Garter Toss! Save me!

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nickakels Posts : 71 Registered: 1/3/08
Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 9, 2008 10:02 AM

Am I the only one whose concerned at all about frumpy old relatives and protective parents seeing my husband's face up my dress??

I'm the oldest of my siblings, so my parents and grandparents are in "but you're our little baby" mode.

Any advice?

question 2: lots of garters come in sets of 2: one to keep, one to toss. which one do you wear? I want to keep that one, so does FH just pull the other out of his pocket to toss? AmI missing something?

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cristine Posts : 45 Registered: 7/5/07
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 9, 2008 10:26 AM Go to message in response to: nickakels

I opted out of the whole garter toss and bouquet toss.  Instead we are going to do a longevity/anniversary dance.  

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July4thBride Posts : 381 Registered: 9/24/07
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 9, 2008 10:31 AM Go to message in response to: nickakels

If you don't want to skip this tradition altogether, you could always just make sure you wear the garter not that high up on your leg so that he can simply reach it without having to put his face up your dress. 

I'm not sure about the sets of two...mine is just the one.  You could always have the one to give away somewhere easy for him to reach on your leg, or easy for you to slip to him while he's pretending to retrieve it in a tasteful, non-embarrasing way.

Good luck!


When is my wedding 

                07.04.08   

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myra Posts : 5,550 Registered: 3/28/06
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 9, 2008 2:01 PM Go to message in response to: nickakels

I agree, that whole "garter grope" thing is just gross. If I were you, I'd skip it. Lots of today's brides are just saying no to the whole thing.

myra at www.classysassyweddings.com

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ASE Posts : 58 Registered: 9/21/07
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 9, 2008 4:44 PM Go to message in response to: nickakels

We're not doing the garter toss either but are doing the bouquet toss. I brought up the idea to my fiance of presenting the bouquet to the couple who's been married the longest but he didn't like the idea. I would just feel really uncomfortable being in front of everyone and having the garter taken off my leg..lol. And my dad strongly dislikes the whole concept. I was worried that people would notice that we didn't do it (because every wedding I've been to has had one) so it's nice to see that I'm not alone and it's perfectly normal not to have a garter or bouquet toss.
"Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans" ~John Lennon

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stunnedb2b Posts : 129 Registered: 2/19/07
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 9, 2008 6:20 PM Go to message in response to: nickakels

We just discussed this today and we're are NOT doing a garter toss.  However, H2B says he would like me to throw my bouquet.  I'm going to have to think about that.

AntonetteSurprised

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Kat78 Posts : 189 Registered: 2/9/08
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 9, 2008 6:36 PM Go to message in response to: nickakels

you wear both... the one you wanna keep up high and the one that is being thrown down low

 When is my wedding

"say i love you today cuz tomorrow you may not have the chance"

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nickakels Posts : 71 Registered: 1/3/08
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 9, 2008 8:13 PM Go to message in response to: Kat78

does he take both off?

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2010bride Posts : 22 Registered: 1/13/08
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 9, 2008 8:21 PM Go to message in response to: nickakels

he should only take off the one to toss. (The one thats lower)

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Whitb55 Posts : 435 Registered: 12/16/07
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 10, 2008 2:36 AM Go to message in response to: nickakels

My FH wants to do the garter toss, probably so he can have a little moment and his friends can look dumb. I have instructed him to not lift my dress up high or stick his head up in there or take it off with his teeth. I might still talk him out of it though. I have big thighs and dont want to deal with wearing one. If he insists and it would really make him happy I will just slip on on right before. I am not a prude I just dont want to act like that in front of my family (especially grandparents and ect).  

As for the keep one throw one garter you keep the one that is bigger and bit more fancy and you throw the smaller one. Not sure why, I am guessing it is just because the fancy one is a better keep sake for you and the smaller one is kept by the guy who catches it and who knows what he ends up doing with it. You can wear it just for the garter toss or your husband can pull it out of his pocket, either way.  

