What Gets a Groom Involved?


Recently, The New York Times ran an article called "A Wedding Plan for Men." In it, author Vincent M. Mallozzi attempts to explain the modern groom's increased involvement in wedding planning this way: "...Couples are now getting married later in life and as a result, they are paying for their own weddings.... So a groom making this kind of investment is more likely to take a more serious interest in the decision-making process, and that has greatly contributed to the trend."

Is this gender stereotyping? Why do we assume a guy's interest in wedding decisions is necessarily financial, while the bride's interest must be largely emotional? I have probably been guilty of making this assumption myself. But when I read this, I thought, Come on! I'm sure there are plenty of grooms out there who are interested in the look of the invitations and the flowers because they care, not just because they're paying! And why is the paper reporting on this as though it is a new trend? Grooms have been involved (some of them almost to the exclusion of their fiancees) for quite some time now.

Do you think this writer's theory about "the modern groom" is accurate, or is your fiance genuinely interested in the wedding plans, not for any financial reasons?—Antonia van der Meer, editor-in-chief, Modern Bride



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