Budget Etiquette
- Question:
- My fiancé never had any interest in planning our day. Suddenly, with the wedding three months away, he's got all these ideas—a bagpiper, a bigger cake and a new honeymoon spot. Do I have to change our plans?
- Answer:
Funny how guys who roll their eyes when you ask them about china patterns suddenly become style gurus once the pieces are in place. Your fiancé is probably feeling left out. You don't have to alter your plans substantially, but you should see if you can incorporate some of his ideas. Start by explaining that certain things would be hard or expensive to change—especially if a contract has been signed or plane tickets purchased. Then consider his requests that are doable. For example, if he can find a bagpiper on short notice, let him hire one. Ask your baker to add a tier or two, or to make a groom's cake. Even the gesture of making an effort—and letting him pitch in—will help your fiancé feel more included.
- This content originally appeared in Brides magazine.
- How much are we supposed to tip, and when?
- How can I get my parents to give me more money for the wedding?
- Who pays for flower girl outfits?
- How can I get my parents to stop making me feel guilty about the wedding's cost?
- Can my dad control the guest list if he is paying?
- Who should I notify about my name change?
- Should I pay for the bridesmaid dresses?
- Can I have a reception with selected guests?
- How should I talk money with my in-laws?
- What does the groom's family pay for?
- Must I invite everyone who invited me?
- How can my poorer guy and I split wedding costs?
- Can we ask guests to pay for their own hotels?
Submit Your Own Etiquette Question
Have an etiquette question you'd like our editors to answer?
- Do I have to have my wedding in my hometown?
- Should I pay for my bridesmaids' and dates' rooms?
- What should I do about a broke bridesmaid?
- How do contributers appear on the invite?
- How do I handle ill-timed financial offers?
- How do I thank those who've helped?
- Can I get what I want if my parents are paying?
- Do vendors prefer cash tips?
- Should my parents have a say?
- Who pays for out-of-town guests' hotel accomodations?
- Must we pay for his parents' hotel room?
- Do we have to tell people how much we're spending on the wedding?
- Do I have to accommodate my fiancé's last minute plans?
- How can I get my fiancé to be more involved in the wedding planning?
- Can I plan my wedding at work?
