Photo: Megan Clouse
You've made it official, either with a ring or vows — and now you're on your path to creating and combining your lives and families. But first, let's tackle the holidays. If this is your first holiday as a married or engaged couple, fear not! We're here to help. Here's some advice on how to navigate the potentially murky waters of family holidays.
Evaluate Your Traditions
Relax, you don't have to reinvent the wheel here. Be sure you communicate with your partner about how your families traditionally spend Mother's Day. If your family never really makes a big deal and a phone call and a bouquet are the norm — there's no reason to go all out or shake things up. If both of you traditionally spend the day with your respective families, then it's time to compromise. While it may seem awkward or complicated at first, try to remember the reason for this, it's the blending and merging of two families all because of you and the love of your life. It's all good.
Create a Rotation
One option that can help maintain tradition (and sanity) is to create a holiday rotation. If last year you spent Mother's Day with his family, this year it can be your turn. If this is the first time sticking together for the day, explain to both families your intentions of taking turns moving forward and choose together which family to begin with. (If you want to be super fair, you can even flip a coin.) Just be certain that whichever mom you reserve for next year still feels the love!
There's two ways to conquer Mother's Day like a champ and still see both moms. For couples who are lucky enough to have your families live in near proximity to one another, you can split the day. Brunch with your mom and dinner with your mother-in-law? Boom.
Luckily, weekends also have TWO glorious days (we WISH it was three, or four...) Anyway — if you want to ensure that each of your moms has the time and attention they deserve and can't do that on Sunday alone, celebrate "Mother's Day Weekend" instead. Spend Saturday with one mom, and Sunday with the other. Be sure to set aside a little alone time for the weekend too, so you're not running around like crazy.
If you can swing it, this is perhaps the best way to keep everyone together, happy, and have some serious family bonding too. If you've recently moved in together, offer to host both your mom's for the special event! Or, invite both families to brunch. This not only streamlines things (in your favor, too!) but it also will help to create family memories for years to come.