A Polite, Diplomatic Way to Ask Your Future In-Laws to Help Pay for Your Wedding

Wedding budget etiquette for parents of the groom

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Even if you're trying to slash your wedding budget, you may still expect financial help from your parents or from your fiancé's parents. These days, the tradition that the bride's parents pay for the entire wedding is passé. How do you broach the subject of payment with the groom-to-be's parents, especially if they are already preparing to pay for another child's wedding? Our wedding etiquette experts are here to answer your budget questions in our daily post.

My fiancé's folks are saving up to pay for his sister's wedding, which is four months before ours, but they have not offered to contribute to our budget. My parents afford can't foot the entire bill, and we're broke. Can we ask them for help?

Yes, but have your fiance sit down with his mom and dad alone, since they may feel awkward talking about such a touchy subject around you. He should discuss the type of wedding you would like to have and the estimated budget, then ask them if they were thinking of contributing anything toward it and, if so, how much. Maybe they are the old-fashioned types who think that the bride's family will pay for the whole enchilada (which is a rarity these days). Whatever their response, he should be gracious and not gripe. If the amount is meager, you may have to get creative: Consider scaling back your wedding, or start brainstorming on the best ways to save.

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