18 children?

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luvathena Posts : 929 Registered: 12/10/07
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 9, 2008 8:57 PM Go to message in response to: uno

I just saw a clip of the interview on tv while I was reading this. The mom looks like she is stuck in the 80's!! Which is probably the last time she had time to look at any fashion mags. Or maybe they don't believe in that. Whatever- I just hope the mom survives. Dad looks like he would be clueless if she was gone. Did you see his reaction to her news? He had to force a smile. He probably can't wait to go to work everyday. 

Re: BC. There has always been a church approved method of birth control. It's what my grandparents used- separate bedrooms. Ha Ha Ha. Just seems like a waste of god's gift of medical knowledge to refuse to take control over your choices.

But really, as long as they provide for them and don't abuse them, it doesn't bother me. I just think it's weird. (oh-and I disagree with not having any of them build the house- for the teens I think that's good work- they learn a craft and self-confidence-always a good thing).

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PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,446 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 9, 2008 9:12 PM Go to message in response to: luvathena

IMHO, I just think it's flat out irresponsible in this day and time.  

There's already too many people on the earth if you want to get right down to it.  And I understand that they can live how they want, but I have serious issues with the fact that they are on #18 and are home schooling.  As someone has already pointed out, the older kids help with the younger kids and the one on one time with the parents has to be limited.

Someone mentioned the Extreme Home Makeover edition and if it's the one I'm thinking about they adopted all of those kids and they were groups of siblings that would have been split up otherwise.  And while that's still a lot, those kids are probably better off then they were in the system.  And they were attending public school so they were getting socialized.

So I'll hope that this is the same for these kids.  But I wonder.... 


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MissR Posts : 139 Registered: 7/17/06
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 9, 2008 10:37 PM Go to message in response to: uno

I am so glad everyone is agreeing on this crazy topic!  I actually watched the documentary about this family.  I have to say that the worst part of all is that they pair the kids up in a buddy system, all the babies have an older buddy.  The mom ignores the younger kids and pretty much just leaves them to their buddies.  Yes she homeschools the kids but not on anything academic, on the show she was teaching them about money and bankruptcy, what kind of lesson is that to teach kids, it's weird.  Apparently they saved money and have no credit cards so they have money to support themselves.  I just think they are crazy!  

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B2B999 Posts : 700 Registered: 12/7/07
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 9, 2008 10:43 PM Go to message in response to: CyclistLover

I have not seen this family and I definitely agree that there are people that have more children then they can care for and that is irresponsible (be that 1 or 20)

I do not see a problem with having children contribute to the running of the family. Every member of my family had chores which were always age appropriate.

If this family has more children then they can reasonably care for then shame on them. However, working in the family court system let me tell you that I know and have seen many parents who could not care for the one child that they brought into this world.


When is my wedding

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futuremrsmason Posts : 239 Registered: 3/21/08
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 9, 2008 11:08 PM Go to message in response to: B2B999

I totally agree with you! and I really don't see why no one else really has considered that.

I have experience in child welfare (intern-work related), and there are several people with only one or two children (the so-called "perfect" number) who cannot take care of them. Number of children has nothing to do with it, its about the parents.I myself am the oldest of 5*, and that is the smallest in my church. I remember people at our OTHER church raising an eyebrow when my mom was pregnant with number five. But, I could imagine the world without my sunshine sister Rinnah. Any more than I could imagine our pastor's family, the one with 9 children, without any of their darlings, and neither could they.

I also think its beautiful when people are willing to take on sibling groups, either for foster care or adoption. These children's lives are devastated when they are separated, so MUCHO kudos to those couples!

Clearly, the majority of those posting are from small families, if any siblings at all.In this case, they are taking care of their children. Yes, some of the elder children are responsible for the younger, but you know what? that's a FAMILY. Just because other families function(or don't function, rather) in a different way doesn't make it wrong...I totally understand not everyone being right to have several children, if any at all. But, I definitely say don't knock it 'til you try it. Because, until you've lived in a larger family, and had true experience, you have no idea how it works, and how amazing it can be.

However, on the Duggar, someone mentioned she dressed like she was from the '80's. Personally, I didn't know that modest and feminine was '80's style.
I know I like to rock jeans and a tank, but I think their family looks nice, and the children are very polite and well puttogether. And, if that's a bi product of home education (which, being a former home-educated student, who did the public school thing for a while, and knowing several of those who are home educated), then our nation could definitely use more of it!
I'd much rather see girls look like young ladies at that age than mini teens with huge amounts of make up and dressing like a pussycat doll. But, that's just me.

*note: I consider my family size moderate. But that could be just what I am used to :) my bio father also has four other children, one of which was born still, the other was a "mistake" with a random girl in a bar, 3 mo before he married my step-mom.

Another note: my mom and step-dad would have had more, but still-birth run higher in our family. There is never any risk to the mothers, but I would have had 3 other siblings. I can't help but wonder how different my life would be with those three lil ones to love.


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Message was edited by: futuremrsmason

Message was edited by: futuremrsmason

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futuremrsperry Posts : 1,904 Registered: 4/23/06
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 9, 2008 11:14 PM Go to message in response to: uno

I saw the article too.  I think they are pretty well off actually.  My big worry is the health of the mother.  She is what 44 and still having kids!  I'm sorry but there is just too much risk there.  Don't they know she could die from this!!   I have seen the show and the kids do not have much of a childhood.  It was very hard to watch.  

