Are We Supposed to Pay for Our Attendants' Hotel Rooms for a Destination Wedding?

Etiquette
who pays for attendants' hotel rooms for a destination wedding

Photo: Ahava Studios

So you're having a destination wedding. Now come the questions: Who pays for what? Do the bride and groom pay for everything? What about hotel rooms for the bridesmaids and groomsmen? Our wedding etiquette experts are here to answer your destination wedding questions in our daily post.

We've decided to have a destination wedding. Are we supposed to pay for our attendants' hotel rooms?

Traditionally, the bridesmaids and groomsmen are responsible for getting themselves to the wedding, whether the celebration is held near or far. That being said, if your wedding budget can cover your attendants' lodging costs, the gesture will be very much appreciated.

However, if your budget cannot accommodate their lodging, but you know that someone in your wedding party might be struggling with the travel costs, it would be very kind to lend a hand to that person. If you are both discreet about it, it isn't necessary to extend that offer to anyone else. Also, if you're not able to cover all your attendants' lodging costs, it would be thoughtful to tell them that their presence is a gift to you, so they know they don't need to spend additional money on a wedding gift.

Lastly, logistics-wise, it may make more sense for you to book your attendants' lodging on their behalf. So if you reserve the rooms to save them the effort, be clear about who will pay. But whatever you decide, be up front about it so all your attendants can accurately budget for the trip.

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