Keeping perspective

Hi, fellow brides-to-be. It's Elaine, MB's engaged editor who's getting married in 17 days. My last post was about the many minor details and small stresses that add up as the wedding approaches. Of course these things are important, but they also can cause you to lose sight of the big picture.

Last Saturday, I attended a baby shower for one of my bridesmaids in Richmond, VA. The other attendees were surprised that I came, the date being so close to my wedding--as if planning a party in a few weeks is an excuse not to celebrate the birth of the first child of one of my oldest and dearest friends! (Not to mention the fact that she's driving seven hours to stand by my side at the altar while almost eight months pregnant.)

The baby is due on June 5, the six year anniversary of her and her husband's wedding, which I remember like it was yesterday. She was my first close friend to tie the knot, so it was the first time I bought a bridesmaid dress, attended a bachelorette party, and choked back tears during a ceremony. Visiting with them over the weekend almost six years later as they excitedly prepare for parenthood was a wonderful reminder of what marriage is really about: creating a life together, building a home and, for some, starting a family.

It's tempting to focus on the near future as your wedding day fast approaches -- if your updo will look just like it did at the trial, if the band will nail your first dance song -- but really it's the distant future that's far more exciting. I'm trying hard to maintain this perspective in the final weeks, which makes it easier to not sweat the small stuff.— Elaine Stuart, Senior Associate Features/Travel Editor, Modern Bride Magazine

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