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PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,446 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 9, 2008 11:20 PM Go to message in response to: futuremrsmason

Wow, great assumption about the PP being from small families.  If you had read all of the replies, you would know that they are not.  I am, but I also have a HUGE immediate first cousin family that I love and was raised with.  And a number of my friends who were one of ten siblings have decided to have NO kids, adopt or have 1-2 kids because they felt they were raised with too many kids.

Regardless, I still state that in this day and age, we are over populated.  The Earth as a whole is overpopulated. 

Supposedly they are living debt free now.  How are their kids going to pursue further education?  State wide help is nearly gone at this point.  What other aspects of their family will they sell to afford this life?  Is that taking care of them, or foisting them on society?  

I don't know that I know what will happen.  But I hope there isn't a story about one of their kids snapping.  Yes it's negative and it's nothing that I would ever wish on someone.  But their lifestyle seems so cult-like.  And someone snapping seems to be every other news story nowadays, so yeah, I'm cynical.


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MiJoMy Posts : 245 Registered: 2/15/07
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 10, 2008 12:09 AM Go to message in response to: uno

Personally I think its pretty sickening. I know its everyone's right to believe or not believe in BC and thats fine. But what about Natural Family Planning?? The Catholic church teaches this and encourages this method. I feel like this is bordering on irresponsible

They are full gospel Pentecostal, (hence the long hair and skirts on the girls) they do not believe in natural family planning. They believe sex is for procreation only so having sex when you know you cannot be knocked up is a sin. I know a family like them who lives here. They do not have 18 but they prolly would if she had started younger and all the kids came to term. The only reason they stopped is that the last child had Down syndrome and a variety of over problems. She was getting too old. Now they just stopped having sex.
Congrats and Best of Luck to All.

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coastiebride Posts : 1,365 Registered: 3/26/07
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 10, 2008 12:54 AM Go to message in response to: MiJoMy

Im sorry if this has already been talked about. But this really strikes a personal note with me, how one woman can have 18 children who has soo many she has to schedule time with them (am i correct? i havn't seen it yet) But other women want just one child and can not concive or conceives and has miscarriages after miscarriages, and want to have children not because God has told her to have children and lack of belief in BC or other methods but a personal emotional feeling of wanting and needing a child 

 Lets not all get caught up in our wedding. Remember we should not only be planning for a our wedding but more so we should be planning for  our marriage. More so then fighting over shades of peach, tuxs, cake flavors and only god knows what else. Because the next morning it is over, guests are gone the flowers have died the cake well lets face it 1/2 of it was tossed out. Cinderella is still a maid, the limo is now a pumpkin And there is life to face ok after wild crazy monkey sex for 7 nights straight, lets not kid out selfs there are priorities After its all gone there's still bills to pay and a job to go back to

Going to the Chapel December 6th 2008

Love is a four-letter word spelled G-I-V-E

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PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,446 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 10, 2008 1:11 AM Go to message in response to: coastiebride

Coastie- That has been touched upon fleetingly, but you did it directly.  And I agree, whole heartedly.  one PP suggested that she be a surrogate..

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Charlotte09 Posts : 1,021 Registered: 2/22/08
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 10, 2008 1:28 AM Go to message in response to: PharmToxGirl

Does any one else see similarities between this family and the families at the FLDS compound that was just raided? I know there is only one wife and it is not a polygamy issue. But basically the woman's only responsibility is to have child after child. Then all the kids are each others care takers and friends and their are, what seems like, secluded from the outside world. To top things off it seems like the parents like to use religion as an excuse. And even the clothing. It just seems far to similar the only thing missing is a few more wives. 

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Charlotte09 Posts : 1,021 Registered: 2/22/08
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 10, 2008 1:33 AM Go to message in response to: Charlotte09

One more thing. It can only be a matter of time before this mom has an emergency during pregnancy and either harms herself or her child. I seriously would not be surprised if her next child (or any after that) is born with problems. Not that babies that have challenges should not have a life, but it seems so irresponsible for her to have so many children already and decide to keep taking risks with her life as well as risking bringing in another child that might really be harmed by her age and a high risk pregnancy. She had 17, why does she think it is okay to gamble and have #18? Like someone else said, there are many couples who try forever and cannot get pregnant, this does not mean other people should stop after having one kid, but she has crossed the line now. 

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PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,446 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 10, 2008 1:35 AM Go to message in response to: Charlotte09

Well, my understanding that once a female was able to have kids she was 'married'off, regardless of incest.

So I do see some differences, but overall no I don't see differences.  They are maintaining their own community. 

You have a point, 


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49ersfanatic Posts : 581 Registered: 3/30/06
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 10, 2008 10:00 AM Go to message in response to: uno

Thank you for starting this topic. I was going to start one myself. I actually did 9 months ago when Michelle Duggar had her 17th child. Seriously when is enough enough? These people just are not right. At the rate they're going they're going to run out of names that start with a J. I can't believe she is pregnant again.


DH and I Rolled the Dice and Took a Gamble at Marriage on July 15, 2006 at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas! Viva Las VegasLaughing

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MiJoMy Posts : 245 Registered: 2/15/07
Re: 18 children?
Posted: May 10, 2008 10:42 AM Go to message in response to: 49ersfanatic

In this country we will never tell people they are not allowed to give birth to more children. There would be rioting in the streets.

However we have no problem telling women they HAVE to have a baby.


Congrats and Best of Luck to All.

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