I want to lay the whole story out there.
Back in high school we went through a rough patch and had what he interpreted as an undefined relationship (I assumed we were still a couple). Well one of my mom’s co-workers said something about her pregnant daughter was going to prom with Rob B. and how nice it was that he would take a pregnant girl. My mom was like “Uhh my daughter is also going to Prom with him”. I confronted him, he apologized and we went to Prom. I blamed myself for getting mad because I had obviously misunderstood the boundaries in that period of our relationship.
We fought on and off but never anything major, I’d get upset when he wouldn’t call for a few days or when I couldn’t get a hold of him I’d get nervous remembering the Prom incident. Well our relationship progressed and we got engaged. I was thrilled. I loved Rob. He made me laugh and had the same crazy humor I did. We didn’t pick a date for about 2 years but ideas and such were coming together the whole time. We had a rough patch in our engagement when Rob dropped out of college and had no job. We cooled but never completely broke up. I stopped wearing the ring but Rob would call and tell me how much he loved me and was trying to get a job etc. When he joined the Marine Corps I was terrified of losing him and decided to put the ring back on.
When he got discharged, he wanted to get married right away. We picked our date (April 22) and started diving in the planning and house hunting. We bought a house (my name only on the title) and started making it our home. We attended about 6 weeks of premarital counseling and that really helped the rough spots for a while.
Fast forward to Tuesday. He came to work to sign some papers and said that we needed to talk later. I said “Just say it” because I could tell what he was going to say. He said the whole “I think we should wait, I can’t do it” part and I said that it was probably cold feet. We agreed to talk later that night. I called our pastor and arranged to meet with him. Meanwhile, later that afternoon Rob called and said that I was right, it was just cold feet. We would be getting married on Saturday as planned. Well we went to the pastor and a lot came out. Rob said that he did not think counseling would help us and that he agreed to get married (calling it cold feet) only because he didn’t want to make me upset. He wanted to postpone but admitted he wasn’t sure he would ever be ready. Well I said that I couldn’t trust after that and gave the ring back.
Yesterday my sister came home from school and said that this girl had been dating this boy named Rob who was getting married in a few days (she had known the girl was dating this Rob for a few weeks but didn’t put it all together) but was pretty excited because he broke up with his fiancé. THEN she Rob picking that girl AND HER BABY up from school. I am devastated. Wrecked.
There is so much going through my mind. But it does explain the loose ends and sometimes mysterious actions of Rob. I guess what really hurts is the fact that he didn’t want to have kids for about 10+ years but he will date someone else who has a child.
We are over. I can’t trust after 2 times.
Thanks for the love and support.
not that it will help to hear, but you deserve better!!!! and you will find him yet.
