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We asked women for advice they received on the eve of their wedding day — that has resonated through the years.
"My parents told my now husband and I before we got married, 'What you fight about now, you'll fight about in 20 years.' We aren't big fighters, but their point was that you can't change a person, so if there is something that bothers one of you about the other that you think will change over time, it won't, so go into the marriage knowing that." — Kate
"The BEST advice ever: 'Never go to bed angry.' Those five simple words
have translated into a marriage that marks 25 years this coming May. We are still on our honeymoon, three kids later." — Wendy
"This advice is something I go back to time and again whenever my husband does something that annoys me: 'Instead of trying to change your partner, love the imperfection.'" — Karen
"You're entitled to the occasional bad mood. You're not entitled to make your partner the whipping boy." — Sherry
"My sister, who is divorced, told me this on my wedding day three years ago: 'Never threaten divorce unless you mean it.'" — Ally
"This advice is simple but profound: 'Treat your partner the way you want to be treated.'" — Debi
"Would you rather be right or be happy together? Marriage is compromise. Sometimes you get your way; sometimes he does. You both win over the long haul when you compromise." — Paula
"This has come in handy on more than one occasion: 'Celebrate your partner's successes as joyfully as you celebrate your own.'" — Fern
"Be kind to one another. Sometimes this can be very hard to do indeed but if you find yourself being nicer to strangers than to the person you married you need to course correct. Pronto!' — Rachel
"I read this in a magazine a few days before my wedding: 'A happy marriage is made up of two really good forgivers.'" — Ally
"Don't let a day go by without kissing!" — Olive
"Believe it or not, this advice came from my mother: 'Fight naked.'" — Beth
Sherry Amatenstein, LCSW is a New York City-based marriage therapist and author.