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Every week, we give our readers a glimpse inside the mindset of a guy's brain on weddings with the help of the hilarious and smart editors at The Plunge. For their latest post, they're admitting to the mistakes many guys are bound to make during the planing process.
Our mission at The Plunge is to give men the tools they need to make themselves useful during the complicated wedding planning process. However, guys are guys, and even our faithful readers sometimes screw up. Fortunately, their mistakes are fairly predictable and all have quick and dirty fixes that will keep you two working together as one. You know, like married couples do.
Mistake 1: Completely Shutting Down
Guys want you to think "wedding planning" are the two most disheartening words in the English language (besides maybe "erectile dysfunction") so they can justify avoiding it. Also known as throwing you under the bus.
How You Can Help: Don't be fooled. We already told you what he wants to help with, so give him those responsibilities and act like his efforts will yield the greatest wedding ever. Everyone wants to impact the results; guys just don't want to drown in details.
Mistake 2: Becoming Debbie Downer
The top complaint we hear from women is that their fiancès say they don't care, only to emerge after months of gloomy silence to criticize at the last second without offering anything constructive.
How You Can Help: Honestly tell him it's great of him to take interest but if he has nothing nice to say then, well, he knows the rest. To bring good groom karma (aka husband karma) to the situation, every once in a while he'll have to offer a positive suggestion, take a stand, or fake enthusiasm like you do when he talks about his fantasy team.
Mistake 3: Ignoring the Gift Registry
We have to defend our bros a little here. When a woman suggests a day of registry shopping at Bed Bath & Beyond, the natural male response is to go fetal. However, we know that doesn't make it right. You shouldn't be left alone to try and decide which blender is best. (Seriously, how are there so many blenders?)
How You Can Help: Guys like gifts, too (who doesn't?) so try broadening the options to places like Amazon and Target that offer enough range for both of you to find appealing gifts. Tell him you need his input to make sure you're getting the best return policy and the most out of the system, and then have him read up on our clever registry hacks.
Mistake 4: Turning Into Groomzilla
Opposite the spectrum from "utterly oblivious" is the obsessive, penny-counting, micro-managing Groomzilla. That guy cares way too much about every little detail to the point where he out-brides the bride. Nobody likes that guy.
How You Can Help: "Wow, honey, you really have a knack for this. You think rhododendrons or ranunculus fit the theme better? Have you thought at all about what kind of dress you want?" That should do the trick.
Mistake 5: Forgetting Your Wedding Is A Celebration
Your wedding is many things to many people, but to all people it should be a celebration. And celebrations are fun! Unfortunately, all those aforementioned people have a way of getting involved that can kill the fun for the people who should be enjoying it most.
How You Can Help: This is one mistake that both sides need to learn not to make. Keep perspective and make it a point to work together to make sure there's plenty of good food, music, booze, and people. Lean on your fiancè to help you keep things fun and lighthearted whenever someone's mother gets in the way. Make it yours, because ultimately it's the two of you who are setting off on this journey together.
Even if they don't seem super involved in the wedding-planning process, grooms are going through the same life-changing experience as their brides-to-be. Enter: The Plunge. The site helps the engaged guy navigate his wedding from a man's point of view.