? 

Also ladies I just posted a thread with the title "is this too expensive?" or something like that. It has the quote I got today on my cakes and a photography costs and I was just wondering if they are a bit much or not since I have no idea usually how much wedding vendors costs. So if you have any input go to the thread and let me know, thanks.  

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MermaidBride08 Posts : 554 Registered: 9/26/06
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 9:36 AM Go to message in response to: ryanne

Omg, I am FREAKING out. My dress isn't even close to being finished and I only have 8 days left. And I never got a change to talk to the linen company either. Ugh, I SO do not want creams and brown linens, that would totally screw up my decorations. And I still need to finish the centerpieces and do the guest favours. I'm going to pull my hair out! lol

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Charlotte09 Posts : 1,021 Registered: 2/22/08
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 11:46 AM Go to message in response to: MermaidBride08

I am sorry MermaidBride! Get on top of the vendors and see if you can recruit friends, mom, ect to help you with the favors and things like that! 

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krista210 Posts : 450 Registered: 7/14/07
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 1:14 PM Go to message in response to: Charlotte09

Charlotte I checked out the other thread - I think the cakes are a good price. Although if you need to save money then I would just cut out the grooms cake - we are not having one at all. Photographer I think is expensive considering there is no album but on the other hand a good deal becasue you get printing rights with edited photos. Good luck!!

Mermaid I hope you get everything figured out - I think you are the first girl on this thread to get married, I can't wait to hear how it goes!!


DaisypathWedding Ticker

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Charlotte09 Posts : 1,021 Registered: 2/22/08
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 1:32 PM Go to message in response to: krista210

Thanks for reading the thread and for the advice. What is funny is that the grooms cake is only $200ish. That is because it feeds only 50 people. It is the wedding cake that made the prices go up so high because of it serving 270. FH is so excited about the grooms cake I cannot take it away from him. We talked and are going to stick with the cake and be picky about some other areas. 

As far as the photographer I am not sure and want to talk to my mom about it because she will be scrapbooking our actual album. I have not even contacted him so who knows, I could talk to him and he could give me a better price or raise his price, or just be someone I do not want to work with. We are having some real trouble trying to find a decently priced photographer that is for sure. Some either charge an okay amount but you dont get much out of it, plus we really do want those printing rights. Or the charge an arm and a leg for it all. I might just have to call some places and see if they can give me a specialized package. I would really like to only spend 1,000 but I did budget 2,000 just in case.  

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krista210 Posts : 450 Registered: 7/14/07
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 1:53 PM Go to message in response to: Charlotte09

yeah I guess everyone has that one thing in their wedding that they splurge on. Ours is the photography. We paid 2500 for ours and we are so excited about her. We got engagement session, boudoir session, all day at the wedding, 3 11x14 prints and 1 20x24 print as well as an album. We dont get printing rights but we can buy single prints for I think 25 bucks apiece. So we can buy like our favorite one so it stays safe forever. I'm so excited about her! She already told us that our engagement session was her favorite of all last year so we're thrilled that she likes us and thinks we photograph well.

Let us know when you talk to him and see what happens!


DaisypathWedding Ticker

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ryanne Posts : 1,042 Registered: 4/27/06
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 1:56 PM Go to message in response to: Charlotte09

Charlotte--I wish I could steal them too!! lol. I'm not so worried about the sister who is my MOH. She has made it very clear that she is going to be in the wedding regardless of what mom and dad say. She's paid for her dress in full and is planning the bachelorette now and my parents have said nothing to her about it. What I'm mostly worried about is the younger ones who really don't have a choice but to do what my parents say. I think they'll throw a fit if my parents tell them they can't be in the wedding, and the thought of a mutiny of my siblings just makes me laugh. :) But anyway.

My great aunt has tried to talk to my parents, but they tend to not listen to her because even though she is a very wise lady with lots and lots of common sense (something my parents really do lack...), she hasn't been married and doesn't have kids. Well, she was married twice, but neither marriage lasted. She's just one of those people who is better off being single and living life how SHE wants to live it, without working around someone else. I've considered asking my dad's parents to talk to them, but I'm doubtful that they will. They tend to just not take sides and keep quiet about things.

So what I think I am going to do is tell them that we've decided on a place, and that its all in the works now. And then at the beginning of next month, I'm going to tell them that we moved in because its easier to do it now than it would after the wedding because of FHs work. I hate having to fabricate a story like that, having to lie, but I really don't know what else to tell them.

Thats the thing about my relationship with my parents. I'm always afraid to tell them stuff because of how I know they'll react. Its always highly dramatic, and focused on how it all makes them look. It's really irritating.

But anyway, that's the plan. :) lol. Thanks girls!


 

Our Wedding Website: www.mywedding.com/chrisandryanne

 

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ryanne Posts : 1,042 Registered: 4/27/06
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 2:43 PM Go to message in response to: MrsRicecake

FMR--I feel SO sorry for you! Your FILs sound a lot like my parents, and your parents sound a lot like my FILs! lol.

About the life insurance, are you guys making you the beneficiary (100%) once you get married? If not, I think you should definitely consider at least bumping you up to 75 or 80%. Reason being, if you have children and something happens to him, YOU are going to need every bit of that money--not his mom! Especially if your FH is still in debt over paying his parents back!

I'm assuming that by saying that you are taking care of everything, that your FH has given you the power of attorney. Keep it that way! Don't let his mom bully y'all into doing otherwise. If she has POA, she would be able to do what she wants with his truck. Not a good situation.

But bottom line, it sounds like there needs to be some cutting of the apron strings. I'm not saying that your FH is a mommas boy or anything, I'm just saying that it sounds like he's let them bully him--and you--up to this point, and it needs to stop now, otherwise its just going to get worse. You'll end up like the Everybody Loves Raymond family!


 

Our Wedding Website: www.mywedding.com/chrisandryanne

 

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ryanne Posts : 1,042 Registered: 4/27/06
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 3:28 PM Go to message in response to: ryanne

Hey girls! FH and I picked out our wedding bands officially today! lol. We were supposed to go get them, but it didn't happen so we got online and looked instead, and picked out what we wanted.

Here's mine. It's 1/6th of a carat in 14 K white gold. It's much cheeper than the one I originally wanted, but the quality isn't much different and its a higher total weight. I think I did good. :)

/images/products/0801/080181528_MV_TB.jpg

And here is his. I know its from Sears, but he needed the tungstun, and I saw this one at work (I sell jewelry there) and I found a couple others at other stores, and he likes this one the best. Plus, I get a discount on it! Dang it. The picture won't paste. Okay. Here's the link to it instead.

http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_04428565000P


 

Our Wedding Website: www.mywedding.com/chrisandryanne

 

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krista210 Posts : 450 Registered: 7/14/07
Re: Young brides...
Posted: May 21, 2008 3:38 PM Go to message in response to: ryanne

ooOOOoooo pretty!! I like it. Mine is similar to that I guess, well, maybe not. I cant find a picture of it on the internet. It has 6 raised diamonds in the center and then three channel set on each side and it is curved to fit against my ering. But the idea is very similar to yours. I CANT WAIT TO WEAR IT!!!!!
DaisypathWedding Ticker

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