Photo: Diana Lupu Photography
Since many modern couples already live together and have all of the housewares they need, they don't need the items you'd find on a typical wedding registry list. On the other hand, demanding cash from guests may rub some attendees the wrong way. here, our etiquette experts weigh in on exactly how to ask for monetary gifts without offending your friends and family or appearing gauche.
Asking your wedding guests for financial gifts in lieu of lobster crackers or patterned china is entirely acceptable, but requires a more nuanced approach than passing along your registry details. You guests may balk at the notion of supplying you with an envelope of cash because of the impersonal nature of the gesture, so be sure to spread the word in a way that conveys what the capital will mean to you. Many couples find the most effective manner of doing this is by setting up a wedding fund, and elaborating on exactly what the money will go towards.
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If you have a wedding website, pass along the news of your wedding fund by stating something to the effect of, "We are fortunate to have our home essentials stocked, but we would love your help in travelling the world/learning the art of Italian cooking/pursuing our goal of biking in the Tour de France." You can also go the route of online registry sites solely dedicated to monetary gifts, like Tendr, which touts itself as the "elegant way to give and receive cash gifts." Verbally informing friends and family is also an effective means of spreading the word. Some guests may still wish to gift you a tea set or cocktail shaker, but subtly encouraging guests to contribute to an established fund will ensure more cash gifts.