I Don't Want to Invite My Future In-Laws' Coworkers to My Small Wedding. What Should I Do?

Etiquette
Coworker wedding invitation etiquette

Photo: Brian Finke

Numbers can get tricky when hammering out a guest list and sending out wedding invitations, especially for a small wedding. What should you do if either set of parents is angling to add a lot of extra guests to an intentionally small guest list? Our wedding etiquette experts are here to answer your family and guest questions in our daily post.

My future in-laws want to invite tons of business associates and distant relatives to the wedding. I'd prefer to keep it small. Am I justified in refusing to include so many unknown faces?

Unfortunately, this is a pretty common problem. Your fiancé's parents are happy their son is getting married and want everyone they love to be able to join in the celebration. Can you blame them? Before saying anything, first think about how many people in total they are inviting. If the rest of their list is relatively small, then would it really be so bad to let them invite a few people you don't know? If, however, their list keeps getting longer and longer, and they aren't contributing to the reception budget, then you are completely justified in asking them to limit their number of invites. Discuss it with your fiancé first, and hopefully, he will agree to be the one to broach the subject. And if they still insist on inviting everyone, after a polite thank you for coming, you are free to spend the rest of the reception with those you truly care about.

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