Moms: Here's How to Avoid Upstaging the Bride

Moms Avoid Upstaging Bride

Photo: Lane Dittoe

Oh no, she didn't! Moms, if there's one thing you definitely don't want to do on your daughter or daughter-in-law's big day it's to have all eyes on you for all of the wrong reasons. It's your time to shine, yes, but there's a delicate balance between standing out from the rest of the crowd and upstaging the bride. So take our advice, and know your role. We swear you'll still look amazing and feel like a VIP too.

Don't wear white or anything close to it
Sorry, mom! As much as you love that light beige dress, it's probably not going to work out in your favor. Unless specifically requested by the bride, wedding planner Amy Shey Jacobs, President of Chandelier Events, strongly urges moms to steer clear of gowns in ivory, cream, champagne and anything remotely close to white, particularly if it's made of lace.

Keep it classy
Just to be clear moms, the bride is the only one who should be bringing sexy back but that doesn't mean you can't dress to impress. Simply stay away from plunging necklines and anything backless or super short, warns San Francisco-based wedding planner Amy Nichols of Amy Nichols Special Events. "While you may have killer legs or a sculpted back, today is the day to let your daughter take the spotlight."

Stick to your regular beauty routine
Otherwise, you may wind up stealing the bride's thunder, and no, not in a good way! "Whether it's your first spray tan, last-minute botox or fillers that could backfire or something even more significant, don't use the wedding as an excuse to justify dyeing your hair platinum blonde, getting plastic surgery or whatever it is," cautions Nichols. Beauty extremes right before the wedding are always a big no-no.

See More: 4 Things to Remember If You Let Your Bridesmaids Choose Their Own Accessories

Don't veer from the game plan
That means no impromptu speeches unless your daughter specifically asks you to or surprise choreographed dance numbers, and definitely keep your alcohol consumption in check, advises Nichols. "Of course it's a wedding and you'll want to have fun, but you don't want the "story" from the wedding to be about you."

Put on a happy face
As Jacobs explains, your daughter's joy is absolutely reflective of those around her. "So even if it isn't the song you would have chosen for her to walk down the aisle to or the flower design you would have dreamed up, make every effort to smile and show approval of the planning choices she made." Your happiness will be contagious.

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