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Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE

Online Users: 701 guest(s), 0 user(s). Replies: 39

RomanticGirl Posts : 777 Registered: 3/28/06
Re: Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE
Posted: Apr 19, 2006 5:51 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I didn't realize he was that young. I think that in this case, it is still possible that you could have a happy and healthy marriage down the line. In my opinion, the fact that he is only 21 colors the situation differently. Few 21 year old men are able to be at peace with being married and it can have very little to do with who they are marrying. Marriage can be wonderful for a young couple, but it's not for every young couple.I think this could easily go either way (meaning you could end up together or not), and it's really up to the two of you to figure out what is healthiest.

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Re: Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE
Posted: Apr 19, 2006 6:19 PM Go to message in response to: RomanticGirl

Im so sorry sweetheart. What a terrible thing to have happen, especially so close to your wedding day. At least it was said now rather than after the wedding. Yes it is hard to deal with and it sucks but would you rather be out before the wedding or spend more time with this man thinking that he was the one only to be getting divorced later. Im sorry you have to deal with this, you will find the man you are meant to be with. A man that will love you for you and want to spend the rest of his life with you. Good luck. We are all here for you.

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Re: Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE
Posted: Apr 19, 2006 6:37 PM Go to message in response to: Guest


RomeWedding wrote:

To become free from someone who does not want you with all of his heart is a gift. You deserve someone who wants you completely. 

I agree completely, and I also agree that Rob may still be that person.  You are both still fairly young, and although I don't think there is anything wrong with being ready marry when you're young, there is also nothing wrong with not being ready.  Again, regardless of the choices you make now, I wish you luck and happiness! 

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Re: Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE
Posted: Apr 19, 2006 7:58 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

Sigh, yes Katie said she was willing to consider counseling, then when her guy said he wanted to postpone she balked and said everything was over.  I guess I wasn't clear, if one person in the relationship wants to postpone the wedding when they are 21, that is what should be done.  Katie appears to me to have only wanted counseling if it still meant she could get married Saturday, 2 days of counseling is not the kind of counseling they need.  Postponing a wedding when you are 21 and not ready, is not the end of the world, nor should it always be the end of the relationship if both parties are willing to come to the table and talk about what's going on.  Only being willing to do counseling if it means you get to keep your original wedding date, is not really being willing to do counseling, it's trying to scare and corner someone who's not ready to be married into marriage.

counseling
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Re: Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE
Posted: Apr 19, 2006 10:04 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I just want you to know that you truly are in my thoughts and prayers. I feel like I know you from the modern bride boards. I think that you did the right thing. My advice is to do what you feel is right. If you are meant to be together then things will work out.

I agree with some of the other girls. After you have mourned...take some time for yourself.  Please still drop by. Let us know how things are going!!

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Re: Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE
Posted: Apr 19, 2006 11:03 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I know I have not posted in a while but I had to come back for this. Katie, your story has made it's way all the way over to our Kolohe Inc forum. A lot of the ladies on there can not log into brides at all but are dying to lend their support to you.

I am truely sorry you are going through this. What a horrible thing to be happening. All I can offer is some sound advice I firmly believe it. Everything happens for a reason. One day it will be clear that this turn has saved you from some other pain down the track. One way or another.


If you want someone to talk to, feel free to email me at Zoe@theplanet.net.au or come to Kolohe inc forums at www.KoloheInc.co.nr where it is not to wedding orientated. I am very sorry and just had to come back when I heard the news and let you know we are all thinking of you.

Zoë

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Re: Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE
Posted: Apr 20, 2006 1:07 AM Go to message in response to: Guest

OMG Katie I'm so sorry for what you are going through!  I'm very sorry hun for all the pain and hurt you are going through!  I wish you all the best sweetie!

I'm sorry it took till now for me to post but I used to be a Brides.com girl before the merger and now my home is with Zoe at her site.  The girls there are worried and concern about you and you are in all of our thoughts.  All the girls want to give you their support!  Please join us at Zoe's site www.KoloheInc.co.nr, there are so many topics and it's not all about weddings.  We are a "family"! 

Message was edited by CantWaitToBeMrsDobrosky on Apr 20, 2006 1:08 AM

Message was edited by CantWaitToBeMrsDobrosky on Apr 20, 2006 1:10 AM

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Re: Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE
Posted: Apr 20, 2006 1:24 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I am also very sorry for what you are going through.   I just wanted to tell you that my friend went thorough a similar situation. 

Something happened to her FH just as they were about to mail out the invitation.  He became very distant and she knew something was wrong.  They talked about things and he told her that he didn't want to get married.  She was devastated at first. 

But she knew that he was the one that she was supposed to spend the rest of her life with.  They spent a few days apart, thought about things and finally talked things through.  They ended up postponing the wedding for a year and they are now expecting their first child.

So ultimately, if you feel that he is "the one" take some time, think and talk to each other.

I hope everything works out for you!!

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Re: Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE
Posted: Apr 20, 2006 1:24 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I am also very sorry for what you are going through.   I just wanted to tell you that my friend went thorough a similar situation. 

Something happened to her FH just as they were about to mail out the invitation.  He became very distant and she knew something was wrong.  They talked about things and he told her that he didn't want to get married.  She was devastated at first. 

But she knew that he was the one that she was supposed to spend the rest of her life with.  They spent a few days apart, thought about things and finally talked things through.  They ended up postponing the wedding for a year and they are now expecting their first child.

So ultimately, if you feel that he is "the one" take some time, think and talk to each other.

I hope everything works out for you!!

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Re: Cold Feet or break-up? - UPDATE
Posted: Apr 20, 2006 1:59 PM Go to message in response to: katiemae1985

Katie dear, I am so sorry that this happened now of all times, however, be grateful that you found this out now instead of after the wedding.  If he is having doubts, then it is best they came now.  It is totally unfair to you that he did this at a time like this, but it would be unfair as well to go into the marriage having doubts.  I wish you the best of luck!

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