Just Married? Here Are 3 Pieces of Advice Every Newlywed Couple Should Know


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Weddings signify the start of a new life, which means it presents a lot of overwhelming questions! Just because the wedding cake has been cut and the dress has been put away in storage doesn't mean all of your etiquette problems are over. We consulted some experts to get answers to some of married life's toughest conundrums.

How often is too often for my in-laws to visit?
Only you and your husband can answer that question (though we can tell you multiple daily unannounced drop-ins à la Everybody Loves Raymond is almost never OK.) Talk to your husband about how often you feel comfortable seeing your in-laws and what kind of boundaries you want to set in place (like a phone call before every visit). Then ask him to lay down the law. Do keep in mind that no matter how inconvenient or annoying you may find these people, your husband loves them, and he may not want to curtail his family time. If that's the case, feel free to take yourself out of the equation during some of their visits by running an errand or meeting up with the girls for drinks while they bond with their boy. BTW, always be nice. If you have kids one day, you're going to be psyched to have your in-laws around. (Free babysitting!)

My husband is a homebody, and I love to go out. Is it OK for me to attend social outings solo? He's told me he's fine with it.
Go for it. Having experiences and hobbies outside of your marriage can actually strengthen a relationship. But remember, you're married, so don't spend all your time away from home. Put a limit on your solo evenings out and check in with him often to make sure that he's not feeling totally abandoned. And set up a weekly date night to make sure that the two of you are getting enough one-on-one time. P.S. You don't have to let him totally off the hook; there will be some social and business outings you'll want him to attend. Just give him plenty of notice so he can psych himself up for them ahead of time.

Should I force my husband to wear his wedding ring?
Hmmm. Forcing him to do anything is probably not the best way to kick off married life. Instead, try talking to your husband about why he isn't wearing his ring. Maybe he's not great at remembering to put it on in the morning. (Solution: Have him put it in a bowl next to his keys.) Maybe it makes his finger itch. (Take him to a dermatologist.) Or maybe he has a side job as a Prince William impersonator. (Not much you can do about that; Kate's better half, like many Brits, doesn't wear one, either.) But if it turns out that he just plain old doesn't want to wear it, ask him to explain why. If he starts stuttering something about his friends and identity crises and feeling like he's looking at his dad's hand when he's wearing it, you may have a bigger problem on your hands. Tell him that you love him and that you get that it can be tough making the transition from single to married but that he is married, and not wearing the ring isn't going to change that. In fact, wearing a big fat golden reminder of your union every day may just help him ease into his new role. Then make an appointment with a couples counselor, stat.

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