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Whitb55 Posts : 435 Registered: 12/16/07
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 10, 2008 2:41 AM Go to message in response to: nickakels

Okay just had an idea. I might have the bouquet toss and garter toss at almost the same time. Make the DJ announce for all single men to gather behind the groom and all single girls to line up behind the bride. I will already have my bouquet and husband will have the garter in his hand already (eliminating the reaching up the skirt) and he can toss that and then I toss the bouquet. Maybe that is a way to skip it, but still do it. I wonder if people will miss the cabaret music and my husband inbetween my legs or if they will even notice. 

All of our bridal/groom party is younger and a few are married (most aren't) and there will be some other single friends there. So I would like to do it I am just against being a skank haha.

Here is another question though. Who keeps the bouquet? The girl who catches it? Or does she give it back to the bride? I would like to keep my bouquet because I might find a way to preserve it. I have hard you can press it and frame it. However, I dont want to be tacky so I am not sure. Pictures might just be best. 

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nickakels Posts : 71 Registered: 1/3/08
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 10, 2008 9:14 AM Go to message in response to: Whitb55

I've heard a lot about having a toss bouquet; either ask your florist to make a duplicate or to give you leftover flowers for cheap and put you own together. Or, to save on the overly high price of flower preservation, make a twin bouquet out of silk flowers to keep & toss the real one. If you do have 2 made but want to justify the cost, you could stick them in vases and put them at the head/gift/cake table as centerpices then do the toss after the reception.

I know I'm doing the BM bouquets silk to save bookoo $ and so I have less to mess with the day of the wedding (I can rest easy knowing at least SOMETHING is done months ahead). Also, since my BMs are family, they may want to keep them

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nickakels Posts : 71 Registered: 1/3/08
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 10, 2008 9:23 AM Go to message in response to: nickakels

Is anyone doing the bride's bouquet w/ silk?  Where's a good place to buy silk flowers? I was going to make mine out of silk bc we're POOR :) but I can't find lilies that look good (specifically stargazers)

But on the original topic: I think FH was looking forward to the garter toss.  I asked how he'd feel if we didn't have one. He said he didn't care, but that just means he doesn't want me to be unhappy and I think he'd really enjoy it.

His BIL/bestman jokingly offered to jump between my family and FH during the garter bit so he could be sneaky about it!

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HLYflute Posts : 1,282 Registered: 2/5/07
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 10, 2008 12:35 PM Go to message in response to: nickakels

I had two bouquets.  My real one, and then a tossing bouquet that the florist left at the reception hall for me.  It was made out of silk flowers... it doesn't need to be anything fancy since you're just tossing it to a random person anyway.  I'm not sure that she even charged us for it; if she did, it was probably like $5 or something minimal.

As for the garter, just don't put it very high up on your leg.  I had mine right above my knee... so figure if he only lifts your skirt that high, it's no different than you wearing a knee length skirt.  Have a talk with your FH ahead of time to discuss what is appropriate and inappropriate garter removal behavior, and make sure he understands.

And as the pp's have mentioned, the fancier garter is for keeping and the less fancy one is for tossing.  I only had a tossing one because I didn't really care.  I got it for  $2 at the craft store! 

What I think is really creepy is when they make the bouquet catcher and the garter catcher dance together, and then the random guy puts the garter on the random girls leg.  We skipped that part. 

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PTGirl09 Posts : 141 Registered: 9/4/06
Re: Garter Toss! Save me!
Posted: Feb 10, 2008 1:35 PM Go to message in response to: HLYflute

We did the garter toss, but the taking the garter off wasn't tacky at all.  I had a toss bouquet that was included in the package, but if you don't want to have another one made, why not toss one of the bridesmaid's bouquets (they rarely keep them).  Or have your florist grab some flowers from the ceremony arrangements after its over and tie them with a ribbon. 

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