Can I Vet My Dad's Toast Before the Wedding?


If your father isn't exactly the best public speaker, is it OK to ask to read his wedding reception toast before the wedding? Or will he be offended? Our wedding etiquette experts are here to answer your toasting questions in our daily post.

My dad isn't the greatest public speaker—can I vet his toast before the wedding?

While it's not customary for the bride to get a sneak peek at any of the wedding toasts, if you're concerned about your dad's speech and feel comfortable enough with him to make that request, then go for it. Just know that if you review the toast before the wedding, you may not feel the same emotional impact when he delivers the real thing at the reception.

But be prepared for him to say no. After all, your dad has probably been working on his speech for some time now and he may want to keep it under wraps. If that's the deal, then see if you can get your mom on the case. Let her know your concerns so that she can tactfully help him craft what will probably be the most emotional speech of his life. But regardless of what happens, don't forget that you'll be surrounded by your nearest and dearest at the wedding, many of whom probably know your father very well, too. So if he winds up saying something that's a wee bit cringe-worthy, your guests will likely chalk it up to nerves and quickly laugh it off.

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