Should I Send a Wedding Invitation to a Friend Who Already Told Me She Can't Attend?


You've chosen a wedding date and sent out the save-the-date cards. Good job on staying on top of wedding planning! However, one of your friends has already told you that she will be unable to make it to your big day. Are you supposed to still send her an invitation as a courtesy? Or are there unexpected strings attached in doing so? Our wedding etiquette experts are here to answer your wedding invitation and stationery questions in our daily post.

A friend already told me she is unable to attend my wedding. Do I still need to send her an invitation?

This one is tricky, since it is always nice to receive something fun in the mail (something that's not a bill!) and there is a chance she may change her mind or that her plans will change somewhere down the road. But because a wedding invitation comes with the expectation of a gift, you do not want people to think they have to give a present even though they cannot attend the celebration. So if someone lets you know that they have a conflict, don't follow up with an invitation. Besides, each individual invitation does cost money, what with postage and envelopes. However, in the case of very close friends and family, you may want to send an invitation anyway with a note inside that explains you are sending it as a keepsake. They will appreciate the memento and still feel included even though they are not able to attend.

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