As eager as we at BRIDES are to hear the official announcement of Prince William and Kate Middleton's royal engagement (rumor has it the cases of champagne have already been ordered), the tabloids are probably just as eager to see what kind of shenanigans rowdy little brother Harry gets himself into on the big day. Here are some tips on how William can lay down the law at his wedding—and how to handle yours if someone gets out of control:
This guy will do anything for a laugh. "Our best man decorated the getaway car with so much shaving cream, we couldn't see out the windows," says Ellen, 32. "We cleared a few inches of windshield to get out of the garage but had to hit a 24/7 car wash before we could start the honeymoon."
How to Deal: Ask the other groomsmen to watch him toward evening's end, when he's most likely to prey on your Toyota. If anyone sees him heading out the door with a 12-pack of Charmin, alert the posse.
Back in college, she knew where to score the best weed. But while the rest of you moved on, she still has a big crush on her bong. "At the last minute, I had to ask one of my bridesmaids to give a toast at the rehearsal dinner," says Vanessa, 25, "because my maid of honor was getting high in the restaurant parking lot."
How to Deal: Give all your bridesmaids a wedding timeline, so they know when they need to be sober. And it couldn't hurt to schedule the toasts earlier in the evening rather than later.
The bigger the bridal party, the better for this serial seducer. He likes his gals short, tall, blonde, brunette, slim, voluptuous, or just breathing. Discretion is not his strong suit. "We had a destination wedding in Mexico, and being in an exotic place must have given him extra nerve," says Cherie, 27. "He slept with one of my attendants after the rehearsal dinner and ended up in bed with another following the reception."
How to Deal: This is your fiance's problem. See if he can talk some sense into Casanova before the big day. Also: Warn your sorority sisters.
She holds herself together until she hears the first chords of "Wedding March." Then the sobbing becomes so loud, she nearly drowns out the organ. This emotional attendant calms down during the sermon but cranks it up during the vows. "My maid of honor was crying so hard and making so much noise, no one in the back of the church could hear us!" says Kelly, 28.
How to Deal: There's nothing you can do at the ceremony (short of throwing her out), but if her bawling continues at the reception, ask someone to take her outside for air. And forbid her to make a toast!
Lots of people drink at weddings. But you have to knock back quite a few shots to make a fool out of yourself in front of 157 people, most of whom are strangers. "One of the groomsmen grabbed the mike and started doing a Mick Jagger imitation to '(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction,'" remembers Eve, 30. "That wasn't so bad—until I realized he was changing the last word to 'fornication.'"
How to Deal: Like the Joker, the Boozer needs a keeper. Also give the waitstaff a heads-up to cut him off if they overhear him challenging Grandma Ruth to a game of beer pong.
—Nancy Mattia, BRIDES magazine