My Fiancé's Mother Wants Me to Call Her "Mom!" How Do I Say No Politely?

Etiquette

As your wedding unites two families, the mother of the bride (or groom) and any other relatives may start acting chummy. But when do friendly relations become too close for comfort? Our wedding etiquette experts are here to answer your in-law questions in our daily post.

My FMIL said that she wants me to call her Mom, but I can't imagine doing that. Help!

You are not alone. Most brides and grooms get queasy when the "Call me Mom/Call me Dad" conversation comes up. First, find out if "Mom" is a daughter-/son-in-law tradition in his family. If it is, then you may want to go along with it. Before long, it'll be no big deal. Alternatively, ask your fiancé if he thinks his mom really means it; she may not be as wedded to the idea as you think. If that's the case, you can say something short and sweet, like "I've been thinking about what to call you and I'd feel more comfortable with 'Janet' than 'Mom.' Would that be all right?" When you put it so sincerely, how could she say no?

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