Real Brides Share the Best Advice Their Married Older Sisters Gave Them

Advice from a Married Older Sister

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Your older sister taught you many things — from how to apply makeup and flirt to how to twist mom and dad around your little finger. So who better to give you advice on your wedding day?

"My sister told me something that has stayed with me through the so far 10 plus years of my marriage: 'Your husband is not Prince Charming but you're not Cinderella either. Allow each other to not be perfect but real.'" —Becca

"Every day do something sweet and loving for your partner. It can be anything from giving him coffee in bed to complimenting him on his sparkling blue eyes to buying tickets for the Bengals game." —Sheila

See More: Real Brides Share the Best Advice Their Mom's Gave Them

"Don't worry about any of the guests on your wedding day. It's one of the few days in your life when it really is all about you!" —Tina

"Don't expect your husband to satisfy all your needs and make you completely happy. You need friends, hobbies, things that are just about you. Just as he needs things that are just about him." —Amanda

"Couples therapy isn't only for when there is a crisis in the marriage. It can help the two of you learn to communicate better and unearth deeper issues you might be repressing." —Megan

"Get someone in to clean the house twice a month. Period!!!" —Linda

"Your partner needs to be your top priority, even before the kids. I don't mean neglect your kids but if being a parent becomes all the marriage is about, that doesn't benefit anyone." —Ellen

"Don't fight to the death. You don't 'win' if the object is to KO your partner. Keep the argument about the issue that triggered the upset and work toward problem solving, not name calling and attacking and bringing up a fight from three years ago." —Yvette

"You don't need to tell him that his sister is a bitter shrew. That's what your friends are for." —Anne

"Don't threaten divorce unless you really mean it." —Sue

"If something upsets you, tell your husband. He really, really, really is not a mind reader." —Sharon

"Marriage is a marathon not a sprint. There are times it feel easy and fun, and other times it will feel like you can't last another moment. But you keep persevering rather than quitting at the first blister and in the end you don't remember the moments of pain but the beauty of the whole experience." —Bonnie

Sherry Amatenstein is a New York City-based marriage therapist and author.

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